Should he have asked my permission to post photo of me?

She was basically naked and in a photo from behind, I’m guessing he’s only posted it to flaunt her ass

I’m 36 and wouldn’t like this.
But mainly because of the bikini element. If we were at a farm and my boyfriend took a candid photo of me that I wasn’t aware of, playing with an alpaca, then put it on his story, I probably wouldn’t mind.
But if he videod me from behind, at a spa, wearing a bikini, and posted it… without showing me first or mentioning it at all then yes I would find that very weird.
Especially 8 months in, it doesn’t feel quite right.

A picture in of itself wouldn’t, but an objectifying one where my face wasn’t visible would…out of all the pictures he could choose, he chose this one. I think that’s very revealing about the type of man he is. Things like this often say more than words can.

I wouldn’t like it as I look chunky in a bikini. So maybe how you look in a bikini makes a difference to how you feel.
If I looked amazing in a bikini I probably wouldn’t mind.
I think you have told him now, as long as he takes it down and this is the first thing he has done of this nature then I would give him the benefit of the doubt for now.

Love this 😂

I don't think there's anything wrong with two people in a relationship objectifying each other. In fact it can be a lot of fun. It's only a problem if the only means of appreciation is an objectifying one - but the idea that my partner finds me sexually attractive isn't remotely creepy.

As for the photo... most of the time DP or I run past which photos of each other we'll put on socials (not that we use socials a ton these days) but not always. I would OK a flattering bikini picture of me without hesitation and I've definitely posted him in swimming shorts before. I tend to think that if I've posed for the photo and not explicitly said I don't want it on social media, it's consent of sorts - thinking more of photos that friends take of me, including beach ones, where we definitely don't run which specific ones get put on socials past each other.

He’s posted a picture of his half naked girlfriend on social media without her permission, and said he wants to show her off.

I’d let him off this once as you weren’t tagged and face wasn’t in it.
Hopefully he won’t do it again.

It's a hard Monday?

He's not posted photos of his legs on the sun lounger with the pool as the back drop. Or a posh drink on the side table. He's posted a rear view of his girlfriend in a bikini. A hard day is a play on words that he's got a boner from being around her dressed like that. Its meme territory.

How has no-one else clicked this is what he meant?!

It doesn’t sound like there was ill intentions just that he didn’t think about if you’d actually want that photo of yourself online.

People of this generation are so used to posting every aspect of their life online and not actually stopping to think about what they’re posting and sometimes they need it bought to their attention that they should think twice about what and who they post.

It doesn’t really matter what any of us would like or accept- it wasn’t ok with you and that should be enough.

What you need to consider is whether he respects your line, or doubles down.

I wouldn’t like that at all. And I wouldn’t be flattered by it.

It’s taking an intimate moment and turning it into social credit. You’re not a commodity. You’re a person.

Up to you OP to let him know.

I used to have a good figure but that is very much in the past thanks to age and having DC. I wish I could return my body back to my bikini days.

I think this one sums up my thoughts about this. I think it's more flattering than offensive but can see why you might not like it.

As long as he's taken it down when you've asked I think it's probably not worth staying upset over.

Everyone is different but I would definitely not like this. When photos are taken from behind it’s usually staged so when I see a pic like that I would think the person from behind wanted it posted. A bikini shot from behind to me is cringey.
If someone did that to me I would not be happy and like you would ask them to remove it.
Again this is my view only but I would definitely have my guard up now and i would be seeing the bloke in a different light.

I wouldn't care. I post pictures which have me and him in. My husband never posts unless it's food or gym related, so I would be pleased!! Lol. My back i couldn't give two hoots about. If it's only your friends that will recognise you I don't see the problem.
However if you have an agreement he should ask then it is courtesy he asks.

Nice little dig there.

At the end of the day, he’s posted a story about how happy he is because he’s at a spa with his girlfriend. How on earth is that juvenile or pig like?

This is a balanced view.

I think I’d be flattered that he thought I looked great in a bikini, especially if it was a good photo, and that he was having a great Monday with me….but that’s me. What’s important here is how YOU feel about YOUR body being put on social media, and you’re within your rights to ask him to take it down. Hopefully he’ll ask in future before posting you online (or just doesn’t do it).

To you. To me it does. And you’ve just said you’re in your mid-20s, which to me is young (I’m mid 50s). So maybe something that feels juvenile to me isn’t going to to you.

It doesn’t

I think is a generational thing because as a mid 20’s woman I’d never expect to be asked permission for someone to post a story of me!

Are you very young? Because that does sound like a “look at my fit girlfriend” post to his mates, which feels quite a juvenile thing to do.

If it was just a photo I would rather him ask but be ok if he didn't but if someone posted a photo of me in a bikini without asking me I wouldn't be ok with that. Being in swimwear/underwear, a towel is significantly different to being dressed.

Hope there was noone else in shot - I'd be raging if I was at a spa and some dickhead was taking photos all over the place.

😂