To think if you earn this, it doesn’t matter your circumstances, you’re still bloody privileged?!

I wouldn’t call it “privileged” unless she somehow obtains that income through some sort of handout. Is she not working to earn it?

If you don’t want to buy her a coffee, don’t offer.

Do you mean post tax pay? (That is what I understand by ‘take home pay’ .)

Not in the UK it's not £70000 is about £4200ish per month

Minimum wage is roughly £23000 about £1600 per month or £3200 for two.

I'm assuming your sister needs school wrap around care to be able to work, that alone would be 80 a week in term time never mind anything in school holidays.....

I don't think she sounds privileged, I think she sounds tight,

Tell her to buy her own coffee.

absolutely it does. very hard to swallow

I get £143 a month cm. I'm lucky I get that, he was offering me £50! CF. (My ex, not you.) 😊

It's not that from my point of view, I have a sister who is a higher earner but single whole the rest of us have partners and kids. She actually does contribute a lot and travel a fair bit but I tend to think she should be more frugal as she has noone to fall back on. It also can mean if she treats someone she's treating several people while treating her back is only treating one.

It sounds like op is in a similar income bracket to her sister but seems to think SHE is worse off when it really isn't the case.

Like I said, on the face of it, her salary is considered good but how well off she feels very much depends on her outgoings as well as her ability to manage finances in general 😊

Whilst that's clearly an above average salary, I can easily imagine that it doesn't leave very much spare cash for luxuries. The household mortgage or rent is the the same regardless of whether it's one adult or two in the household, bills aside from food will be the same, she's paying for child care expenses and presumably also for all extra curricular activities for the child. I do think she's wise not to be splurging on gifts for adult family members, but I can see your point that it's irritating that she's accepting ice creams and coffee paid for by you and never reciprocating. I think you just have to stop paying for things for her.

I think privilege is the wrong word for it. Leaving aside extremes of wealth or deprivation at either end or extremes of neglect or overparenting, or SEND or health issues, people can make what they wish of their lives. You can choose to identify and pursue a career you enjoy or find stimulating and reap the rewards. Sadly I know a few people whose relatively dull and poor lives are the result of simple inertia and lack of drive. Not everyone is a victim of circumstance. More ownership of our choices would be a good thing, instead of calling the results of good ones "privilege".

Yeah it's a pretty good wage.

After mortgage she'll have £3500 to pay bills.

BUT being the sole earner and responsible must weigh heavily.

She should still buy the coffee occasionally!

I am on similar and if I was on my own with DC I would be fine but not have loads extra especially I would need to cover extra childcare as well to enable me to work

Shocked at the previous posters who are unable to do simple maths. It absolutely is not less than two people earning NMW. It's significantly more.

However that said I don't think she is privileged, she probably feels a lot of stress being the only earner. Stop doing coffees, gifts etc if you feel they aren't being fairly reciprocated. It's a shame to have this opinion of your own sister.

Yes a lot of posts assuming what the person has to pay for and roughly how much

apologies ,i should have asked that poster instead where they got the childcare plus mortgage costs as being 75% seeing as the poster has said nothing about childcare costs (only mortgage payments ,child support and take home pay.)

yes it’s not loads of CM but we definitely don’t spend more than that on each of our two Really?? You don't spend more than that to house, feed, clothe, pay childcare etc?! Maybe you work opposite shifts or something but obviously that isn't an option to a single parent. It's really hard to be a lone parent which you clearly have no understanding of.

People are acting as if she has £4200 to spend. She has full time nursery and mortgage to pay for out of that will everything else. Nursery would wipe a big chunk of the £4200

Can you not just look at my post?

You replied and quoted it but don't seem to have actually read the full thing

The 75 per cent was just something I replied to from someone else but that is in my post that you actually replied to but at the same time haven't read

Yes it’s a lot of money and I wish I could take home that much! I’m also a single parent to one child, have a mortgage and other usual bills. I take home £2.3k and can barely get by.

what is the idea of the 75% figure for?

So? The end result is that they end up with a salary that gives them a comfortable lifestyle. They chose to work their way up and a lot of the time in those cases it’s because they’re doing something they love and feel passionate about, which is a privilege in itself when there are other people who not only earn a lot less but hate their jobs but work because they have to get by and just about make ends meet.

I’m not saying anyone on a comfortable income is entitled, but they are privileged and especially so if they came from a background that made it easy for them.

the £250 is towards all expenses for a child its a pitiful amount

a two bed flat/house isn't half the costs than a three/four bed place on average, you are not using half the electric/gas or half on shopping it does not work out like that spreading costs over more people works out cheaper

Regardless of how skint, rich, or otherwise she feels - on a salary of £70k she can certainly afford to stump up for her own coffees and ice creams, so don’t sub her any more.

I have got the figure from working out what 75 per cent of that £4200 figure is.