Greedy husband?

DH and my sons all eat more than me, as they are almost a foot taller . However, if we are sharing it's divided into equal parts, and then I donate from my share if I want to.
But although half a pizza for a greedy bloke is not enough, it doesn't mean you should be going without or getting less than you want. If he needs more than half, then he just has to order more. For example, if we're in an Indian restaurant, they'll order naan as well as rice, and I probably won't eat any of that. Dh quite often has a pudding which I won't have. It's not fair that he should assume that you are always willing to give up some of your food for him.

The cereal bars are worrying why are you not eating what you want ?

Yes, DH eats more than me. But he doesn’t “expect” to eat more than me.

Your DH is being selfish if he’s taking what he wants to ensure he’s had enough without caring whether you’ve had enough. But day to day, why don’t you (plural) just cook enough for both of you? And order your own meals in a restaurant? If he wants more than half a pizza, order 2.

Yes my partner eats a lot more than me as he is much taller. I make sure to make more food for him than I’d cook for myself, so I get about a third and he gets about two thirds. No way would I share a pizza with him (or probably any meal) as I’m not eating just one third of a pizza for dinner.

Sounds like the issue is not that he’s eating too much or you’re not allowed to eat enough, it’s that there just isn’t enough food provided. (Although my partner wouldn’t just scoff everything and leave me without. Neither of us would want the other to go hungry)

Surely the problem here is that he doesn't seem to care to ask if you are hungry. And just assumes you are happy with the smaller portion which won't always be the case!
You should both expect that he will have a bigger appetite but he should be checking with you once his half of the food is gone and offering to share the remainder with you as necessary.

However, if you have never mentioned it to him, he may not be aware that you are often still hungry. So use your words if you haven't already done so.

My tall skinny OH can definitely out eat me. Could easily eat a whole pizza to himself, but I couldn't. He is a bottomless pit.

If my DH and I ever share food, I make sure to split it the second it comes out otherwise I get so stressed that I won't get enough food as my DH eats so quickly.

Is he overweight? If so then yes he’s being greedy and you need to address this. If not then your current setup is clearly not working as he obviously needs more food and so do you if you’re being left hungry! Two pizzas would be the alternative.

My husband needs more food than me so in this scenario he would have eaten his half and then waited to be offered what was left of mine- probably one or two slices- but he wouldn’t have touched it without me saying it was okay if we’d agreed to share. He’d have probably ordered a portion of chips too as half a pizza wouldn’t fill him up. The issue is your husband is completely disregarding you because you’d agreed to split and he took the majority. Did you not say hey that’s my half when he took more than his fair share?

If you’re constantly giving him more and eating extra food you’ve packed with you though he may not even be aware you’re hungry if you aren’t communicating it.

My dp needs to eat more than me, but that means he orders extra, not that he helps himself to my share!

If we were sharing a pizza, he would eat half, and then I might offer him a slice from my half, but he would never dream of taking my food without an offer.

If he wants more than half then you should order one each.

One pizza between two people- just order enough for 2 of you. He doesn’t sound greedy at all, just an average man.

My ex would always eat a bit more than me - through both of our choices - and I would tend to give my current DP a bit more too (he has a physical job also). We just make sure we cook enough to cater for both of us. If it's a limited shared meal though, DP will always share 50/50 (eg a ready meal for 2). If I knew he was a bit greedy with food, I'd decline to share anything limited (eg the pizza) with him and get 2 individual ones even if more expensive.

It's crazy that you're packing secret cereal bars when you go away! Can you not just get whatever meal you want and he gets what he wants and you maybe give each other a taste but basically eat your own food only? If he wants more he can get more sides or more filling dishes (like a pie rather than a fish dish).

Maybe the pizza example is a bit of a red herring - you were out with friends, so maybe there was a cost/politeness issue in that they were happy to share a pizza so you felt you should too.
I'm curious what happens if you went out just the two of you, and ordered the exact same meal. Would he expect you to give him something off your plate because he needs more food than you? In other words, is he always comparing your plate and his and expecting to have more than you (=greedy), or is he happy if his plate is enough to sate him (=just large appetite)?

My 6’2” dh can easily eat twice as much as me. All without gaining excess.
We often split mains 50/50 but he would order himself an extra starter (soup/salad).

Being hungry and greedy is different isn't it? I can't eat what my husband eats but if we were sharing a pizza we would probably get some sides he would never leave me hungry or take more than his share, you need to speak up op your husband might not know you are still hungry.

'It becomes more of a problem when we are away and eating out and I feel that this is almost leading to a food disorder as I tend to pack secret cereal bars in my luggage as I worry about being left hungry.'
Can you just clarify this - i can see how in the pizza situation you ended up with less (even though I think its rude and uncaring of your DH not to check how much you needed and confused as to why you wouldnt order sides or a second pizza) but how would this happen with regular meals out, or are you always at tapas/sharing style places? If you both order main meals, does he just help himself to your food?

So when you cook do you not give yourself the amount of food that you want to eat?

My dh is about 4 stone heavier than me and does a more physical job, so yes he does eat quite a bit more than me. If we were eating out though we order what we want and think we can eat. In your circumstance if you knew it was going to be an issue you should’ve ordered more.

My dh is extremely tall and has a very fast metabolism. Compared to me he does obviously need way more food (I have a hearty appetite myself!) He also absolutely loves food and eats huge portions.
However, he is extremely kind and generous and would never see me be hungry. He would always offer/give me the last bit of food and go without himself if necessary etc.

So the problem with your scenario is not that your DH needs to eat a lot of food; either, it’s that he is selfish and not considering you, or you’ve made a martyr of yourself and he genuinely thinks you only need tiny amounts and doesn’t at all think you’re feeling hard done by.

You need to sit down and speak up for yourself! let him know about you carrying cereal bars as him taking some of your share of the food leaves you without having enough and feeling hungry still. Spell it out so that he is fully aware. If his behaviour then doesn’t change once he is aware then he is a selfish prick.

Not strange that he would need more food.
Very very strange that when you are away or out you have to pack snacks as you are not “left” with enough food. Why not just order enough that you both get enough food?

Regardless of appetite he is definitely a bit selfish and ill mannered if you are sharing something and he doesn’t check that you’ve got enough.

Well it's fine that he eats more than you - he's larger and has a greater appetite, that sounds normal. Also fine that he has a larger portion at home, assuming that whoever cooks is making enough to satisfy both appetites. My DP eats slightly more than me, but that's fine, I make enough for both of us, and just dish up a slightly larger plate for him.

But eating out is different. You should both be ordering what you need to fill you. So if you agree to share a pizza, he needs to know that he's only getting half (because you need half), so needs to order sides if he wants more. Alternatively, order a full pizza each, and you get a box to take half yours home.

It sounds like he's inconsiderate not just hungry

You shouldn't ever be in a position where you're needing to hide snacks or be hungry because of him

Dont share food with him, just order your own. Doesnt matter if the other couple are sharing!

There is no rule. I eat more than dh sometimes. For the pizza I would have asked him if half would be enough for him. I could easily eat one pizza myself but a half would be enough. Less than that I would have ordered a side.Why have you let him believe you need so little food?

My husband needs more calories than me to maintain a stable weight - he would lose eating what I eat

this is normal biology but somehow along the way people started seeing that as unfair

but yes was it enough ? And if not why didn’t you order some sides or puddings?

1/3 2/3 seems quite extreme split 55-45% would be in line with average calorie needs