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Original poster

Would you class this as flirting? DH with shop assistant

385 replies

Bex39 · 12/11/2025 17:07

DH is adamant I am being OTT and he was just being polite but I disagree. Please help settle this for me.

We were in a shop which sells chocolate and he was at the till with me next to him.

Shop assistant - those (the chocolates DH was buying) are my favourites

DH - I would eat so much chocolate if I worked here

SA - tell me about it, I can’t help myself with the samples

DH - you couldn’t tell by your figure

SA - you are being too kind

DH - seriously, you are in great ‘nick’

SA - laughs

OP posts:
fishfingerbutty · 12/11/2025 19:45

He seems to think a lot of himself.

MyTrivia · 12/11/2025 19:42

He’s very creepy. Imagine what he might say when you’re not there?? He sounds like one of those misogynistic men who thinks women can’t wait to hear what he thinks about them.

It’s so inappropriate to comment on
a person’s looks, anyway, whatever the situation.

whistlesandbells · 12/11/2025 19:41

Non thinking sleaziness. Likely the intention to flirt was absent. The kind of interaction from another age - you simply cannot say such unguarded things any longer.

The only response to this is “eew, how creepy and clueless” then show pity.

ClaredeBear · 12/11/2025 19:41

It flirting but very in appropriate. I would not be amused if I was on the receiving end of that.

Blodyneighbour · 12/11/2025 19:40

Is this even real? I would just embarrass him and tell him to put his tongue back in his head.

Dweetfidilove · 12/11/2025 19:38

Sherzingaaaaa · 12/11/2025 19:31

Some people like people pissing on them - doesn’t mean we should all go around doing it because we ‘don’t know who is who’

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You're not wrong.

ThatChristmasMug · 12/11/2025 19:37

BauhausOfEliott · 12/11/2025 19:33

The same poster was on another thread recently claiming that anyone who uses a vibrator is a pervert, so my conclusion is that they’re either a troll or insane.

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or a saddo who has been missing out on amazing sex all their life, and has grown bitter and twisted instead

Sherzingaaaaa · 12/11/2025 19:37

BauhausOfEliott · 12/11/2025 19:33

The same poster was on another thread recently claiming that anyone who uses a vibrator is a pervert, so my conclusion is that they’re either a troll or insane.

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Yes I just had a look - apparently males and females being friends - EVER - is inappropriate. With the caveat of if one is gay. Obvs

Any woman using a sex toy is a pervert, as you referenced

Women should always appreciate men’s comments, full stop.

agree with your diagnosis!

diamondsandrose · 12/11/2025 19:36

Asunciondeflata · 12/11/2025 17:12

Did he tell her that they put it smell in gas?

What does this mean ? Put it smell in gas ?

ThatChristmasMug · 12/11/2025 19:36

Hons123 · 12/11/2025 19:12

It was not a bizarre response, it was a simple question.
What is the value of your female friendship to your male friends? Very simple question. To put it simply, what are they getting from you as a friend that they would not be able to get from their mates?

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huh?

What is the value of a male friendship? What is the value of any friendship?

What a most bizarre question?

what are they getting from you as a friend that they would not be able to get from their mates? I don't know about you, but I am brilliant, so any of my male and female friends are lucky to have me 😂

BauhausOfEliott · 12/11/2025 19:33

Sherzingaaaaa · 12/11/2025 19:30

There is no way this thread hasn’t been flagged on some kind of incel chatroom with these latest responses

what would a man get from a friendship with a female that he wouldn’t get from his male friends? Just a totally warped view of the world. And I’d bet my hat it’s not a female view.

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The same poster was on another thread recently claiming that anyone who uses a vibrator is a pervert, so my conclusion is that they’re either a troll or insane.

drinkwaterx · 12/11/2025 19:32

BauhausOfEliott · 12/11/2025 19:31

So then the poor woman behind the till has to deal with two creeps pestering her instead of one. Jeez.

Just let people do their jobs in peace ffs.

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🙄

megacat · 12/11/2025 19:32

Completely inappropriate and sleazy to comment on a woman’s body. Never mind if he was flirting in front of you or not, the shop assistant must have been very uncomfortable with his comments.

Being from a ‘different era’ doesn’t excuse a thing. He needs to learn to keep his mouth shut and stop making women squirm.

BauhausOfEliott · 12/11/2025 19:31

drinkwaterx · 12/11/2025 19:18

Id probably keep him talking to get closer to his wife if shes my type lol.
Im woman that like women.

