To not expect our dc to just buy us a house regardless of our living situation

Just be aware that it is very difficult to get money made on investments particularly in crypto through AML checks. I say this from personal experience - despite having similar amounts acquired through completely legal means within the UK and iwth clear evidence, no mortgage lender would touch us unless as a buy to let. Also he is liable for CGT on that money.

If my DS had 4m I wouldn't have to ask, he'd have offered. I expect people might be a little judgy of him if you've shared both his wealth and your struggles with them. Probably better to have kept both to yourself really because it's the sort of situation people will have an opinion on.

Perhaps you should suggest he speaks to a financial advisor if he’s keeping such a lot in one account. It isn’t sensible.

I don’t see anything too wrong with asking for a loan so you can get yourselves set up in a new place. If you have a good relationship. He might say no. Also fine.

What on earth do you think he's investing in and how much do you think he's investing to make £1.6m in an evening?

I'm sorry OP, your family are challenging him because it's just not true. You have to have put in millions (and risk losing millions) to get results like that.

If he actually made 1.6 in one day, I would seriously be worried he’s involved in rug pulls and similar type schemes.

If he has all that money, is only offering a couple of hundred in rent and no other help, that’s really quite selfish

There’s so much about this thread that really irks me. My Dad was a complete arse to me all my life and when he lost everything, I bailed him out to the tune of £96k! I remortgaged my house, took loans to get him out of a terrible situation. He passed away a few years later and I’ve just about cleared the debt I took on to help him. He didn’t deserve my help but something inside me told me to do it. The fact that your son is £3m liquid, still living in a HA property and not offered to buy you a house outright is disgraceful. It doesn’t haven’t to be an expensive property but something lovely yet modest and safe. I’d be sending him his marching orders if he were mine OP. Where is his moral compass?! Speaking of which, he has the means to free up a HA property to someone else in need when we have a housing crisis.

He hasn’t offered because he DOESNT HAVE IT. It’s patently clear!

You're going to take a loan out anyway and pay the mortgage...why don't you just take a loan out with your DS ... He enjoys staying with you as a family so you can all move out into a better place and in time you can start paying him back. Makes sense ...ask him and see what he says, a couple of hundred thousand from his 4M won't leave him poor and he will still have plenty to see into the future and his investments etc, you will also be paying him back. I don't see the issue and I'm even more surprised he hasn't offered.

To make £1.6m in one day you’d need to have invested over £8m and that would be on an extremely good day with a 20% return. Most days, most investors don’t make anywhere near that.

Ok, how much is the house you are buying to put this into context? Again, he is an adult & you should be able to talk to him about this. It’s not unreasonable for him to contribute in some way if he’s going to live there. Instead of paying a monthly amount since he fends for himself, you could ask for a lump sum?

I live in a council flat with vile neighbours. If my adult son was sitting on £3m he absolutely would not hesitate to buy me a house. Even if it was just a fairly modest one. He'd inherit it anyway. I can't believe your son has watched you struggle to save up for a deposit or that he is completely oblivious to the horrible neighbours and your anxiety. Surely there'd be a "light bulb" moment in his head that he could solve the whole bloody lot by writing a cheque. C'mon OP, surely you can see that this isn't ringing true for a lot of posters on here.

OP, don't engage with thick nit picking posts. Worth a chat as to whether he can support moving the process along at a min.

You 'seen' it in black and white but can't remember the exact amount?

I'd also be ashamed to have that much money and have my parents living like that.

But irrespective of whether he "buys you a house" You need a sit down and a conversation with him about what he is doing with that as it needs diversifying.
He also probably needs a will

So young man who has made £4m by investing is keeping £3m in cash? 🤣

And, in the spirit of trying to be helpful. If your son does in fact have that amount in the bank, the bank might very well be tripping over itself to give him a line of credit as a decent interest rate. Perhaps he could set that up and use it to help you?

As I said before, I don’t think it’s you that is making it up. Your son is

You're having a giraffe!

If this is real, then yes, I would expect your son with £4 million who is choosing still to live with you five years into adulthood to use a small part of his fortune to secure you a permanent home. This doesn’t have to be a home he gifts to you - he could own it and allow you to live there. It reflects extremely poorly on the son you raised that this doesn’t seem to have occurred to him.

Eh?

Of course people are allowed to do well. Many of us do. We wouldn't leave £3m sitting in our current accounts, so it's just quite surprising. To the point it's making us wonder if you have the whole story.

Right!? No one who knew what they were doing with money would leave 3M in a SAVINGS account.

So he has £3M in a current account and is happy to continue living in a house where the neighbours make your lives a misery? 🤔