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AIBU?

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Would you expect/would your family join in with the Tom foolery?

313 replies

Pissingitdownquelsurprise · 15/11/2025 22:02

Had parents and sibling and niece & nephew (late teens) over this weekend
Our Dc is 6 and bouncing all over the place talking to everyone, sibling and DN and DN are quiet people, which I get. Dd asking them if they wanted to play or trying to make conversation, no one really making any effort with her, so it always ends up being Dh and me running around playing with her, doing hide and seek and playing games etc. I totally get that they all probably don’t want to and it’s not much fun, but wouldn’t you give attention..,or at least talk to your little cousin/niece?

Felt a bit sorry for her as she was literally getting nothing back and loves them.

OP posts:
allthegoodusernameshavegone · 15/11/2025 22:27

I must admit I have zero interest in little kids but to be polite I do engage with them & will join in with there activities to a point, thats just good manners.

Pissingitdownquelsurprise · 15/11/2025 22:27

PrizedPickledPopcorn · 15/11/2025 22:26

Lively play isn’t always appropriate. It prevents other conversations happening. There’s nothing worse than rowdy play dominating a room where people are trying to talk and catch up with each other.

They weren’t though, they don’t really talk, she gets/keeps the conversation going 😂

OP posts:
AnImmenseDislikeOfPeople · 15/11/2025 22:26

I think it's a shame, and a bit rubbish, if no one is trying to engage with your DD.

However, perhaps controversially, I wonder if it is an issue with the type of games and attention required by your DD. I'm not sure running around and hide & seek are the best games for when people are visiting (unless there are other similar-aged children). Maybe if DD would play in the same room in a bit more of a calm way, the family would find it easier to engage with her.

Pissingitdownquelsurprise · 15/11/2025 22:26

Brefugee · 15/11/2025 22:24

if your DD was annoying me by bouncing around and pestering me? I'd tell her to go away, and probably leave if i got the impression you had invited me over to Behold The Wonder That Is Your Daughter instead of having a conversation with me.

But you sound nice!

OP posts:
PrizedPickledPopcorn · 15/11/2025 22:26

Lively play isn’t always appropriate. It prevents other conversations happening. There’s nothing worse than rowdy play dominating a room where people are trying to talk and catch up with each other.

Pissingitdownquelsurprise · 15/11/2025 22:25

Jigglyhuffpuff · 15/11/2025 22:25

I get round this with a "dn, can you teach dd how to play XYZ? She's never played it before" and then walk away before the sulky response

Yes, that’s a good idea

OP posts:
Pissingitdownquelsurprise · 15/11/2025 22:25

Brefugee · 15/11/2025 22:24

if your DD was annoying me by bouncing around and pestering me? I'd tell her to go away, and probably leave if i got the impression you had invited me over to Behold The Wonder That Is Your Daughter instead of having a conversation with me.

Wasn’t being annoying at all, talking/making conversation…having social skills really

OP posts:
Jigglyhuffpuff · 15/11/2025 22:25

I get round this with a "dn, can you teach dd how to play XYZ? She's never played it before" and then walk away before the sulky response

Brefugee · 15/11/2025 22:24

Pissingitdownquelsurprise · 15/11/2025 22:20

Wouldn’t it be nice if they showed interest/asked questions though, as an auntie in particular or does it not matter?

if your DD was annoying me by bouncing around and pestering me? I'd tell her to go away, and probably leave if i got the impression you had invited me over to Behold The Wonder That Is Your Daughter instead of having a conversation with me.

Bloodyscarymary · 15/11/2025 22:22

Yes they sound quite dull! I’m sorry. But there’s nothing you can really do is there, just have to seek out adults and friends/family who are loving and attentive.

Pissingitdownquelsurprise · 15/11/2025 22:20

Wouldn’t it be nice if they showed interest/asked questions though, as an auntie in particular or does it not matter?

OP posts:
Gowlett · 15/11/2025 22:18

Some people just don’t know how to play. I imagine teens being too self-conscious to join in kids games. My DS is very lively & chatty, loves being around adults. But they don’t always respond favourably to him, especially if having conversations.

Echobelly · 15/11/2025 22:14

Would depend on my mood. Historically I don't look forward to doing that kind of thing with small kids, including my own, but I found I did enjoy it when I let myself do it. I think by and large, children your DD's age are blessedly unaware of older people not wanting to engage - they might be upset by it in peers but I'm not sure they feel massively rejected in adults/older children don't want to take part.