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So then the poor woman behind the till has to deal with two creeps pestering her instead of one. Jeez.

Just let people do their jobs in peace ffs.

Sherzingaaaaa · 12/11/2025 19:31

Dweetfidilove · 12/11/2025 19:10

Some women like when men 'appreciate ' their great figure, some find it repulsive; so who knows how she took it 🤷🏾‍♀️.

There's no flirting though. Overstepping, perhaps. Flirting, no.

Some people like people pissing on them - doesn’t mean we should all go around doing it because we ‘don’t know who is who’

SqB · 12/11/2025 19:31

Flirting doesn’t make you want to slap someone. If he’d commented on my body like that he might have got a slap 😆

Sherzingaaaaa · 12/11/2025 19:30

Hons123 · 12/11/2025 19:12

It was not a bizarre response, it was a simple question.
What is the value of your female friendship to your male friends? Very simple question. To put it simply, what are they getting from you as a friend that they would not be able to get from their mates?

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There is no way this thread hasn’t been flagged on some kind of incel chatroom with these latest responses

what would a man get from a friendship with a female that he wouldn’t get from his male friends? Just a totally warped view of the world. And I’d bet my hat it’s not a female view.

LilyGeorge · 12/11/2025 19:29

ThatChristmasMug · 12/11/2025 18:42

Funny how my teenage SON has a lot worst to say about WOMEN when he's bartending, but it's always men isn't it? I am guessing because my son (and all the others) are male, it doesn't count?

The double standards are hilarious.

I don’t see any double standards on this thread.

And I would be equally appalled at women behaving inappropriately to a young man such as your DS.

No women I know would be have that way and I would challenge them if they did.

BauhausOfEliott · 12/11/2025 19:29

Hons123 · 12/11/2025 18:49

Love advice on MN! Married man and woman being 'friends' and hanging out with members of the opposite sex together - no problem, absolutely the norm, everybody should do that, those who disagree are dinosaurs! Also MN - married man makes polite convo with a shop assistant in front of his wife - sleaze-ball, gross, inappropriate, wrong!

He wasn’t making polite conversation. He was commenting on a (much younger) woman’s figure - a woman he doesn’t know and who has no way of walking away from him if she doesn’t like it and isn’t allowed to tell him to piss off because she’s at work and he’s a customer - and he was doing it in front of his wife. Making two women feel uncomfortable by making comments about one of their bodies isn’t ’polite conversation’.

LilyGeorge · 12/11/2025 19:26

ThatChristmasMug · 12/11/2025 18:35

MN Bingo, all the haters coming in force to scream yuk, sleezy, revolting, disgusting. You cannot make that up 😂

Yes, I am female, before someone get all miffed and accuse me to have a penis or something😂

Well if you like strange men coming into your work place and commenting on your body, that’s fine. But as you can see by this thread lots of women (most?) dont like it so he should do it.

There’s a power imbalance at play, the shop assistant isn’t able to tell him to “fuck off” as she she would be free to in a social setting.

Kelly1969 · 12/11/2025 19:24

It’s cringy at any age, but more embarrassing at 54!

BauhausOfEliott · 12/11/2025 19:23

Crudd99 · 12/11/2025 19:06

See how he likes it. Next time you're in a shop that sells mens clothes start complementing the nearest male assistant on the shape of their figure and how they look like they work out etc.

Don’t use some poor young shop assistant, who has done nothing wrong, as a prop to score points off your husband. That’s hideous behaviour. Other people aren’t there to get involved in this creepy shit.

drinkwaterx · 12/11/2025 19:18

Booklook · 12/11/2025 19:15

There's a world of difference between someone you know telling you you look nice and a stranger doing it while you are working and in front of his wife

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Id probably keep him talking to get closer to his wife if shes my type lol.
Im woman that like women.

Bikergran · 12/11/2025 19:17

One comment, fine. The second one, "you're in great nick"? Totally inappropriate 🤮

Booklook · 12/11/2025 19:15

drinkwaterx · 12/11/2025 19:10

Would i like it if some man said i had nice tits that fill out my jumper YES without a doubt yes.
And i laugh about it.
Because i dont find offence in everything.
If anyone wants to tell me i look good even though i look rough im gonna take it because life is shit with everyone taking offence.

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There's a world of difference between someone you know telling you you look nice and a stranger doing it while you are working and in front of his wife

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