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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Do you think we should life the two child benefit cap?

758 replies

Marshmallow4545 · 11/11/2025 07:16

I believe that the majority of people think that the cap should remain and child poverty should be tackled in different ways.

Personally I would like to see children on FSMs allowed free access to after school extracurricular clubs and activities. I would also provide more poor families with access to food banks and would look to stock these with a range of healthy and nutritious options either through donation or state funding if required. I would also look to recruit volunteers to offer advice on health and diet in these places. I would provide clothing and school uniform banks with high quality, second hand clothing that kids would actually want to wear. I have some branded 'fashionable' stuff my kids have grown out of that's still in great condition that I would happily donate.

All of the above in my view is preferable to lifting the cap and would be more effective in tackling the impact that child poverty has on the child.

So AIBU that the two child cap should remain and we should look at other more direct ways to tackle child poverty?

OP posts:
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MaturingCheeseball · 12/11/2025 09:27

I am FUMING about the strong rumours today that the cap will be lifted.

Don’t forget that the benefit also applies to children resident abroad, so some people could claim for any number of children, genuine or fictional.

Before someone inevitably says “But we need them to be future taxpayers….” - vast numbers are not working and will never work. The purpose of girls (presumably 50% of any children) is to marry and have many children, just perpetuating the benefit and indeed child poverty problem.

Having four children, reasonable enough. But continuing to produce 10 or 12 is not conducive to lifting your family out of poverty. It’s a way of life financed by schmucks.

HermioneWeasley · 12/11/2025 09:22

SoftBalletShoes · 12/11/2025 01:45

Maybe two kids IS plenty, but what about all the children who are already here and who are suffering from the drop in household income caused by the cap? And what about people whose second child turns out to be twins or even triplets? And accidental pregnancies? People should not be forced into abortions that they do not want. That is cruel.

Edited

The cap was not retrospective so anyone who had more than 2 kids (excluding multiple births) did so in the knowledge it would apply.

people need to start taking responsibility for their decisions. There is free contraception and more or less abortion on demand. There is no reason to have more children than you can afford and I am not more responsible for your kids than you are.

Marshmallow4545 · 12/11/2025 09:19

CloverPyramid · 12/11/2025 08:26

If a woman is living with domestic abuse, the only person to blame is the husband who is beating her. No funding for refuges.

If someone is a victim of theft, the only person to blame is the person who robbed them. No funding for the police.

If someone is left paralysed by a car accident, the only person to blame is the other driver. No funding for their medical care.

Do you think we should refuse to help all vulnerable people whose suffering is the fault of someone else? Or is it just children?

You need to look at the root cause of the suffering though and make sure that the help that you're offering directly benefits the vulnerable person.

Child poverty is measured as a financial measure comparing a household's income to the median. All these charities and reports stating that giving money to the poor households will lift them out of so called poverty are stating the bleeding obvious. The household will of course be richer because you have given them more money. It's not rocket science! Is this really sorting out the underlying issues associated with child poverty? I fundamentally believe it isn't.

Using your examples, who are the perpetrators of child poverty? You have a thief, an abuser and a reckless driver in your examples so who would you blame in regards to people having more children than they can afford and the state will properly provide for? We know that only children born after the cap was introduced are impacted and there is an exemption for multiples. So this means all children impacted have been brought into this situation by their parents. Their parents have knowingly chosen to have more and more children knowing that these children will live in poverty. Sure there are cases of abuse and religion and everything else but ultimately the parents are responsible for these children being created.

We then think the best way to tackle child poverty is to give extra money to the people that brought these children into poverty in the first place? That for whatever reason were unable to take the measures required to ensure their family size was equal to their financial means. These are the people you trust and think are in position to make responsible, sensible decisions with this extra money that will meaningfully mitigate against the impacts of growing up in poverty? I just don't believe it and I think in many cases the children will be the ones that lose out. The money would be much better spent directly on the children in question ensuring that their needs were being met.

OP posts:
TheaBrandt1 · 12/11/2025 09:11

At the moment raising taxes on the working population and ending this cap at the same time will rightly or wrongly cause resentment.

EasternStandard · 12/11/2025 09:08

SoftBalletShoes · 12/11/2025 01:58

Only from the right. Normal people would be delighted to see six hundred thousand helpless children lifted out of poverty.

No it’s not polling well at all.

Marshmallow4545 · 12/11/2025 09:05

SoftBalletShoes · 12/11/2025 01:58

Only from the right. Normal people would be delighted to see six hundred thousand helpless children lifted out of poverty.

Every single poll conducted on this issue proves that the public are overwhelmingly against lifting the cap. This is true amongst Labour voters who would normally be considered more left leaning than other parties.

