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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Roundabout priority (with images 😁)

79 replies

candyflossbabe · 10/11/2025 13:16

AIBU for arguing back with a man who tried to confront me (4 minutes later further on down the road btw) about my actions on this roundabout?

Roundabout near(ish) to me has line markings which I appreciate can cause confusion, as they do seem to contradict normal roundabout protocols of which lane to be in for the exiting past 12’o clock rules. However, my understanding is if you are leaving ‘your lane’ then the responsibility falls on you to ensure the lane you’re moving in to is clear. I am also aware roundabouts should allow for those coming off at the exit but I feel the lane markings here clearly show the lanes people should be in, as this wasn’t a case like most where the lines end and it becomes two into one merge type thing with a shared duty of care etc

Won’t go in to the details about the confrontation itself (unless people are really bored and want a story time 😂) but we had a minor near miss, he was effing and beeping then caught up with me further down the line and went off again before I unloaded my own verbal backlash.

So as not to mess people around being ‘ambiguous’ I’ll state I was in the blue car and he was in the red. There was a green car next to me.

The lane markings can’t be seen very well on google maps so I have made them clearer.

I suppose the AIBU isn’t really about my response (because tbh that’s my own business if i want to get in to it with another person*), but was I in the right with the driving as I do genuinely accept if I’m wrong then I’m wrong 🤷🏻‍♀️
I don’t think I’m the kind of person to get in to an accident for the sake of ‘being in the right’ but I suppose my carrying on without expecting him to want to cut across me wasn’t something I anticipated so probably could do with self reflection for future reference as the direction I took isn’t my normal route (I’m normally in the green car lane which is nice and simple 😂)

You are being unreasonable = You didn’t have right of way and were in the wrong
You are not being unreasonable = he was in the wrong

*I appreciate in advance anyone advising me/others not to get into disputes with men for risk of danger etc 🥰

Roundabout priority (with images 😁)
OP posts:
DeepfriedPizza · 10/11/2025 15:06

You might have been in the wrong lane but the responsibility is on him for not checking his lane is clear. You should always assume every other driver could potentially make a mistake and be prepared for it.

Abusing another driver for an inconsequential mistake is never OK

TimeForTeaAndG · 10/11/2025 15:05

Those lanes on the roundabout are bananas! If the 5/6 approach go into the right-hand (red car) lane then they can only go fully round the roundabout!

But, the man was wrong and shouldn't have been leaving the roundabout in your lane.

Turboislander · 10/11/2025 15:03

The problem with this roundabout is that there are barely any lane markings left on it anymore. OP is completely correct in what she did but angry man wouldn't have had obvious road markings to follow so it would be a bit more confusing for him than you might think from looking at the first photo. He's still wrong though and shouldn't have been trying to exit with her on his left in the position she was (correctly) in or behaving like a overgrown toddler afterwards.

Periperi2025 · 10/11/2025 14:59

I think if you ignore the green lane and consider that to be an anti congestion upgrade for the cars entering from the road in the top left corner, and assuming that the main road is bottom left to top right (ie straight on but with a slight kink), then OP was correct, angry man was incorrect and a aggressive arse as well.

OnlyOnAFriday · 10/11/2025 14:59

So basically yes he was in the wrong lane to exit but it’s possible your earlier driving caused that issue if you pulled out in front of him.

Didkyle · 10/11/2025 14:57

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OnlyOnAFriday · 10/11/2025 14:57

Seeing as you entered from the 6 o’clock point and state you have no clue where he came from I can see a o this could have been your fault. If he was already on the roundabout and approaching from your right which he must have done I think you should have let him pass before joining the roundabout. He would then have had opportunity to move over into the lane to exit. If that’s what happened but it ties in with him being annoyed.

unless you let him pass and then joined the roundabout but in which case he’d have been in front of you and able to move over?

StressedLP1 · 10/11/2025 14:56

It looks like a spiral roundabout and red car was in the wrong lane if he didn’t want to continue round the roundabout.

Original poster
candyflossbabe · 10/11/2025 14:55

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😆

are you new GIF
OP posts:
bridgetreilly · 10/11/2025 14:51

You were fine. He should have moved over into your lane before the previous junction.

Didkyle · 10/11/2025 14:51

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Genevieva · 10/11/2025 14:50

If he joined the roundabout one turn ahead of you then he has priority and you should have waited for him to pass before joining the roundabout.

Original poster
candyflossbabe · 10/11/2025 14:47

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Also you:
”Didkyle · Today 14:06

Please tell us about the verbal backlash op!!”

