Am I a complete weirdo for contemplating moving to America?

Yes. Surely there are lots of places in the world where you would have more money?

She did say she is already a sahm

Agree in house quality. There is definitely a mix. But CT doesn’t have as crazy a weather and most houses are well insulated to stand the cold winters so are pretty good quality. You will even find some ‘old’ colonial stock - although would recommend that - the colonials didn’t go in for big rooms 😂

honestly, I wouldn’t bother with a pool in CT. Huge cost and although the summers are hot - they aren’t that long. Everything will freeze in the winter. Join a country club instead.

I wouldn’t myself and have lived in many countries around the world. Are there not opportunities to fly elsewhere?

yabu, but mainly for living in the Home Alone house.

OP, don't be fooled by the house. My friend was an estate agent there and said most newer houses were of poor quality and built for show. She chose an older "Georgian" property for herself.

We almost moved to Texas about fifteen years ago and even then, you had to consider neighbourhoods carefully. A house similar to to mine in the UK was $700k then. And as pp said,health ins, taxes, HOA shite etc. In the end we didn't, even though DH's employer covered rent and health ins. because I wouldn't be allowed to work over there. However, this could be your chance to be a sahm, if that appeals.

Being British is a huge advantage in the US so I would say go for it, but have a plan in place for if DH loses his job/you have to return to the UK etc.

This is a massive stretch! oPs husband is a pilot so entering through airports he would be beyond fine - I’m sure tsa would treat him like a prince! Working for an airline he would have an iron clad visa, healthcare would be first rate. Quality of life for high earners in America compared to UK is considerably higher. You would have a wonderful time. Honestly politics everywhere is a mess. The Labour government have been appalling. Never known anything like - waking up each morning to ‘what now?’

Well fascists tend not to come for the rich in favoured industries until close to the end, so there's that.

More immediately, Brits overlook that American is a federal system, and the individual State has a lot of power. Many are protecting their citizens from the worst excesses of that vile creature, especially the democratic voting ones. Connecticut is progressive in US terms.

I have two American DIL's and my BIL is a now a US citizen. Whilst the DIL's miss "home" they would never move back and are reasonably content in the UK, and the way of life. Conversely BIL could never contemplate moving back as his standard of living is far beyond what he had here ( Think luxury houses, boats etc)
The only thing that concerns BIL is healthcare as he ages.
I don't think you are mad OP to consider it, but it is really a big "consider" and only you can assess how your family can or will adapt.

CT is lovely. However make sure you factor in property tax into your calculations. There is a reason those massive houses are cheaper

Sounds like a great opportunity. I have a friend who did similar. Lives in a mansion in the states but is so isolated out there as all friends are in the UK. I don’t know if I could do it though.

besides, the US is not cheap anymore. The politics is unattractive too.

Knowing a few people who have let salaries and tax exemptions decide where they live in the world, the additional cash and lifestyle does not seem to make them happier or happy in some
cases. I would think very clearly about your reasons for going and know go if there are positives aside from having a bigger house…

I'm sure if you are middle class, white, christian and can turn a blind eye to a lot of things it is fine. Many people just live their lives there and never see gun crime or the worst of the US first hand, living in the right place and having plenty of money are the most important things, paying for health care in particular. Would you ever be able to become citizens? You can always come back if it doesn't work out.

Moving countries (I've done it twice, once to Middle East and then to Antipodes) is extremely stressful and can test the strongest marriage.
Bear in mind that if you split up, you won't be able to move the kids back to UK unless he agrees.

The fact you even have to say that is pretty bad, like pale skinned black people 'passing' for white many years ago to avoid discrimination.

It sounds like you're pretty convinced to go so not sure what anyone says here would make a difference anyway (and nor should it obviously!)

But for me, 300 odd school shootings this year, t
being stuck with no financial independence and no option to leave (if you split DH can keep kids there), and the uncertainty of what the next 3yrs brings with the mad king in charge would mean its a NO for now.

Also how healthy is the housing market? Like how quick would a big house like that sell if you needed or wanted to come back?

As someone who has been back n forth for years and is FINALLY getting toward the end of the greencard process, I would say it's not all bad but living there and holidaying there are really quite different. The cost of living there is very different too, property taxes are silly high in some states (no idea about Conneticut sorry). But if you do move there are lots of fb groups that can help with things and I know my local brit community there have regular meet ups n stuff, just all people who's only connection is our nationality. Do also be aware that when you live in a non touristy area that not everyone is receptive to a 'foreigner' in their community. I've had people comment on us taking their jobs n homes but will add a majority are lovely and just find me a novelty in my community.

Like the US then, and they don't hide it!

If you don’t have kids then I’d definitely go. Connecticut is beautiful - it will be great to experience a different way of life.
My biggest regret is not working abroad when I had the chance. There’s a lot wrong with most countries but I love the diversity of the US landscape and would love to have lived there for a few years.

We have family and friends in the US.
My cousin and his wife, born in the US, are in the process of emigrating.
My other cousin and her family are living there because the kids are in education but they're not happy.
My sister in law with US citizenship and her family are impacted by the shutdowns.
My other sister in law and her family are on green cards and have just relocated (job security is to frighteningly poor) but can't buy because their previously secure immigration status no longer stands.
Family friends are deeply unhappy.
I wouldn't visit let alone live there at the moment.
Employment and health rights are terrifying let alone school standards and safety.

Nope wouldn't take my kids over there at all and regardless of anything else being better my kids safety comes first and yes something could happen in UK but the fact guns are so available over there is a no from me

BTW - that house is gorgeous - parts of the US sure do build beautiful big houses well. It looks like the one from "Father of the Bride". I'd go for it OP. If you hate it you can always go home.

Can we just stop with this garbage? Australia - most multicultural country in the world.Over a quarter of people born overseas, over half having at least one parent from overseas. Gosh its so annoying living in one of the most mixed race, hugely peaceful countries.( sarcasm) Please do stay away with your racism towards us all.

Your DH's new salary may well be 3x his current salary on paper but once you start to deduct things like tax, health insurance/costs, travel/commute, groceries, etc. it probably won't be quite as much more than you think. That's not to say you won't still be better off in the US financially.

Also check out things like your husband's "home base" etc., it could be that he would be expected to operate out of an airport several hours away from where you plan to live. If so, the travel time and costs to get to his operating base from his home would usually be expected to be on his own time and at his own costs. The pay structure with a lot of American airlines is vastly different to UK airlines so another thing to check out.

If you enjoy America and do your due diligence then why not give it a go. As a pilot he'll almost always be employable somewhere in the world. Maybe this could be the start of many years living overseas moving from country to country experiencing the world!!

I work in IT, got a job with an H1B visa, the company interviewed in London looking for programmers who use the language I know.

I initially lived in an apartment, then bought a small house and got my green card after a 4 year application. Met my husband at work, he has a similar experience in coming to America, but not from the UK, and between us we built a life and family together.

No amount of money would tempt me to send my kids off every day to an American school.