I'm afraid 'normal' people want the cap to remain. It is only the quite far left that want it lifted. They aren't the majority in this country and we are supposed to be a democracy. Lifting the cap would be highly undemocratic.

OP posts:
Differentforgirls · 12/11/2025 08:50

nearlylovemyusername · 12/11/2025 02:56

Funded by whom exactly?

The Government. People already claim childcare benefits.

Sexentric · 12/11/2025 08:42

CloverPyramid · 12/11/2025 08:26

If a woman is living with domestic abuse, the only person to blame is the husband who is beating her. No funding for refuges.

If someone is a victim of theft, the only person to blame is the person who robbed them. No funding for the police.

If someone is left paralysed by a car accident, the only person to blame is the other driver. No funding for their medical care.

Do you think we should refuse to help all vulnerable people whose suffering is the fault of someone else? Or is it just children?

Exactly this. So many people seem to see children as ''lifestyle choices' of their parents instead of real, actual, vulnerable PEOPLE in their own right. Almost like you'd think of a car or something. Its disgusting.

CloverPyramid · 12/11/2025 08:26

winterbluess · 11/11/2025 07:41

Absolutely not. If children are living in poverty, the only people to blame are the parents that had them knowing they can't afford to look after them!

If a woman is living with domestic abuse, the only person to blame is the husband who is beating her. No funding for refuges.

If someone is a victim of theft, the only person to blame is the person who robbed them. No funding for the police.

If someone is left paralysed by a car accident, the only person to blame is the other driver. No funding for their medical care.

Do you think we should refuse to help all vulnerable people whose suffering is the fault of someone else? Or is it just children?

Andanotherplease · 12/11/2025 08:18

NotEnoughKnittingTime · 12/11/2025 08:12

Wrong poster I think?

Yes sorry it was about the quote saying about MAP

winterbluess · 12/11/2025 08:18

SoftBalletShoes · 12/11/2025 01:45

Maybe two kids IS plenty, but what about all the children who are already here and who are suffering from the drop in household income caused by the cap? And what about people whose second child turns out to be twins or even triplets? And accidental pregnancies? People should not be forced into abortions that they do not want. That is cruel.

Edited

The children that are already here affected by the cap were born knowing they wouldn't be paid for. Parents responsibility! Twins or triplets are exempt from the cap.

Andanotherplease · 12/11/2025 08:17

Grapewrath · 12/11/2025 03:30

They should direct more money at decent school meals and breakfast clubs.
This will not be popular decision

In some cases they aren’t even directing ANY money to schools for the proposed breakfast clubs and expecting schools to staff and fund it. To put more pressure on schools to deliver will dilute the actual education they offer. Support needs to be for these children in poverty at home . As I said before no amount of extra clubs and more hours in school can solve issues like cold damp unhealthy housing that leads to poor sleep and more illness for these children, it doesn’t lift some of the burden off parents working in low paid exhausting jobs who are low and stressed, if you want to improve outcomes home is as important as school. Unless you think children should also just sleep at school too and then you can force their parents to work nights too but that’ll be ok as long as it doesn’t affect you. It’s this undercurrent of ‘yes you deserve help but only the help we think is below us you can’t have anything that we have or aspire to’ it’s like when you see people adding to food bank donation areas - always the very very cheapest as if they think they should do something but not anything to make life too comfortable for the underclass. Yes have your tin of beans but not Heinz have you dented tin of value ones but we can still say we are propping up the feckless of society

NotEnoughKnittingTime · 12/11/2025 08:12

Andanotherplease · 12/11/2025 08:11

MAP doesn’t always work. It prevents ovulation but if that has already occurred it won’t work. It’s not something that’s 100% effective. Accidental pregnancy is always likely. Condoms break, the pill may not be absorbed due to other factors plus there’s also the issue of non consensual sex.

Wrong poster I think?

Andanotherplease · 12/11/2025 08:11

NotEnoughKnittingTime · 12/11/2025 06:37

Only for one of them if you have two children already.

MAP doesn’t always work. It prevents ovulation but if that has already occurred it won’t work. It’s not something that’s 100% effective. Accidental pregnancy is always likely. Condoms break, the pill may not be absorbed due to other factors plus there’s also the issue of non consensual sex.

Pumpkinallspice · 12/11/2025 07:53

And if you got accidentally pregnant for the third time and didn't have much money, and really wanted the baby, how would you like to be effectively coerced into an abortion because of the cap? It would break your heart.

It's the sane decision a self supporting working family would be faced with. We couldn't have another child now because it would stretch us too thin for a decent way of life.

NotEnoughKnittingTime · 12/11/2025 06:37

nearlylovemyusername · 12/11/2025 02:51

twins and triplets are excluded from cap, read the policy.

There is no such thing as accidental pregnancy these days, MAP if available as a last resort. It's fecklessness

Only for one of them if you have two children already.

