To think your Baby Registry list should be limited after #1

I think she might mean Peter rabbit crockery which is a traditional christening gift

I got so so so many teddies and they are just gathering dust!

That list of gifts is interesting to me, because in the US, most baby shower attendees go for practical over sentimental. They might put a teddy bear along with something like bibs or bottles or burp cloths, but the purpose of a shower is more oriented around the things the baby needs, as opposed to things that make nice gifts but aren’t essential. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone get pottery - what do people do with it? Is it purely decorative?

This sounds more like it that the list would reduce with each kid!

I could genuinely name the things we've been gifted when babies arrived...2-3 packs of onesies, same with outfits, some muslins, 6 or 7 homemade blankets (which is a lot tbh, i guess a registry would have avoided this!!), a smattering of cuddly toys, and a nice teether. I'm really certain that's it. Was very grateful for all of it, never occured to me someone else might buy a car seat or pram! That must have felt wonderful. I've since gifted some of my big items to a family member as I thought we were done, turns out I was premature on that one!! Oops.

Well, I'm just going to repeat everyone else:
What?!
I've never heard of a baby registry or a baby wishlist. Ever.

It's never awkward to say no.
Woman up!

I have heard of this but only in Internet articles about CF'ers. When I had my first baby, our parents bought us big things, in laws bought us the car seat and my parents bought us cot bedding and the changing table and mat. Most other people bought us an outfit each which we were extremely grateful for, especially the ones in bigger sizes as ds1 was nearly 9lbs and born in July so he only wore vests in newborn size. With ds2 we just needed a double buggy which we bought with the sure start grant and a new mattress for the cot. Ds3 was born in winter so needed warmer clothing and a snow suit which we bought him and ds4 was born early so he needed smaller baby clothes. Ds5 had a new car seat because ds4 was still in the baby one. We didn't expect anyone to buy us anything although we were grateful to those who did. I would have been miffed to recieve a list from someone. I love going into next or asda and spending ages choosing some baby clothes for a new baby in the family.

I'm in my mid 30's, have friends with children from teens right through to about 1 month old. Haven't ever been sent a registry. Have been to two baby showers, one for an American and one other about a decade ago, but neither time had a registry.

Same as some others have said, if I worked in an office then it was common to do a whip round and get vouchers for mamas and papas or a pregnancy massage or something, but didn't do this outside of work.

Astounding how different norms can be amongst friendship circles. Mostly I have friends in London, the south east, south west and Wales...So quite a geographical range. I guess most of my mates are 34+, maybe that's the difference?

What culture are you from then, whereby you make a list of what items you want your acquaintances to buy you for your baby?
Because in my ‘culture’, they’re not a thing. My children are both of the age whereby they and their friends are having babies - they’ve never heard of this either.
Most people when attending a baby shower will buy a cute blanket, a small cuddly bear, some item of pottery with Peter Rabbit on it or a lovely book for the baby. Colleagues at work might club together and get a gift voucher.

@Notagain75i was given one for an online pandemic baby shower! But it is an international couple neither living in home country so I let them off the hook and bought a book from their list

Interestingly I didn’t want to do one for my baby shower that friends kindly wanted to host but they insisted as everyone wanted to get something I really needed rather than tat I might not like or need

Oh and I also don’t know anyone who had a gender reveal event where other people were invited, though I do have an old friend on Facebook who posted about one they had. But none of my friends or family have ever had one.

My niece had a small baby shower type gathering and asked attendees to give a book they enjoyed as a child or one they had enjoyed reading with their own baby/small child. It was lovely to see them and her baby had a ready made little library - which has gone on to be enjoyed by her subsequent children.

I find the whole concept tacky and grasping whether its first or tenth baby

I’m in my 20s, have two toddlers and lots of friends having babies. I have never heard of anyone having a registry. I don’t think this is necessarily generational, as I can’t even think of one person I’ve heard of having one except for on mumsnet!!

I did have a “baby shower” that my close friends (very kindly!) insisted on doing - it was very much not like how baby showers seem in the US though. It was just my group of friends from school who clubbed together and bought me a basket of lovely baby clothes, and we sat and had a cup of tea as I looked through it all. We didn’t invite anyone else, and I didn’t ask for any specific presents (or any presents at all!) and there certainly wasn’t any decorations or any faff like that

No one should have a baby registry list!
If someone wants to buy a present for a new baby that's lovely but I have never heard of a baby registry list and would ignore it if I was given one.

Your WHAT now?

I agree with you as they should have kept the first lot of presents and baby stuff! Some people host baby ‘sprinkles’ for little top up gifts but if someone kindly hosted that for me I wouldn’t ask for anything I think, except if pushed then maybe consumables

This is a good point. One present I received from my boss at work was something I’d never have thought of but turned out to be SO Useful & much better than the item I’d originally bought.

I am old, and just think WTAF.

I’m also grandmother to five girls and young women, and if any one of them was tacky enough to pull this crap, they would be, to use an appropriate American phrase, fucking SOL (shit out of luck).

I'm in London and early 40s. Several friends and family members have had babies in the last couple of years and I've never heard of this. Sounds like an awful American import - tacky and grabby.

https://littlewishlist.com/products/john-lewis/

part of the problem comes when people buy a pink pram for their PFB daughter and then feel embarrassed to put child 2 -a son- in it.

Coming at this from an historical point of view

In the same way that people would give essentials to newly-weds, because it's a lot to put together all at once and in a small subsistence community it makes economic sense for everyone to chip in for everyone else in turn

so we make sure the basics are all covered and nobody inadvertently gives the same as someone else (because that would be a waste)

Then as the community gets a bit bigger and looser the making-sure becomes formalised, and you get a wedding list; held first by the bride's mother then at its peak by one's favourite shop

And at the same time pre-marital arrangements are loosened, and material goods become relatively cheaper; so couples don't feel the necessity any more but people who grew up with this still want to continue it. Consequently wedding gifts become either "something lovely and thoughtful and personal" (which really wasn't the tradition) or a contribution to the cost of house or honeymoon.

Similarly, I imagine that the communities that initiated baby showers were spreading the economic load. It's only "grabby" if you receive but never contribute. And a gift list is the sensible thing to do to ensure that people don't - to give a PP's example - get a different outfit for every day of the first six months but no blankets.

...Having said all that, yes I agree that putting a pram on the list for a second baby is a sign of an over-affluent society. And I wouldn't call something that costs £60 simply to attend a "sprinkle".

I'm 37 and had a baby this year. In my circle you get the baby a cute outfit or a nice book after it's born and the pram is either the one you've already got from your older child or from marketplace. Grandparents bought our second hand pram. I wouldn't spend more than 20 quid on a friend's baby! We all have decent jobs so it's not a money thing.

I had my babies 19 and 16 years ago baby showers were not a thing then although I had heard of them from watching Friends and SATC,
I got cards and presnts after they were born
We didn't have Gender reveal parties either because frankly nobody apart thecparents really care whether the baby is a boy or a girl
I have noticed they have become a thing over the past 10 years maybe ?
Never heard of a baby register .