Exasperated with nip screw husband.

Nip screw?

@MyOtherCarIsAPorsche I thought this was going to be some sort of weird fetish thread, I've never heard of nip screw.

Presumably you work and earn an income, so why do you need his permission to buy a necessary household appliance? It's hardly being extravagant is it? I would add that this kind of stinginess gives me the ick, as does cooking using ALL the pots and pans, it's so pointless.

Get a new one delivered, fitted and the old one taken away. Just make sure you get a decent one, because if it doesn't wash properly or there are any problems, he'll never let you hear the end of it will he?

This. I'd be telling him that I absolutely will fucking dare and he can fuck off if he doesn't like it. Tough shit mate, your repair didn't work so I'm getting a new one, don't need your permission

All those years, and the odd glimpses of the past, very sad.
so hard to know whether to stick, twist or poison. I'd definitely order the dishwasher because he's already repaired once and you are thinking of him with all the other stuff I'm sure he has on his list to be getting on with.

As for the boat, idiot. Everyone knows if it flys, floats or fucks, hire it.

Is this a real post?
Very similar to a recent post where the husband bought a 15k guitar but the wife had very little financial freedom & had to ask permission for purchases.

I just think the line ‘should I LTB’ is very odd.

Oh for God’s sake, how on earth is this comment helpful to OP? DFOD.

why did you force your daughter to spend her 14th birthday looking at KITCHENS? weirdy cruel

Trying to fix things is a good idea if it’s a relatively new appliance but if it’s ancient and had its time, replacing makes most sense. Nip screw is a weird term.

Buy the dishwasher- there are full sized ones from £197 at argos!
Have it delivered when he is out so he cannot refuse it and it will cost you to return
Take it out of his beer money

He bought a boat?! Fuck him, if he's prepared to throw money away like that he can get you a new dishwasher.

You deserve so much better than this OP.

Can you get him onto finding a bargain replacement one- a decent Bosch or something? I've bought a lot of appliances "graded" i.e. shop returns, minor cosmetic faults etc, you can usually get a good third off the shop price.

OTOH, as usual it's not really about a dishwasher is it? It's about your partnership, your respect for each other and trust between you in how you spend your SHARED money. He needs a talking to and maybe an ultimatum.

I'd have ordered it by now. If he can afford to be the generous father he can be a reasonable husband.
I can't imagine living with this level of meanness. Fair play to him if he can actually fix it but a short-term fix which fails isn't a fix, it's just a bodge job.
But much more worrying is the abuse. He treats you like shit. Put a stop to that now.

he sounds abusive spending money on himself and others but not on you

im sorry he was ill but it doesnt excuse what hes doing

Our circuit board went bad on our dishwasher. We were told the cost of a new board was almost the same as a new dishwasher so we just got a new dishwasher. Sometimes you just have to buy new stuff. That's how life goes.

Every update is more horrendous. He makes you return things you order without his consent? You are in an abusive relationship.

It is well known fact that men whose wives are seriously ill tend to opt out of the marriage, whereas women whose husbands are seriously ill will stay the course. He is ill, if this behaviour is the result of his life-saving surgery.
If you were behaving like this as the result of life-saving surgery would he stay with you? Or would he opt out for a comfortable life?Think about it.

OP, he is seriously abusive. He reminds me of my nasty dad, who resented my mum coming to visit my children - yes, he was jealous of his own grandchildren. I know you said he had some kind of operation which apparently has altered his personality, but that doesn't mean that you have to stay with him.

You could start making to plans to leave, today. Firstly, get an appointment with a solicitor. You could also contact women's aid because at some level I don't think you realise that you're being abused. it is never too late to be free and live a happy life. He has infantilised and disempowered you.

15 years, fair enough. It’s done its bit. I’m in team buy new dishwasher now.

Order the dishwasher , spare money on things he likes , favourite food ? Sorry to expensive , drinks ? Sorry to expensive . He is taking the oiss and disrespecting you imo

Oh dear. So does this mean most of the money is in accounts in his name?

It's a bit sad he's the one who encouraged you to leave work to look after the grandkids and now he hates that you babysit the grandkids.

😂😂😂👏

Just order a new one to be delivered & installed. And pay the extra for the old one to be taken away.
If he moans it's too expensive/can't afford it say it's ok, you'll put his boat up for sale to cover it.

You’re extravagant for replacing a 15 year old dishwasher but he can buy a secret boat?? Divorce him.