Grapewrath · 12/11/2025 03:30

They should direct more money at decent school meals and breakfast clubs.
This will not be popular decision

Eviebeans · 12/11/2025 03:27

Zitroneneis · 11/11/2025 07:29

The cap should remain, especially now as the country is in so much debt.

I do agree with this
However I also think that more directed help should be provided to children who need it
I am not sure that lifting the cap would give much relief to children directly as the small amount of money generated from that is likely to just be absorbed into the overall family budget
I always feel sad that there are kids who are excluded from after school activities due to finances and I think that would make a bigger direct impact on their lives so would provide that

nearlylovemyusername · 12/11/2025 03:11

HappyGilmorex · 11/11/2025 17:31

https://ifs.org.uk/articles/economic-consequences-uks-ageing-population

Crib sheet for those not recognising the fiscal disaster that is an ageing population with insufficient young people working to pay for it.

About 1mn of 16-24 yo are NEETs now, it's 12.5% of this age group. Being NEET is a very strong predictor of spending lifetime unemployed and on benefits. They will not contribute to anyone's pensions.

We don't need to increase numbers of young people, we need to improve their education and employability. Supporting families on benefits having more children will not achieve this.

Don't you see the irony of denying free childcare to families with one parent on 100k and forcing them to subsidies UC recipients with multiple kids?

SoftBalletShoes · 12/11/2025 03:10

nearlylovemyusername · 12/11/2025 02:48

Labor raise taxes not to provide better public services but to fund more handouts.

There is a limit as to how much taxes you can raise before you make economy collapse.

UK unemployment rate rises more than expected to 5%

Unemployment is now higher than in coved times and wages stagnating, this is after a few years of booming market, all thanks to Labor.

And yes, you absolutely can improve NHS without extra funding, but you need strong management, the level of inefficiencies and waste there is astonishing.

I've often heard about huge amounts of waste and inefficiency in the NHS, but is that really true? I'd be surprised. It wouldn't make any sense for managers to run it that way. (I can look it up.)

Why do you blame Labour for unemployment and wage stagnation? They inherited one hell of a mess.

I agree you can't raise taxes too much, but raising a little from most people would help society a lot, whether child poverty, NHS, schools, etc.

SoftBalletShoes · 12/11/2025 03:04

nearlylovemyusername · 12/11/2025 02:51

twins and triplets are excluded from cap, read the policy.

There is no such thing as accidental pregnancy these days, MAP if available as a last resort. It's fecklessness

I didn't know that. It's not something that readily comes up when you Google it.

Maybe it is fecklessness, but that doesn't change the fact that there are children in poverty. It's not their fault that their parents had them.

nearlylovemyusername · 12/11/2025 02:56

Differentforgirls · 11/11/2025 21:12

Probably for another thread but I think it should be funded. Being a parent who parents full time. It’s better for the children. Rather than letting strangers parent them. Dropping them off first thing then picking them up last thing and putting them to bed isn’t parenting imo.

Funded by whom exactly?

nearlylovemyusername · 12/11/2025 02:51

SoftBalletShoes · 12/11/2025 01:45

Maybe two kids IS plenty, but what about all the children who are already here and who are suffering from the drop in household income caused by the cap? And what about people whose second child turns out to be twins or even triplets? And accidental pregnancies? People should not be forced into abortions that they do not want. That is cruel.

Edited

twins and triplets are excluded from cap, read the policy.

There is no such thing as accidental pregnancy these days, MAP if available as a last resort. It's fecklessness

nearlylovemyusername · 12/11/2025 02:48

SoftBalletShoes · 12/11/2025 02:37

Raising taxes in order to provide better public services such as better schools and healthcare, and lifting children out of poverty, are GOOD things!

Presumably you want a better NHS? How do you think that can be paid for without raising taxes? The fact that taxes aren't high enough is why we're in this mess.

Labor raise taxes not to provide better public services but to fund more handouts.

There is a limit as to how much taxes you can raise before you make economy collapse.

UK unemployment rate rises more than expected to 5%

Unemployment is now higher than in coved times and wages stagnating, this is after a few years of booming market, all thanks to Labor.

And yes, you absolutely can improve NHS without extra funding, but you need strong management, the level of inefficiencies and waste there is astonishing.

SoftBalletShoes · 12/11/2025 02:41

winterbluess · 11/11/2025 07:41

Absolutely not. If children are living in poverty, the only people to blame are the parents that had them knowing they can't afford to look after them!

So the children can just carry on living in poverty, then?

And it's not an if. Look it up. Over 30 percent of children live in poverty, 18 percent of them in absolute poverty. That's a lot of children suffering. And removing the cap would lift 600,000 children out of poverty, according to the IFS.