Ashamed of the way DS is behaving

OP said they were acting like yobs, being intimidating. I was just pointing out the champagne as it sounded like he was trying to show off. Like a bunch of spoilt hooray Henrys. If they were just sitting there quietly drinking whatever and not posting it on SM it wouldn't be disruptive or look as bad.

MN just hates people having fun in public - especially if it's not "their" kind of fun.

No one is obliged to care whether you like them or behave accordingly you realize?

Is that what people hate? The champagne? I actively love a glass of bubbles. I very very rarely drink but I'd definitely have a glass of champagne on a train, I've a sister who works in hospitality and might actually have a bottle of bubbles on her on any given night out like this. I wouldn't even mind someone having a carry on over a few cans either though so maybe I'm just not easily bothered by people living their lives.

Yep - it's very clear you judge people, don't worry 😂

You’re quite at liberty to do so though. I judge people by my own standards all the time, it’s how I work out who I like and who I don’t.

Not aimed at me but I'm not remotely loud in real life and agree that they were just having a wee laugh and doing nothing overly unpleasant.

Yeah what an idiot. Flexing like he's so posh with a bottle of champagne on public transport. If you're that fancy why can't you afford an Uber?

Tell him that you're surprised as his employer or clients would be highly disapproving of him posting this stuff. He could seriously damage his career and professional reputation if he's not careful.

I mean there's no harm in having fun, but filming acting yobbish and publicly sharing it is immature at best.

Ach come on, they weren't fighting, being rude, addressing people negatively, throwing stuff, shouting and swearing or anything by the sounds of it.

I'm a 42 yr old professional and never really been one for that kind of group sillyness, more likely to be found giggling after a few glasses of wine while having a chat on a train but wouldn't be surprised or annoyed by that at all

Nope. I'm actually autistic and find loud noise incredibly stressful.

But I just wear my loops and let other people behave how they like - it's not up to me to judge their behaviour by my own standards.

Hopefully this reassured you. It sounds like they were friendly and inclusive, if loud. Not ideal, but not intimidating.

You’re loud in rl aren’t you 😁

I think I’m being tarred and feathered with the middle aged, middle class pearl clutching label - I was at a Lottery Winners gig on Friday (much alcohol consumed) and will be at Twickers on a double date (where we will absolutely be racking up the beers before heading home on the train). Difference is, we will not be swigging from champagne bottles on SWR (where it is not illegal) nor posting it to SM. I’ll be sure to leave the pearls at home too…

The OP was whether she should be ashamed of her DS - well, yes and no. Not the partying, but the possible lack of consideration for others in the carriage, yes. And she’s addressed this with him. The fact that a few of us have suggested OP gently suggests her DS consider the implications of such posts on his future career is not ‘judgey’, but cautionary. And stories on Insta can actually remain on the profile for more than 24 hours - it depends on how they have been saved and, as many of us have pointed out, whether followers have screen shotted or copied vids. Once you post on SM you really do not have control. It only takes one of his 70 followers to leak stuff. Many corporations are very unforgiving - several news articles about posts made by people when they are 14 cited to lose jobs at 19. As a family we have no SM/digital footprint as a result.

I was clearly reacting to the poster with sarcasm FFS

Like I said, it's a descriptor. Someone who likes to tut about anyone who behaves remotely out of their "norm".

On a train platform though? I don’t think that’s the place for high jinks.

He actually sounds really nice to reply to that intrusive nonsense so kindly with only an eye roll of his own. What a nice chap.

What is it then? I have no doubt people use the phrase as a derogatory term to describe women (not men) who have high standards of public behaviour and little to zero tolerance of people who foist their loudness on others. Also used to derogatorily describe women who disapprove when it comes to overly sexualised behaviour in public.

I thought you were going to say he was being racist or sexist or something, messing around on a night out with friends? Turning a cartwheel? Bit of music? Just sounds like they were having a laugh and not hurting anyone. I'd smile at the childish antics of people in their 20s enjoying themselves, sure haven't we all been young? I'd maybe, MAYBE roll my eyes at the loud music but shame?

Okay?

I just think MN has a tendency to hugely overreact to totally normal behaviour. People have been loud and daft in public since the dawn of time - it's not new and it's certainly nothing that needs to be judged and sneered at.

And here we go, with women tearing other women down, whilst defending arsehole young men behaving obnoxiously. Says it all about MN 🙄

No such thing as ‘private’ on SM, and anyone who thinks their stuff is truly private is deluded. Once it’s out there, you have no control over what your friends/acquaintances might do with it.

An ex or a ‘friend’ could easily screenshot something and send it to an employee to be malicious. Or not even being malicious, they might share something with another group, thinking it’s hilarious, and then it's uncontrollable. People get caught out with stuff like this all the time!

I think you’re deliberately missing the point btw

Me too. I’d rather clutch my pearls than be an anti social lout. It’s not cool to engage in public behaviour that could intimidate other users of the shared space. Keep your arsehole attitude for your own four walls.

It's not meant to be an insult, it's just a perfect descriptor of a lot of the posters on this thread.