Am I a complete weirdo for contemplating moving to America?

There’s no nice way of saying this but honestly if the money trumps the feeling of home thing there’s your answer.

I wouldn’t go if I had children, or if I might possibly need any kind of reproductive care.

From bleak to bleak, makes no sense.

Why not trade up.

Yabu to go with children.
Have you factored in all the costs? Specifically health insurance?

And unless there is a giant shift this is unlikely to ever change

Dear OP - politics and all that other stuff will always be there. Fundamentally, you do what makes you and your family happy. The house is gorgeous and if I was in your situation I’d already be packing my bags 😁

I can see the temptation, but with children I wouldn’t. Or maybe just do it and rent for a couple of years then move back for secondary school. I wouldn’t want to have a teenager of either sex live in a country where abortion is becoming less and less available, it could be life changing, and for a girl it could be life threatening.

Yes.

In a similar position @Frinkleg . Partner been offered promotion in NY. but we've negotiated a Secondment. Absolutely will take it. It's our last chance for a big adventure.

I’d rather have a leader that had the country’s best interests at heart to be honest. It doesn’t feel like we have that in the Uk at the moment. Whereas Trump is very pro-America

Brit here, having lived here 30 years and just acquired citizenship, so now finally committed to the place. CT, if you can afford it, could be lovely and if you can find something fulfilling to do with your time. And if the visa situation is OK - it is definitely getting harder to settle here as a foreigner which is a big part of why I decided to become a full citizen. Yes, things are dire on the national level, but I am optimistic that this won't be true forever, and on a day to day level, if you have enough money, life is still good here. The huge caveat I would add, though, is if you have parents/other family who one day might need help that is hard to give from thousands of miles away. When I moved, I didn't quite realize what that would be like and it's expensive to go back and forth, though do you get free flights because of your husband's profession?

Would you personally have financial independence? If so, I would.

I would go if I didn’t have kids. No question. With kids, I wouldn’t.

I lived in the US during the last Trump administration in a blue state and it felt a long way from Washington and I can’t say I was really impacted by any of his politics. We stayed 3 years, really enjoyed it but it wasn’t home and we moved back for DD to start school in the UK. I think it would definitely be an adventure for a few years! Nothing would convince me to live in a bleugh mcmansion in a suburban gated community though. And IDK where that house is but the only part of CT I know is Greenwich which is absolutely lovely but a house like that would be multiple millions there so do your research and don’t forget to budget for all the extras like property taxes, HOA fees and health insurance.

I’ve lived there twice. As a child on the east coast in a suburb city and then as an adult in New York. It’s a strange mix of things America- living there it quite different to visiting. Don’t under estimate the cost of living. Food is expensive, healthcare is expensive ( even with insurance , the deductibles and extras are ridiculous and it’s so complicated) schools are a mixed bag. And the things you are responsible for as a citizen- clearing sidewalks of snow and keeping drains clear. Especially if living on an estate.
Tax - federal and state plus any in UK. You are not double taxed but have to employ someone to sort it all out for you.
I made good friends - but they were the ones that travelled to Europe and were more left leaning. It’s a vast place so I guess it’s unfair to lump everyone together. Each state is so different.
I left a couple years ago. I was so pleased to get back to England. Overall I feel it’s not a very civilised or developed place.

Go for it!

I didn’t mention guns at all, and wouldn’t base a decision on that. Poland and Sweden are sovereign states; the US is a country even if the government is federal.
I don’t think it would be great to live in an authoritarian state even if you weren’t personally going to be first against the wall but people who think they wouldn’t mind should crack on.

I’m originally from the Northeast US and I say, if you want to, go for it. You may not always have this opportunity, and if you hate it you can always come back.

The politics, guns, lack of holiday time, healthcare etc all played a part in why I wanted to live elsewhere, but there’s also a bit of grass-is-always-greener.

Connecticut is the wealthiest and best educated state in the US, good quality of life, a beautiful part of the country. You certainly won’t be insulated from the insane politics, but if I had to move back to the US it’s one of the few places I’d consider.

Don’t let a big house cloud your judgment, houses mean nothing it’s their Location Location Location.

You will get a lot of reactions about the politics etc but things are so regional. I live in CA, while what is happening at the national level is discouraging I do feel it less because I live in a state where I don’t fear my rights being taken away and it so a state that cares about its citizens with a social safety net and strong employee protections. My quality of life is far superior to what it would be in the UK in every way. Yes healthcare is expensive but with a good employer plan you would be fine. The facilities at my local school are unbelievable and the range of educational opportunities is excellent as well as the extra curriculars available. I have lived in the U.S. for over 20 years and have yet to see a gun apart from on a police officer. I think CT would be similar in many ways, good schools, safe, likeminded people. Mumsnet is probably not the place to ask and people get on their moral high horse about how terrible the U.S. is and they could never live here.

I think it would be a fun adventure… I assume a pilot is always going to be employable so you could always return home.

US horrified me right now. I would hate to live there.
Having said that, I can see why the money, house and pool are making you consider it!