To be really annoyed with nursery over this

Most nurseries will have a policy where you can't wake a sleeping child.

All very normal for a two year old - self control develops between 3&4. If they can’t cope they are in the wrong job.

Well if your child is banging and slamming about the place, I’m not surprised they prefer her sleeping.

10am is lunch time 🤣

Well this is a fair point. I’m usually dragging my two out of bed at 10am on a Sunday morning. Nephew has been up kicking a ball around since 6.30am 💀

Don’t send her to nursery then.

My LB went to a nursery who had a policy not to wake them up, once he slept for FOUR hours 😱 and then wouldn’t go to bed until 11pm (usually he’d go at 8).
We moved him (unrelated to this although I think we’d have moved him because of this ultimately) and he subsequently went to a nursery who were great about not longer than X or not later than Y.

I feel your pain OP. I think I’d have a frank conversation with the manager and if they are not able to do as you ask then at least you know where you stand and you can decide whether to move.

Both of mine have been terrible sleepers withe relatively low sleep needs in general, this nap stuff used to make me want to cry 😭

I home school my eldest child with a 2 year old here full time as well. I think you are being a little bit dramatic.

DD1 sounds like your nephew! DD2 isn’t quite as reliable but she’s pretty into her sleep. The only downfall is we have natural early risers (and before anyone says it, we have tried everything to adjust this, no naps, earlier naps, short naps, long naps, early bed times, late bed times bla bla) so have settled on us as parents also having early nights and accepting 0530/0600 is when we get up. I think that is karma though 🤣

Would you ask them to bite the bullet and stop the nap altogether? If she's not having it 5 out of the 7 days anyway...?

I agree. I get stuff goes wrong sometimes but it’s irritating and you’d like to think they can follow direction. The attitude on some of the comments the OP has made has been really poor though and to be honest, for the sake of 1 day a week inconvenience I personally wouldn’t be uprooting my toddler from the only childcare she’s known.

Oh good! I’m glad you managed to read my reply among everyone’s. You are really really not alone. Ideally I want my 2 yo out the house for phonics work and that’s why we’ve only done it 3 times since September basically. Luckily we did 3 nice long sessions but a little every day is impossible for me. I have a 5 yo 2 yo and 6 month. The 6 month is a dream. The 2 yo looks me dead in the eyes and does whatever the fck they want.
She will absolutely not watch peppa pig while we sound out SAT PAN and TAP. Not even for a biscuit

You are normal and your children are normal!
Also I would be very politely annoyed at the nursery about the nap times. If my 2 naps for more than an hour she won’t go to bed til 10pm. She’s currently still being put to bed by my husband. People will think we are weird or pushovers or she’s over tired etc. she will not sleep early in the evenings if she’s had a long nap. I know my child and this is fact. Don’t let anyone question your reality or your parenting ability!! Some kids love sleep and can have a 5pm nap and still go to bed at 7:30. Some absolutely cannot for life or death:

urgh you lot don’t know your privilege 😁

my nephew napped like three hours a day until he was about 4 and still went to bed at 7 (took. himself. to bed.) and slept through. Mine were done with naps before 18 months.

Nephew is now 12 and still conks out before 9pm on a school night. My girls loathe sleep and are often found fannying around in their bedrooms until gone 11.

Privilege.

They probably have a waiting list. I worked five days a week when my DC were at nursery and didn’t have the slightest idea of whether they napped in the day or not.

@notaminorthing that’s not you winning though, they won’t care if you leave, plenty more kids to take the spot

I don’t think this is all nurseries! Mine have been really good at following our routine and have reduced the nap when I’ve requested. I have no reason to think they lie - occasionally the nap has gone on longer than requested by mistake and they have always been upfront. A few weeks back he had been off sick for a for a few days and they called me to say he was struggling to wake up and asked if I would I mind him sleeping longer as they didn’t want to upset him.

Ah sorry if I’ve messed up the comments/quotes my bad.

but I think in general - if the OP has asked nursery to stick to a routine and they’ve gone an hour and 20 mins over…..that’s not great! Some kids aren’t affected but hers are. Mine were too which is why I can feel her pain.

I can’t do my 5 yo homework with our 2 yo around. Yanbu!! 2 yo interrupts every couple of seconds

Also, read to your kids together. Get the older one to read to you and the youngest. I have a 2yo and a 5yo and they go to bed at the same time so we all do reading all together. Spellings get done after dinner while we’re still at table so 2 year old can’t wreck them and just carries on eating. But even in year one it’s just spellings three times a week and doing the phonics book a couple of times, genuinely don’t understand what homework a reception kid is getting that needs doing every single evening.

That's an extremely dangerous nursery, dear god, swaddling a 3 year old should get them shut down.

Mine is similar, a change in routine throws bedtime out of the window. Thankfully my nursery has been getting him up at 2 as requested. If I see a weird late nap now I would expect to find he’s not well, and they made a judgment call he needed it, which is of course fine. I think I’d expect to hear that though when picking up.

Perhaps as they have agreed to this already, you could start with asking them what happened with that nap (I.e. why?!!) and reiterate the capping request. I actually think telling them a late nap ends up with a 9/10pm bedtime should be sufficient reasoning, it certainly demonstrates that the long nap is against the child’s best interests.

It really isn't that big of a deal, a polite conversation reminding them to please wake her or your bedtime becomes very late should suffice. These things happen (it's happened with my LO) - it really isn't that bad. I think you're massively over reacting.