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AIBU?

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Original poster

To have a boyfriend stay at weekends - DS age 17

40 replies

Ceci693 · 13/11/2025 15:04

So it looks like I might have a “boyfriend” - seems a bit of a weird name at my age lol/ but he lives 3 hours away and thinking ahead - is it unfair to my DS who is 17 and lives at home with me - he’s in school- to have this man stay over at weekends. I’ve never brought a man back to the house before - have always managed with hotels or his place. DS says he doesn’t mind but I don’t want to upset his routine etc or make him feel pushed out in any way. Maybe I should stick to my rule of not bringing a man home. Wwyd?

OP posts:
Pandorea · 13/11/2025 15:54

I have children around this age and they have girlfriends to stay sometimes. Not sure why it shouldn’t work both ways if everyone’s happy. If your son is saying he’s ok with it then I’d definitely give it a try one weekend and see if he does cope with it. It sounds like you’re being super sensitive to your son’s needs and that you’d pick up if he wasn’t happy.

Idontjetwashthefucker · 13/11/2025 15:48

How long have you been together?

LittleJustice · 13/11/2025 15:48

Personally I do not see the problem with it as long as your son is fine with it.

Might be nice for him to have another man around the place actually

NorWouldTilly · 13/11/2025 15:46

Luckily your children are old enough to be left alone at home if you decide to spend some weekends at a hotel with your beau …

(And it isn’t really the same thing with your DD and her BF - no one’s depending on them …)

Luckyingame · 13/11/2025 15:44

I don't take young people's corner, very rarely. However, this is your kid and the situation could be damaging.
No to the "boyfriend".

Original poster
Ceci693 · 13/11/2025 15:22

Yeh definitely not every weekend just the odd one maybe. I’ll see but thanks

OP posts:
Thumbcat · 13/11/2025 15:18

I have similar circumstances. I’d say it’s fine for him to stay over but not every weekend.

Original poster
Ceci693 · 13/11/2025 15:14

Thanks for the positive story @RedReci guess I’ll see how it goes

OP posts:
RedRec · 13/11/2025 15:12

I have a long distance 'boyfriend' and I am 63. He first started coming to stay when my children were 18 and 16. They were nothing but happy for me. Their father, my ex husband, had moved on with someone else and I think they were glad for me to have someone too. I was far from lonely beforehand but I think they were worried that I might be.
Your son sounds lovely. Go for it, OP.

Original poster
Ceci693 · 13/11/2025 15:12

noidea69 · 13/11/2025 15:10

What's the long term plan with someone who lives 3 hours away?

Well would you just not bother . Am happy with seeing him once a week or fortnight for now 🤣

OP posts:
Original poster
Ceci693 · 13/11/2025 15:11

Yeh. Thats my thinking as well tbh. Only thing that rankles a little is that dd has had her boyfriend stay many times 🤣and I have faced this exact thing - coming out of bathroom and meeting him !!!

OP posts:
noidea69 · 13/11/2025 15:10

What's the long term plan with someone who lives 3 hours away?

Upyoucome · 13/11/2025 15:08

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Original poster
Ceci693 · 13/11/2025 15:08

Ok

OP posts:
QuietCorner · 13/11/2025 15:07

Stick to the rule