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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Do you think we should life the two child benefit cap?

758 replies

Marshmallow4545 · 11/11/2025 07:16

I believe that the majority of people think that the cap should remain and child poverty should be tackled in different ways.

Personally I would like to see children on FSMs allowed free access to after school extracurricular clubs and activities. I would also provide more poor families with access to food banks and would look to stock these with a range of healthy and nutritious options either through donation or state funding if required. I would also look to recruit volunteers to offer advice on health and diet in these places. I would provide clothing and school uniform banks with high quality, second hand clothing that kids would actually want to wear. I have some branded 'fashionable' stuff my kids have grown out of that's still in great condition that I would happily donate.

All of the above in my view is preferable to lifting the cap and would be more effective in tackling the impact that child poverty has on the child.

So AIBU that the two child cap should remain and we should look at other more direct ways to tackle child poverty?

OP posts:
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Differentforgirls · 12/11/2025 10:47

BigAnne · 12/11/2025 10:46

I was referring to your comment that unless you parent full-time you're not parenting. I assumed you were referring to stay at home parents.

What's that got to do with you calling me a lazy scrounger?

Nnnbs · 12/11/2025 10:47

I was a SAHM mum. But DH earned enough to look after all of us and we never took a penny in benefits

BigAnne · 12/11/2025 10:46

Differentforgirls · 12/11/2025 10:35

Me? My children are 34 and 29. I'm retired!

I was referring to your comment that unless you parent full-time you're not parenting. I assumed you were referring to stay at home parents.

MaturingCheeseball · 12/11/2025 10:38

Plus the extra burden on the NHS if the country is saying it’s fine to not work and have multiple kids.

Nightlight8 · 12/11/2025 10:36

CorneliaCupp · 11/11/2025 15:47

It doesn't

If you think with the cost of rents and paying childcare upfront isn't a detterant to adding a 3rd child in this shocking encomy I would seriously question your parenting! Lack of services to get an appointment. I don't know why you wouldn't consider money it's common sense!

Differentforgirls · 12/11/2025 10:35

BigAnne · 12/11/2025 10:29

The goady smug poster doesn't mention that she's happy to have an afternoon nap while working mothers are subsidising her and her children's health care, education etc and the CB she receives. A proper lazy scrounger.

Me? My children are 34 and 29. I'm retired!

Nightlight8 · 12/11/2025 10:32

UsernameMcUsername · 11/11/2025 14:02

On balance no...I'd make at a three child cap, but that's it.

Schools are skint, SEND is broken, CAMHS is overwhelmed, affordable housing is non-existent in most of the country. There are so many needs. And at some point parental responsibility is a thing. And that includes paternal responsibility- I bet at least 50% of child poverty can be traced to useless sperms donor 'fathers' and I'd love to see the state shake them down properly. So many men seem to not pay a penny.

THIS

EasternStandard · 12/11/2025 10:31

Differentforgirls · 12/11/2025 10:27

Reported.

You did say this about the op?

BigAnne · 12/11/2025 10:29

Marshmallow4545 · 12/11/2025 10:11

Honestly don't rise to it!

This is the same poster that thinks that all work is 9-5pm. They merrily call posters lazy whilst they enjoy a 2 hour nap in the afternoon. Goady doesn't cover it. Don't let their posts influence how you feel. Ignore and rise above the nonsense.

The goady smug poster doesn't mention that she's happy to have an afternoon nap while working mothers are subsidising her and her children's health care, education etc and the CB she receives. A proper lazy scrounger.

NotEnoughKnittingTime · 12/11/2025 10:29

Differentforgirls · 12/11/2025 10:25

Judgmental? On THIS thread? 😂The cap will be getting lifted in Scotland regardless.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cdezyrpgez3o

That is something extra. They can't lift it properly without Westminsters say so. I suspect Scotland doing that has made it even more likely Labour will end it.

