To think perhaps my son isn’t autistic but instead modern society is too challenging for him to cope with.

I think something can be an innate brain difference and yet also be either a disability or neutral/useful depending on the environment. To me the "severity" of ASD/ADHD/ND conditions is essentially a question of "how many environments that actually exist in the world could this person still function in", which isn't a pure spectrum as it varies by the person and their needs/preferences.

I think my brain works differently from other people's but I've been very lucky to have had my life structured in a way that usually minimises any effects. Only very occasionally I get out of this routine and realise how very much it is helping me.

Yes . The education system plus the almost complete loss of child freedom plays a role.

Just one example...erosion of playtime breaks and the stripping of play from year 1 and 2....

Children dont get to physically move enough ! They are forced to sit still too much and focus for toonlong on formal learning each day

This is why we have a massive mh crisis among all children and of course Nd kids struggle even more

Year 6 for example. Incredibly stressful snd pressured for schools teachers and all children despite there being no need for this at all..sats literally ruin the last year of primary. Out of 32 children some hugely struggle in the busy stressed classroom but no resources to give them separate spaces and pressure to get them through sats

My 11 year old is autistic. She desperately wants to be at mainstream secondary but the one size fits all approach is absolutely impossible for her.

Within 3 weeks of starting secondary she is unable to attend!! Its horrific for her and for us

I actually dont know what her options would nave been 25 years ago i dont think ahe would ever have coped

But the strict rigidity of the day the lack of breaks or any flexibility. Make it impossible for many kids

You are completely wrong.ADHD is under diagnosed and under treated in this country as highlighted by the NHS ADHD task force. It’s a national disgrace.

www.england.nhs.uk/long-read/report-of-the-independent-adhd-taskforce-part-1/

I'll also say secondary schools dictating that kids must always wear blazers is nuts and probably doesn't help kids either.

I remember kids carrying them because they didn't like wearing them, or just general comfort of being too hot.
I dred my youngest going to secondary. I think I'm doing well if he'll put a fleece on.

I think the presumption of mainstream here in scotland has made things much worse. The level of need in classes is getting higher each year. Children with severe behaviour issues, non verbal etc. Our primary have had to install new security to stop kids escaping because they are high risk for bolting, climbing etc.

Huge resources are going to a few very high need individuals leaving very little support for the other children with ASN. Years ago my autistic child would have been in a special school. Now they are one of the forgotten ones struggling in mainstream with no support due to higher needs children that constantly disrupt learning. It's a system that doesn't benefit anyone.

I gather part of the reason is that therr are so many high medical needs children surviving that wouldn't have in the past. So special schools are full of very complex needs and everyone gets pushed up a level.

Everything is shouting, everything is flashing. Modern world is occasionally very much an attack on most senses
This over and over. We are harassed almost 24/24 by noise at decibel levels that especially small brains can cope with.

The constant shouting, screeching, loud music...which leads to the vicious circle of upping it up compared to others. Adults have grown used to it and so do kids....except that inside, their brains are shouting that they can't cope.

I think the modern world definitely affects children so much more.
My son is nearly 3 and has some delays, perhaps autistic I don't know yet, he has been recently referred.
But when my son watches tv he stims, runs around in circles and he cannot focus at all.
When he's screen free you think he's 💯 normal development to such an extent that his nursery manager was confused as to whether to refer him.
He was screen free all summer, and when he went back, she said he's completely different, social, engaged, started talking,
And I allowed the tv to back in, and she then said a few weeks later, I might as well refer just in case, and for the last few weeks hes been screen free again
And she keeps saying how focused and social he is again.
I hear in America they are looking into virtual autism but I haven't heard much talk in the UK about that.
I'm inclined to think that children with autism are just affected way more by screens and yet somehow they are the ones who seem to use screens the most!

In my capacity as an HE first year course lead I’ve advised many a student who is struggling to get off as much online stuff as possible. Walk in the park and read a book. Quieten all this ‘noise’ of modern life.

OP, do as much as you can to quieten his life. But I don’t think you’re wrong .

I wonder, with your updates, if it's that there is more about modern life that 'triggers' people with autism rather than people having a normal reaction to sensory bombardment.
You're right about the magazines, we didn't have that in my day. There was less to 'nag' our parents for.
With my own kids though I could tell them no and once they got to school age it was no big deal. Not because I'm some amazing parent but because they were/are neurotypical. I would suggest if this causes absolute scenes with a 7 year old there may well be more at play than a neuro typical child wanting something they can't have.

I think unless a person has severe autism they could have probably got by in life reasonably well in the past. But not now, everything is so chaotic and complicated with demands in every aspect of life. Even schools now are so rigid with so many rules, specific ways of doing things, a rushed busy curriculum, jam packed calendar of events and trips, so many passwords and log ins to remember for online learning. Even I as a NT adult find it overwhelming.

Why do you write that? I’m in my late 50s and as far as I’m concerned what my DS17 is expected to do/get through is way more than what I experienced in the 80s. I’m not talking about parental expectations, but societal and school expectations.

