The dreaded Christmas dinner

That's exactly what I would do!

Hope you have a lovely Christmas.
We always stay at home for Christmas Day and visit or host in the days before or after.
Best of all worlds.

Although in your situation, I might be tempted to accept an invitation to lunch - a 30 minute drive would be less than the time I would spend cooking, and it would mean we could have a more relaxed morning with the Dc without worrying about peeling potatoes etc.

If you have children, definitely stay home in your own house. It’s not fair on them otherwise. Tell both sets of parents the are welcome to come to you, and if that doesn’t work for them, then tough!

Just do what YOU want to do, Once I had kids they became my priority at Christmas. Which meant staying at home in our own little bubble. Plenty of other days over the break to visit family.

Tell both sides you’re staying at home having enjoyed it so much last year and that you will see one side on Xmas Eve and the other Boxing Day. Sorted.

This. Alternate or go when you are single.

Once you have your children go start of December to one and start of January to the other and then have Christmas in your own home.

Don't split the day, you're right it's not fair on the kids (or anyone TBF)
Flip a coin if you must but pick a side or just stay home on your own and see them another day 🤣
That's what we do with two young ones now... Avoid the drama!

They will just have to be upset. It’s your Christmas too, and your three children should be the priority.

Tell them all to piss off. Just do what you want. This is why I despise Christmas - it’s a tinsel-covered turd lobbed at everyone every 12 months.

Accept all invites then fake an illness and stay home

I hope you have a lovely Christmas and well done for doing what is right for your little family.

Stay at home. Don't alternate years.

If you really want to see both tell them both you can't come and whoever is more gracious gets the visit 😅.

These are your children's Christmases, where would they have a nicer time?

Do you all live close by? Hire a church/village hall or similar, ask everyone to bring a dish (might need a bit of organisation), get a 2 - 3 trustworthy guests to deal with party games/music, kids games. Hire cleaners for Boxing Day. Ask both sets of parents/other relatives for contributions. If you ask them for ideas make sure they don't overlap to avoid arguments.
Retire to the couch with the phone/email nearby until Christmas.

This in spades. Say don’t want to upset anyone and everyone welcome to come to us for say a buffet Christmas eve, or come round to see DC Christmas morning or a buffet on boxing day but decided to stay home on Christmas Day.

I would do exactly this - it’s Christmas for you too.

We are also in this rut of alternating families on both Xmas day and boxing day. It drove me nuts for so long we now do Xmas at home on 24th or 27th depending what else is going on, and just treat 25th and 26th like going to someone’s house for a big lunch. It’s definitely taken the pressure off.

I would start by considering if you (as a family) prefer to visit for Christmas or not. If you do, pick one (toss a coin if there's no clear winner) and alternate.

If you prefer not to visit, then tell both sets that your hosting your own Christmases, but you'd love to see them on Christmas Eve/Boxing Day/ NYE/for a Christmas show/whatever. You can also choose a three way rotation. There is no magic answer.

I would not be darting between houses on Christmas day because I would not enjoy that at all. It will feel rushed, you're still "denying" one set of parents the prime Christmas meal spot, and there's a fair chance of things screwing up so you end up way too late at the last house or you forget one set of presents or you leave a DC's favourite gift behind at the first house and they're inconsolable at the next, etc

I'd stay home with my children who want to be at home for Christmas.

If grandparents live nearby, offer one Christmas Eve, one Boxing Day. Or invite them to yours. But I wouldn't be dragging my young children round to both houses on the day.

dont go to either. Do your own xmas

We don’t get invited by anyone & we’re quite easy going & children are well behaved. You’re lucky to be so popular & in demand! We have offered to host but nobody wants to come either 🤷🏻‍♀️

Neither! Stay at home and enjoy the day with your children and husband.
This comes from a mum that prior to my child's second birthday spent every christmas with my parents. Selfish to some...but I want to see my child enjoy christmas with me and dad, I dont eant to have to drag him away from his presents to visit x y and z.
We have an open door, more than welcome to visit us, come for dinner etc however I am not leaving my home whilst I have a young child/ believer.

This. Let your children have Christmas in their own home

We have young children and have Christmas Day at home. Both sets of parents welcome, sometimes they come, mostly they don’t (we have lots of siblings). We spend Christmas Eve with one side and Boxing Day with the other.

Lots of variations of the same thing, just pick what works for you.

must of missed it