Differentforgirls · 12/11/2025 10:27

Marshmallow4545 · 12/11/2025 10:11

Honestly don't rise to it!

This is the same poster that thinks that all work is 9-5pm. They merrily call posters lazy whilst they enjoy a 2 hour nap in the afternoon. Goady doesn't cover it. Don't let their posts influence how you feel. Ignore and rise above the nonsense.

Reported.

OnlyTheBravest · 12/11/2025 10:26

No I do not think the cap should be removed, especially during a cost of living crisis without exploring other policies first.

Maybe free school meals for all children with vouchers to used for food items only during school holidays. Maybe scrap child benefit entirely to fund it. Establish local farms/vegetable patches etc to grow food and direct people struggling to find jobs to work there.

Those who choose to homeschool could be given the equivalent in food vouchers, so they don't miss out.

Differentforgirls · 12/11/2025 10:25

Jijithecat · 12/11/2025 09:53

This is so horrifically judgemental. I can't even put into words how this makes me feel.

Judgmental? On THIS thread? 😂The cap will be getting lifted in Scotland regardless.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cdezyrpgez3o

Stock image of a woman with her back to the camera looking at two children on swings.

Scottish government to end two-child benefit cap from March

Families affected by the controversial UK government policy will be able to apply for payments from early next year.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cdezyrpgez3o

Marshmallow4545 · 12/11/2025 10:11

Jijithecat · 12/11/2025 09:53

This is so horrifically judgemental. I can't even put into words how this makes me feel.

Honestly don't rise to it!

This is the same poster that thinks that all work is 9-5pm. They merrily call posters lazy whilst they enjoy a 2 hour nap in the afternoon. Goady doesn't cover it. Don't let their posts influence how you feel. Ignore and rise above the nonsense.

OP posts:
verybighouseinthecountry · 12/11/2025 10:10

HermioneWeasley · 12/11/2025 09:22

The cap was not retrospective so anyone who had more than 2 kids (excluding multiple births) did so in the knowledge it would apply.

people need to start taking responsibility for their decisions. There is free contraception and more or less abortion on demand. There is no reason to have more children than you can afford and I am not more responsible for your kids than you are.

Exactly this, there was advanced warning about the cap, children were not "thrown into poverty". I know from talking in my community that this definitely made people think about having a third child. People need to take accountability for their actions, and that includes family size.
One community who have been badly hit by the cap is the ultra orthodox Jewish community in North London. They are disproportionately reliant on social welfare, yet will continue to have more DC for religious reasons. Last time I did training the average number of children was around 5, but 12 DC isn't unusual either. It's a real shame, but ultimately their parents have put them in this situation.

Julen7 · 12/11/2025 10:01

Marshmallow4545 · 12/11/2025 09:34

Surely the cap will just be reimposed in a few years when a new government gets in. How is this helpful for the families involved? It just adds uncertainty and will get them used to a level of income that will be rapidly whipped away.

Yes it will be reimposed by next govt. It’s not being implemented until September 2026 anyway so likely will only be in place for 2.5 years.

Jijithecat · 12/11/2025 09:53

Differentforgirls · 11/11/2025 21:12

Probably for another thread but I think it should be funded. Being a parent who parents full time. It’s better for the children. Rather than letting strangers parent them. Dropping them off first thing then picking them up last thing and putting them to bed isn’t parenting imo.

This is so horrifically judgemental. I can't even put into words how this makes me feel.

TwinkleTwinkleLittleBatgirl · 12/11/2025 09:48

Agree @Happymondai, but not agreeing to being taxed further, working more, so more payouts re bfclub, after school care etc so people who aren’t working can get handed more money is as ever eeeevvil! 🙄

Happymondai · 12/11/2025 09:45

Marshmallow4545 · 12/11/2025 09:38

I think if it's only been lifted for a few years then they could just reintroduce without too many issues.

