Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Ex won't remove his belongings

87 replies

igotyoubabex · 12/11/2025 17:36

I have made several attempts to contact my ex partner to arrange collection for their belongings in my property. Some of these items include clothing, TVs and electrical equipment. He has blocked me and also my friend who contacted him, trying to prompt collection. This is just a way of controlling me and I'd really just like to get the stuff out of my home and move on. Where would I stand on taking the stuff to the skip and just getting rid of it all? I've tried to contact him multiple times but am still blocked.

OP posts:
Fiftyandme · 12/11/2025 18:57

Bag it up. Put it outside. Message him.

Original poster
igotyoubabex · 12/11/2025 18:56

Thank you everyone. Really appreciate your time and comments. X

OP posts:
ForLoveNotMoney · 12/11/2025 18:55

OP I think you have done all you can. I would just get rid of it all. He has no come back on you if you have screenshots of all the attempts to tell him you are getting rid of he doesn’t collect.

Enjoy disposing of it all!

EmeraldPebble · 12/11/2025 18:52

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Honestly, seek help. You clearly have a sad life if you’re spending your time commenting such rubbish. Reported to HQ - OP, ignore these idiotic replies!

Original poster
igotyoubabex · 12/11/2025 18:51

@TeaBiscuitsNaptime honestly I love your kindness however, this won't be the case. It is a control tactic to have over me, as a way of causing what he will deem as conflict in my life. He will be thoroughly enjoying people trying to contact him on my behalf. He will lap up the attention. Unfortunately not all people have a good heart like yourself

OP posts:
Unreserved · 12/11/2025 18:50

igotyoubabex · 12/11/2025 18:49

@Unreserved Hi, no he's self employed so doesn't have a base unfortunately.

Yes, I realised and edited my post, must have crossed with yours. Other suggestions included.

GuiltMarbleHeron · 12/11/2025 18:50

Just bin it

Original poster
igotyoubabex · 12/11/2025 18:49

@Unreserved Hi, no he's self employed so doesn't have a base unfortunately.

OP posts:
TeaBiscuitsNaptime · 12/11/2025 18:48

It sounds like he doesn't want to accept the break up. He could be upset too and could need more time. People are human too. He could be trying to get his head around it and is distressed at the thought of picking it up. If you can and if there is a lot of stuff. I'd have it left at his friends or relatives house. Someone you can get in contact with who's nearby. Then send him a message and tell him where it is, just one text. You don't want to bombard him either if he's not answering. It'll just cause more problems. He has your number if he wants to reply. Good luck!

CharlieEffie · 12/11/2025 18:46

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Why is it any concern of yours whether how long they were together/if they moved in too fast???

Its not relevant to what the OP was asking.

Odd behaviour on your part

Toooldtopretend · 12/11/2025 18:46

igotyoubabex · 12/11/2025 18:42

@Berthatydfil that is really helpful, thank you so much. I shall take a look at that.

@Toooldtopretend wow how absolutely vile! Apple doesn't fall far from the tree obviously.

His parents passed away and his sister is great favour of his ex, so there's not many of his family to involve, luckily I suppose from your experience. I'm sorry you went through that but I'm more than sure you've made up for it in life and are now way happier.

@Ilovemychocolate feeling so much better after the advice on this post, thank you. Always expect a couple of odd balls on here so no worries by me. Thank you.

Trust me, I 100% got the last laugh and ended up all the better- and you will too.

Get rid of that old rubbish, onwards and upwards! X

Original poster
igotyoubabex · 12/11/2025 18:45

He's blocked my other friend also. It will all be removed next Friday. Shame bonfire night has been already.

OP posts:
Ilovemychocolate · 12/11/2025 18:45

igotyoubabex · 12/11/2025 18:42

@Berthatydfil that is really helpful, thank you so much. I shall take a look at that.

@Toooldtopretend wow how absolutely vile! Apple doesn't fall far from the tree obviously.

His parents passed away and his sister is great favour of his ex, so there's not many of his family to involve, luckily I suppose from your experience. I'm sorry you went through that but I'm more than sure you've made up for it in life and are now way happier.

@Ilovemychocolate feeling so much better after the advice on this post, thank you. Always expect a couple of odd balls on here so no worries by me. Thank you.

Take care lovely x

Unreserved · 12/11/2025 18:44

Can you send him the ‘bin day’ plans, by recorded delivery, to his work?

ETA just re-read, you said he is self employed. Any regular customers where you could leave and photograph a note on his vehicle.

Original poster
igotyoubabex · 12/11/2025 18:43

@Vaxtable he's self employed unfortunately! Literally the only thing he took was his tools and some underwear.

OP posts:
Unreserved · 12/11/2025 18:43

My ExDH refused to collect his stuff.

I reminded him of bin day, (three days ahead), told him his stuff would be beside the bins and if he wanted any of it he would need to collect before the bin men!

He did!

You need to work out how to let him know your plans.

Original poster
igotyoubabex · 12/11/2025 18:42

@Berthatydfil that is really helpful, thank you so much. I shall take a look at that.

@Toooldtopretend wow how absolutely vile! Apple doesn't fall far from the tree obviously.

His parents passed away and his sister is great favour of his ex, so there's not many of his family to involve, luckily I suppose from your experience. I'm sorry you went through that but I'm more than sure you've made up for it in life and are now way happier.

@Ilovemychocolate feeling so much better after the advice on this post, thank you. Always expect a couple of odd balls on here so no worries by me. Thank you.

OP posts:
Dollymylove · 12/11/2025 18:42

Vaxtable · 12/11/2025 18:40

Do you know where he works! I would be tempted to take it there and leave it

Now that's a good idea 😆

Vaxtable · 12/11/2025 18:40

Do you know where he works! I would be tempted to take it there and leave it

Ilovemychocolate · 12/11/2025 18:38

igotyoubabex · 12/11/2025 18:37

@Goodnightreps poor, poor me hey. I've just put some violins on now for extra sympathy. I hope you have found the validation you were seeking here and I hope you feel so much better.

Just ignore her, vile person.
OP I hope you get it sorted, and that you are feeling better now he’s (nearly) out your life for good.

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 12/11/2025 18:38

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Goodness how did you extrapolate all of that from the OP's posts?
Hmm you're just making things up.

isthesolution · 12/11/2025 18:38

You are going to way too much effort. Bag it up and take it to the charity shop. You’ve attempted and failed to make contact.

Toooldtopretend · 12/11/2025 18:37

I had an ex like this years ago, he actually threatened me with legal action when I said I was going to get them delivered back to him (and claimed he was at a funeral that day - he 100% wasn’t). I did message about his legal action basis “my ex is trying to give my things back to me”.

in the end I put them in a storage unit and said I’d pay for a week in which he either collected them, arranged to pay for them or they could do what they wanted.

incidentally this was also an ex (who left for another woman) who post break up said his dad would come round and knee cap me 🙄 - what a gent!

Original poster
igotyoubabex · 12/11/2025 18:37

@Goodnightreps poor, poor me hey. I've just put some violins on now for extra sympathy. I hope you have found the validation you were seeking here and I hope you feel so much better.

OP posts:
Ilovemychocolate · 12/11/2025 18:36

Goodnightreps · 12/11/2025 18:35

Will do

Pluribus calling me!

Show quote history

Well thank fuck for that.
And thank you for your sisterhood…not!

Swipe left for the next trending thread