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Original poster

To allow DD to buy this 'obscene' top?

390 replies

maggie2k · 14/11/2025 23:35

DD14 just lost 10kg, went down from 62 to 52kg (she's pretty petite, only 160 cm tall) and wants to buy herself this top since she's now at a healthy weight for her age and was putting off buying new tops earlier because she didn't want them to stop fitting her: https://www.victoriassecret.co.uk/style/su826145/w96067

My sister thinks it's 'obscene' and a 'lingerie ad' as well as 'something she saw on social media' which is complete nonsense because she uses one of those granny flip phones and isn't on social media except discord, spotify and IRC (no idea if those count)

I don't see the problem honestly, there's nothing obscene about lingerie if you ask me in the 1st place, and VS has always made clothes

This is a photo of the top in the colour she wants it:

To allow DD to buy this 'obscene' top?
OP posts:
ThankGodItsAutumn · 15/11/2025 08:32

I'd probably try and gently encourage her to find something similar purely because I really dislike obvious branding of any variety, but it's not obscene and it's certainly not a hill I would die on.

StringersBell · 15/11/2025 08:29

VS may do underwear but for her generation they do so much more. As others have said it’s now all about their perfume and bags…my DD similar age loves their stuff and doesn’t own any lingerie : undies from there. It really isn’t the same brand to them as it is to older people who still only associate it with lingerie

TheQuirkyMaker · 15/11/2025 08:25

It's not obscene in itself but EVERYONE knows what VS symbolizes. It is sending a very "adult" message- is that the message a youngster wants to sent to all and sundry?

JamesClyman · 15/11/2025 08:18

Your sister's an idiot.

It's hardly obscene. A free advert for VS, yes but obscene?????

Soontobe60 · 15/11/2025 08:15

I’d be telling my DD that this isn’t a designer top as such, it’s an advertising ploy by VS, akin to carrying a Tesco carrier bag 😂 and as such is a rip off when she can get a pack of 2 nice grey T shirts from H+M for a tenner, thus saving herself £15 to buy another item.
https://www2.hm.com/en_gb/productpage.1212805004.html

SweetnsourNZ · 15/11/2025 08:14

BelleEpoque27 · 14/11/2025 23:39

I suppose you could argue that a 14 year old advertising a lingerie brand on her chest isn't ideal. I doubt my mum would have let me wear it in the 90s.

But no, it's not obscene. It's just a grey top with a logo. I wouldn't have a problem with it.

Remember in the late 80s my mum refusing to let me wear a pink t shirt advertising the perfume Tramp that was all the rage. I did see her point but it was a bit ironic as she bought me the actual perfume for my birthday.

Alittlefrustrated · 15/11/2025 08:10

I imagine it makes her feel a bit grown up/risque. If she can achieve that with such a modest item, I'd consider that a win!.

JoWilkinsonsno1fan · 15/11/2025 08:09

Tell your sister to get stuffed its nothing to do with her - why are you even considering her view on this?

The top is fine and I am sure your DD will look lovely in it. Buy the top!!

MyLimeGuide · 15/11/2025 08:08

Well im just totally impressed a 14 year old can pull off that weightloss! 🥰 she deserves her top!

SweetnsourNZ · 15/11/2025 08:08

It's just a t shirt. It will probably be worn under a cardigan or sweatshirt most of the time anyway and be discarded for something new in no time anyway.

Thebigonesgetaway · 15/11/2025 08:04

Your sister has some issues, it’s just a T-shirt that advertises a brand who do yes lingerie but also, well T-shirts, perfume etc.

Middlechild3 · 15/11/2025 08:02

Its just a t shirt. My objection would be over paying to buy something that then advertises the company with the brand name, and not just because its a lingerie brand.

Imisscoffee2021 · 15/11/2025 08:02

It's not obscene, Victoria's secret is associated with lingerie though rather than day wear so it's a brand I wouldn't have thought of having in diamanté on the front of a plain tee. It's a very conservative tee otherwise.

Blanknotebook · 15/11/2025 08:00

I really don’t see anything wrong with it. She has worked for her money and so let her spend it on something she likes. My Mother never allowed me to dress in fashionable things like my friends, and so I always felt like the odd one out.

Friendlyfart · 15/11/2025 08:00

I thought it was going to be a crop top w an awful slogan This is fine.

Imdunfer · 15/11/2025 07:59

Are 14 year olds not allowed to like nice underwear these days? I've had a look at the site and it's clearly marketing at young teens with a pink candy stripe bra and full size pants set on the home page. I've never seen a more body covering pair of pants. Your sister is way out of date!

Cnidarian · 15/11/2025 07:59

It's hardly a Cradle of Filth shirt is it?! I think your sister needs less of a voice...

TwinklyRoseTurtle · 15/11/2025 07:59

I’d be more concerned about the 10kg weightloss- your daughter was only just over healthy range before she lost weight

FreshAirandSunshine · 15/11/2025 07:58

Kindly, your sister needs to butt out. Your daughter is 14, able to wear clothes she’s always wanted to whilst adapting to her new body, and the most extreme thing she’s chosen to wear is a grey T-shirt with a tiny logo on it.

CautiousLurker2 · 15/11/2025 07:58

maggie2k · 14/11/2025 23:38

All it says is 'victoria's secret' and because she's petite it'll also be longish looking on her

She goes to a private girls school with no uniform so has been buying a lot of new clothes lately

Like others I don’t think this is obscene and also tend to eyeroll at VS - but I’d check the school rules re slogans and advertising if she wants to wear it there? My DCs went ti a ‘non-uniform’ but coed private school where political slogans/bad language/provocative imagery on clothing etc were not allowed. Just check that advertising a lingerie brand doesn’t fly to close to the criteria if she wants to wear it there - though being single sex and advertising a women/girls’ product may be fine.

ETA I’d be wary of banning anything as innocuous as a T-shirt, as your DD may up the anti with another far more provocative item from the VS catalogue…

Coconutter24 · 15/11/2025 07:56

Arlanymor · 14/11/2025 23:42

Yep guess so, I'm 46 so maybe not well-equipped to answer this post, sorry!

Show quote history

It’s not advertising underwear, it’s a T-shirt that has a brand on

IVbumble · 15/11/2025 07:54

Is her name Victoria?

MyIvyGrows · 15/11/2025 07:52

Callwaiting2025 · 15/11/2025 00:31

When I was 17 I used to wear a bright yellow, fairly loose crop top that I bought in Spain with the words "Sugar Baby Doll" on it - and it was split down both sides low enough to reveal my bra. It was sooo tacky and awful, but I loved that top.

OPs daughter's taste looks quite tame in comparison.

Edited
Show quote history

I had a black cropped t shirt with a topless manga-style girl holding two bloodied knives 🤣 I loved it, everyone hated it including a lot of my friends, never mind teachers and parents.

Imissgoldengrahams · 15/11/2025 07:48

ClementinesForChristmas · 14/11/2025 23:46

As someone old enough to remember the Playboy logo being fashionable, YANBU OP. it’s not exactly stylish, but let the teen think she’s being grown up and sexy (she’ll cringe in a few years).

Yeah I used to wander round with the playboy bunny on my bum with the lowest low riser velvet trousers possible Grin
Not seeing an issue with this t shirt

Goditsmemargaret · 15/11/2025 07:48

Well done to your daughter for losing weight when so many young people are struggling in this area now. How wonderful she's feeling good and buying new clothes.

I cannot fathom how wearing a grey t-shirt is controversial in any way.

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