I honestly don’t get why so many people are supporting bringing back giving thousands of pounds a month to someone with 15 kids at a time when taxes are increasing for everyone else!!

because I’m too lazy to type I will copy and paste my essay from earlier yet again (seeing as none of the pro giving thousands to someone with 15 kids has responded to it yet)

I doubt labour will ever be voted in again, declaring this the same week as tax rises will piss a lot of people off, especially with the current public opinion on immigration when most big families are from other countries.
I think a two child cap is reasonable and I say that as someone who was on benefits for years and had a child at 16 (so a complete scrounger 🤣) once or twice fair enough but how did you not learn your lesson the third time??
You can’t expect working taxes payers to fund your platoon of children and not feel resentment, who’s jealous of someone on the dole with a platoon of kids? I’m sure the op could choose to do that herself hell we all could but the economy would crash.
Personally I think free coil fitting centres in every town should be available (I recently found out the place in my town that used to do this has shut and the nearest one is miles away) then there’s no excuse and before you mention twins, twins have always been exempt from this policy

And on another added side note I think it’s possible to live on the money you get for two kids with three kids, hand me downs and room sharing permitted

Nightlight8 · 12/11/2025 09:39

RubySquid · 11/11/2025 16:27

As pointed out before its the child allowance of UC that's capped. Thats £300 pound a month per child. Not to be sniffed at.

My kids didn't cost that per month each

Sorry yes you are correct. It is a lot of money I was thinking of the CB not the UC child element approx £300. It is a lot of money and I can't imagine where it would come from. I don't think it should be lifted.

Marshmallow4545 · 12/11/2025 09:38

Happymondai · 12/11/2025 09:36

If anything like the first time it was done it would only apply to children born after it was applied

I think if it's only been lifted for a few years then they could just reintroduce without too many issues.

OP posts:
Happymondai · 12/11/2025 09:36

Marshmallow4545 · 12/11/2025 09:34

Surely the cap will just be reimposed in a few years when a new government gets in. How is this helpful for the families involved? It just adds uncertainty and will get them used to a level of income that will be rapidly whipped away.

If anything like the first time it was done it would only apply to children born after it was applied

EasternStandard · 12/11/2025 09:36

MaturingCheeseball · 12/11/2025 09:27

I am FUMING about the strong rumours today that the cap will be lifted.

Don’t forget that the benefit also applies to children resident abroad, so some people could claim for any number of children, genuine or fictional.

Before someone inevitably says “But we need them to be future taxpayers….” - vast numbers are not working and will never work. The purpose of girls (presumably 50% of any children) is to marry and have many children, just perpetuating the benefit and indeed child poverty problem.

Having four children, reasonable enough. But continuing to produce 10 or 12 is not conducive to lifting your family out of poverty. It’s a way of life financed by schmucks.

Will they be future taxpayers? There might not be enough jobs for a start.

Agree on generally a bad call

Marshmallow4545 · 12/11/2025 09:34

Surely the cap will just be reimposed in a few years when a new government gets in. How is this helpful for the families involved? It just adds uncertainty and will get them used to a level of income that will be rapidly whipped away.

OP posts:
Nightlight8 · 12/11/2025 09:32

MaturingCheeseball · 12/11/2025 09:27

I am FUMING about the strong rumours today that the cap will be lifted.

Don’t forget that the benefit also applies to children resident abroad, so some people could claim for any number of children, genuine or fictional.

Before someone inevitably says “But we need them to be future taxpayers….” - vast numbers are not working and will never work. The purpose of girls (presumably 50% of any children) is to marry and have many children, just perpetuating the benefit and indeed child poverty problem.

Having four children, reasonable enough. But continuing to produce 10 or 12 is not conducive to lifting your family out of poverty. It’s a way of life financed by schmucks.

It's been on BBC Live this morning. It's such bad timing to lift the cap. I think having 4 kids in this economy isn't reasonable at all. You really would need to be providing a decent dual income to provide for all 4 kids. It does sound as though it will be lifted!

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