He is bombarded with emails from school, unis, his sport organisation. I just turned up to activities. We had paper letters to take home which were far easier to deal with than scrolling around trying to find emails. The whole thing is just more, more, more.

It's an inate brain difference
It's both, but I believe the expansive increase in the last few years is due to the other factor whilst the numbers that are caused by chemical imbalances remain stable.

I think we were happier just to let children fail at school and just describe them as bad, fidgety, away with the fairies, slow etc and then they'd head off to work younger not having learned much.

I think there is something about 'screens" but not tv, specifically doom scrolling tiktok/YouTube and certain games that are carefully designed to attention grab, combined with lack of sleep which could mimic adhd and cause anxiety..

Op I agree with you there is something overwhelming about schools. I think I'm NT but I am dyslexic

I think its the classrooms are smaller. Less space between groups. The bright chairs not boring gray. It just seems busier.

Same with shops. I hate Asda and M&S food shops. I avoid when possible. I don't mind Tesco or Sainsburys.
I think its asiles are narrow and too busy. Bit like schools, just too busy.

Mine was diagnosed in secondary. I’m absolutely not convinced. Traits, yes. But full diagnosis, nope. And I think they’d not have had any bother when schools weren’t so autocratic.

Imho it's the mildly ADHD who got caught on screens extremely (bit wuirky, bit disruptive, still ok most of the time id that makes sense, like me). NT people have issues, so if you are even step off, it becomes a problem.
I waa diagnosed with ADHD in 90s as a kid. After a lot of work with my parents and doctors (no meds) I was basically better functioning than "normal" people.
Screens and instant gratification are a problem as you say. My concentration is so much worse.

Plus, the world is so noisy and distracting now. Studies do support that the world got noisier. Everything is shouting, everything is flashing. Modern world is occasionally very much an attack on most senses. I watched some kid's series with nieces and nephews. Why is everyone in it shouting? Ours were mute or normal volume talking. Actually calming. It starts early.

As someone who is ND (diagnosed ADHD but I suspect AuADHD - not been diagnosed) modern life is way way more difficult to cope with. It has a rigidity and pace that’s impossible to cope with. At school (80s/early 90s) I was possibly just a little quirky. Now I’d definitely be diagnosed and probably have all sorts of special measures to cope with things.

There’s nothing wrong with ND, it just doesn’t fit well into modern life I think most of the symptoms are the stress of this

I don't think the increase in adhd is a surprise when children, at an ever growing younger age, are increasingly more exposed to mental and physical stimuli. They little minds are constantly stimulated with external triggers. They already have to concentrate on so much to just learn the normal childhood stages, but it's no enough.

Children nowadays don't know what silence is. They don't know what boredom is (ie. a time to be left with your thoughts and develop creative skills). Parents encourage a constant buzzing environment and even feel guilty when they don't.

Kids grow to be overwhelmed, fight against it and bingo, they have adhd. And whilst interventions are put in place to try to manage the 'crisis' times, the kids continue to be overstimulated, sadly often even more as they are yet thrown into a world of even more interventions.

Kids need calm timrs to recuperate and grow healthily.

I don't think the increase in adhd is a surprise when children, at an ever growing younger age, are increasingly more exposed to mental and physical stimuli. They little minds are constantly stimulated with external triggers. They already have to concentrate on so much to just learn the normal childhood stages, but it's no enough.

Children nowadays don't know what silence is. They don't know what boredom is (ie. a time to be left with your thoughts and develop creative skills). Parents encourage a constant buzzing environment and even feel guilty when they don't.

Kids grow to be overwhelmed, fight against it and bingo, they have adhd. And whilst interventions are put in place to try to manage the 'crisis' times, the kids continue to be overstimulated, sadly often even more as they are yet thrown into a world of even more interventions.

Kids need calm timrs to recuperate and grow healthily.

Completely. It’s obviously better that kids aren’t just written off as being thick now. However it is a shame that there is this pressure for everyone to be able to achieve.

That is a very stereotypical way to describe Autism. My DD can mask for the best, you wouldn't know she has it.

Absolutely no developmental delays unless you count the inability to read social cues.
She stimms mainly at home because this is where she feels safe.

They absolutely are being over diagnosed. This will be the shame of the decade, in years to come. We're not helping our young or society by over diagnosing.

I agree.
Of course there are many kids/adults who have ADHD regardless of screens, but I think there is a significant proportion of kids whose ability to concentrate and focus has been destroyed by screen exposure.

I can even see it in myself. I’ve taken to watching YouTube Shorts, and now I definitely find it harder to sit and watch a whole TV programme, because my brain is expecting a new film every couple of minutes. I’m a 58 year old professional, so of course I know this is easily reversible for me, but I don’t think the same could be said for developing young brains. Children who spend their days watching TikToks are going to find it hard to suddenly sit in a class focussing quietly on maths.

Actually, this post sums it up far better than I did! Powerful stuff - and absolutely true.