DSis is skimping on Christmas because she’s obsessed with her Skye trip?

Gifts are not tit for tat and what on earth does what you gave LAST year have to do with this year?

Entitlement is an ugly trait.

OP your sister is not “obsessed” with her Skye holiday, she is simply prioritising that over the Christmas present exchange. Why does that matter? You clearly have more than enough means to buy what you want for yourself.

Second thread today where an OP expresses shock that other members of their family aren't prioritising their present over a holiday. WTF is in the water?!

I think so too op.

What she might have wanted to say was that she can't afford to match what you did last year, and felt bad at the time, so it's a diplomatic way of asking you not to do the same again - using her trip as a cover for raising it.

Just scale right back, and buy yourself what you'd have loved her to have got you with the difference.

I have my DD presents got but i havent even thought about sis in laws or mil. So if they told me no gifts no problem. If you have an online order cancel. Unless you got gifts in september most if not all shops have 28 day return.

but have you actually bought all her Christmas presents for this year already? Sounds as if you haven't, otherwise surely you'd have said 'but I've already bought them lots' rather than banging on about what you got them last year, which is completely irrelevant.

If you haven't got anything yet, then just agree. Spend the extra money on treating yourself, and get something you'll definitely like rather than only maybe. Win-win.

If you have already bought her presents, then fair enough to be a bit annoyed, and send her a mildly narky message about wishing she'd told you this earlier, but then just return them/keep for yourself or give to someone else/spread them out so you give 1 thing for christmas, something else for her next birthday, etc.

You can't insist people spend money on you if they don't want to.

Buy her an umbrella, she’ll need it on Skye

Nah, usually too windy for umbrellas up here.

Good for her. She'd rather spend her savings on a holiday, why not?! She's given you a month's notice, that's perfectly fine. If you've bought her anything then return it. I'd buy a tub of quality street for them. Count yourself lucky to start dialing it down with the gifts.

I thought the same thing. Same person trolling I reckon. 😂

Op bought all her tasteful and expensive gifts in last year's clearance sales 😄

Last year is last year. This year is this year. She’s setting an expectation of a small budget for presents, so you won’t need to get anything expensive for her, just as she won’t be doing for you. It’s fine.

Why? Surely 6+ weeks notice is plenty?

You sound rather grabby.

Entitled and materialistic come to mind.

Yes, I'm struggling with the idea of "big Isle of Skye holiday" it's hardly Vegas.

(I'm biased because some of the most miserable hours/days of my life have been spent on Skye).

You bought her exploding glitter, didn't you?

This suggestion is way too sensible and straightforward for MN! 😁

It should be 'March round her house and ask how bloody dare she try and save money?'

Can you just ask her what the budget is and match it - and then use what is left from what you usually spend to get some extra bits for you and your family ?

The general principle isn’t cheeky - it’s just pants saying it now so near to Christmas when you may have bought presents already.

Fine in theory, except last year she happily accepted the tasteful and expensive pile of gifts I bought for them both

That was last year, though. Presumably, last year they spent more money.

This year, you don't have to get them "a tasteful and expensive pile of gifts" because this year they'd rather not spunk a load of money on shit nobody needs.

If you've already bought them expensive stuff for this year, either return it or give it to someone else.

You're being utterly ridiculous.

How early do you buy Xmas gifts?

You have 45 days. How much notice do you need? Six months? A year? Two years ago last Tuesday?

As others have said this is the second thread about friends or family wanting to spend less on gifts, and I can only see that as a good thing. It's your presence that matters OP, not your presents!

Buy her an umbrella, she’ll need it on Skye. If you’ve already done your shopping will the gifts not suit someone else? I can’t see the drama to be honest she’s letting everyone know in advance.

I’m simply pointing out that DSis set a precedent.

What precedent?!

If she wants a low key Christmas, that's fine-it's not for another 7 weeks! Just return what you've bought or give it to someone else!

Put some money inside a card for their holiday! All sorted! Simple and easy.
She has told you well ahead of time, so it is not like you bought her a £500 gilft and got a £2 card only, which may sting a bit.

I'd guess that there weren't many hits among the "tasteful and expensive presents". It's hard to get gifts for adults right and IME, unless it's something very specific that you know the recipient wants, tasteful will often mean clutter I don't want or need.

Just be glad not to have to do it any more.