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AIBU?

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Would you class this as flirting? DH with shop assistant

385 replies

Bex39 · 12/11/2025 17:07

DH is adamant I am being OTT and he was just being polite but I disagree. Please help settle this for me.

We were in a shop which sells chocolate and he was at the till with me next to him.

Shop assistant - those (the chocolates DH was buying) are my favourites

DH - I would eat so much chocolate if I worked here

SA - tell me about it, I can’t help myself with the samples

DH - you couldn’t tell by your figure

SA - you are being too kind

DH - seriously, you are in great ‘nick’

SA - laughs

OP posts:
restingbitchface30 · 13/11/2025 21:15

If my partner said that he would be sleeping on the couch indefinitely

momtoboys · 13/11/2025 21:11

IwishIcouldconfess · 12/11/2025 17:13

Another non event that I couldn't get worked up about if I tried

😂😂😂

Spookyspaghetti · 13/11/2025 21:11

Simbaonedaythiswillallbeyours · 12/11/2025 17:13

I bet she thought he was a right creep.

Yeah, I’d be super embarrassed if someone said that to me in front of their partner.

PithyTaupeWriter · 13/11/2025 20:49

Ugh gross, it is horrible to have to deal with comments from men about one's figure. He was definitely flirting and/or being creepy. I bet he wouldn't say it to a male shop assistant.

TheCryingTheBitchAndTheFloordrobe · 13/11/2025 20:48

Grim.

How big is his ego that he thought saying something so sleazy to a stranger would 'make their day'?

Working in retail is so fucking tedious.

Kittyloulou · 13/11/2025 20:47

gross! Your husband is a creep

Glitchymn1 · 13/11/2025 20:46

“In great nick”🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I’d think- thanks a bunch cheeky lol she can’t say much back as it’s her job.
I don’t think it’s flirting, just something an older person would say.

Dinosaurhearmeroar · 13/11/2025 20:37

Sleazy. Don’t need some random man telling me I’m in great nick. Fuck. Off. 😂

Theworstgamerever · 13/11/2025 20:32

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

grrrlatrix · 13/11/2025 20:31

🤮
Just so rotten.

fatphalange · 13/11/2025 20:24

JudgeJ · 13/11/2025 19:46

Then they should not make remarks about the purchase, she made a comment and he responded, it may have been perceived as 'pervy' by the perpetually offended, others would just accept it for what it was.

We do all accept it for what it was: a pervy, leery couple of comments. You’re very much in the minority here. There’s a reason for that. Because you’re wrong.

Sunshineandgrapefruit · 13/11/2025 20:17

He sounds like a catch.

OutwiththeOutCrowd · 13/11/2025 20:15

JudgeJ · 13/11/2025 19:46

Then they should not make remarks about the purchase, she made a comment and he responded, it may have been perceived as 'pervy' by the perpetually offended, others would just accept it for what it was.

I must be a pearl clutcher because to go from -

shop assistant: those (the chocolates) are my favourites to ...
DH: seriously, you are in great ‘nick’

does not seem like an inevitable conversational development to me and cannot be pinned on the shop assistant for being friendly.

However, as it happens, I think quite a lot of men do have thoughts along similar lines ... but they know to apply a filter to the murky rumblings of the subconscious.

staceyflack · 13/11/2025 20:11

Yuck. Poor you to be saddled with him. Can you rethink your plans? Best of luck x

Bigears6789 · 13/11/2025 20:09

Creepy and gross. This must have given you the ick

Holluschickie · 13/11/2025 20:08

So many blokes on this thread.

CypressGrove · 13/11/2025 20:07

JudgeJ · 13/11/2025 19:46

Then they should not make remarks about the purchase, she made a comment and he responded, it may have been perceived as 'pervy' by the perpetually offended, others would just accept it for what it was.

What? It's part of her job to make friendly chit chat with customers. Saying they were her favourite chocolates is not an invite for creepy sexist men to comment on her body.

Mangetoutmangetouti · 13/11/2025 20:03

Bex39 · 12/11/2025 18:04

He’s from a different era, stuck in his ways sadly no matter how hard I try to educate him.

He really is NOT from a different era. He came of age late 80s / early 90s 🙄

weusedtobeapropercountry · 13/11/2025 20:01

CactusSammy · 13/11/2025 19:48

And this is the problem with men. They just dont get how their unsolicited comments about women's appearance makes us feel.

I think it goes beyond that, tbh. Our feelings are our own to deal with. It's the culture/society that it creates: one in which we are products on display at all times. Where our worth is judged by how doable we are. Where men can openly sit in judgement on our figure, and we are supposed to be thrilled when the judgement is a positive one. There are people who think this is all about "offence", who fail to see that that society is one where women are second class citizens. Most normal people recognise that sort of culture is toxic and doesn't lend itself to equality or respect between men and women 😬

CypressGrove · 13/11/2025 20:01

Bex39 · 12/11/2025 18:04

He’s from a different era, stuck in his ways sadly no matter how hard I try to educate him.

Absolute rubbish. That might fly if he was 74, but at 54 he's just a creep.

TheEveningSun · 13/11/2025 19:56

Bex39 · 12/11/2025 18:04

He’s from a different era, stuck in his ways sadly no matter how hard I try to educate him.

What different era? My DP is 51 and he’d never talk to a random woman like that. He does compliment female friends sometimes but not in a sleazy way

OnlyHasEyesForLoki · 13/11/2025 19:55

Bex39 · 12/11/2025 20:11

I’ve offered to show DH the replies on here, but apparently we’re all a bunch of miserable middle aged women and he couldn’t care less!

Ah “middle class women of a certain age” eh? How do you put up with him?

weusedtobeapropercountry · 13/11/2025 19:52

JudgeJ · 13/11/2025 19:46

Then they should not make remarks about the purchase, she made a comment and he responded, it may have been perceived as 'pervy' by the perpetually offended, others would just accept it for what it was.

What kind of "she was asking for it" twattery is that? 😂

No, of I make polite conversation with a stranger/customer, I am not inviting them to judge and make remarks about my body. Get a bloody grip 😂

CactusSammy · 13/11/2025 19:48

And this is the problem with men. They just dont get how their unsolicited comments about women's appearance makes us feel.

JudgeJ · 13/11/2025 19:46

fatphalange · 12/11/2025 17:13

I really feel for shop workers being a captive audience for pervy, leery men.

Then they should not make remarks about the purchase, she made a comment and he responded, it may have been perceived as 'pervy' by the perpetually offended, others would just accept it for what it was.