You basically did the equivalent of shaking the bucket of Llama feed, then accused me on mumsnet of all places (where lets be honest it’s all for a bit of entertainment in some form another - myself included) of being a drama Llama - jfc 😂😂

If it wasn’t at all obvious most of this post IS dramatic, but it still doesn’t mean I’m not open to listening and learning as while I am more than comfortable calling out men (im talking about the red car driver!) who are misogynistic w⚓️’s - I’m also not omnipotent and can be wrong so figured I could kill two birds with one stone so to speak.

OP posts:
Didkyle · 10/11/2025 14:36

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Original poster
candyflossbabe · 10/11/2025 14:33

Didkyle · 10/11/2025 14:23

Sounds like these exchanges between the pair of you were quite dangerous given concentrating on screeching at each other rather than being in control of your vehicles!

Edited
Show quote history

whoop there is it 😂

asks for details of interaction
shames op for interaction

I mean I still wouldn’t use my mobile phone while stationary at lights with handbrake on, but I’m hardly leaning out the window at 60mph effing and blinding, the only “dangerous” thing was my insults 🤭🤭🤭🤭

OP posts:
Didkyle · 10/11/2025 14:23

candyflossbabe · 10/11/2025 14:13

Immediately after the round about we were in traffic where he was just leant on his horn and effing and blinding at me out of his window, then a couple minutes later, well down a whole other junction he pulled up next to me at traffic lights and continued the abuse at which I retaliated with equal obscenities as, rightly or wrongly by that point he was just being an obnoxious jerk as it was hardly a life threatening near miss (would have been a tiny bump if we did and would have been his front end into my rear as I was already ahead of him) and his behaviour was unhinged for that small an incident.

Show quote history

Sounds like these exchanges between the pair of you were quite dangerous given concentrating on screeching at each other rather than being in control of your vehicles!

OtherS · 10/11/2025 14:21

You're in the right, red in the wrong. I presume he wanted to cross into blue lane to exit and found you there, but you had every right to be there and he needed to wait for you to pass whilst indicating, or go round again. Doesn't even appear to be a very complicated setup from this angle, though maybe it's more confusing when you're on it? Was he slightly ahead, meaning you were in his blind spot? He sounds like a young (or maybe just terrible) driver who hasn't learnt to be thoroughly aware of his surroundings. Or maybe he was aware of you being there but expected you to let him in - which maybe you should have to be considerate, but you don't have a duty to, and he should be prepared for that. Either way he's in the wrong and he's a dickhead. Little men really don't like women not yielding, I've had them shout at me for not letting them through those priority road islands when they're literally sitting right below the arrows showing my right of way 🙄 And god forbid I'm ever quicker off the mark when merging... I hope you had the last word!

Original poster
candyflossbabe · 10/11/2025 14:16

Youcancallmeirrelevant · 10/11/2025 14:11

I know that roundabout, both lanes go towards the m32, as one lane ends up being for each direction on the motorway plus a couple of other splits. I think you have ended up in the wrong lane, where you started (right lane) you should have ended up on right lane as you went round and so either going straight over at next roundabout or right onto m32 into city centre. If you wanted to go towards M4 or turn off you should have been in the left lane as you joined the roundabout

Ah see this is where I believe you are mistaken, it’s actually a 3 lane roundabout at the 10 til one position if you look at the road markings - I think this may also be where he has made the assumption.
As i stated in my original post and showed the lane markings, I wonder if people’s blind belief of how a roundabout works overrides their capacity to take in to account lane markings 🤔🤔

OP posts:
Original poster
candyflossbabe · 10/11/2025 14:13

Didkyle · 10/11/2025 13:55

So you pulled over for the verbal backlash?
or you shouted from your car?

Edited

Immediately after the round about we were in traffic where he was just leant on his horn and effing and blinding at me out of his window, then a couple minutes later, well down a whole other junction he pulled up next to me at traffic lights and continued the abuse at which I retaliated with equal obscenities as, rightly or wrongly by that point he was just being an obnoxious jerk as it was hardly a life threatening near miss (would have been a tiny bump if we did and would have been his front end into my rear as I was already ahead of him) and his behaviour was unhinged for that small an incident.

OP posts:
Youcancallmeirrelevant · 10/11/2025 14:11

I know that roundabout, both lanes go towards the m32, as one lane ends up being for each direction on the motorway plus a couple of other splits. I think you have ended up in the wrong lane, where you started (right lane) you should have ended up on right lane as you went round and so either going straight over at next roundabout or right onto m32 into city centre. If you wanted to go towards M4 or turn off you should have been in the left lane as you joined the roundabout

WeirdyBeardyMarrowBabyLady · 10/11/2025 14:11

It’s a roundabout with a two lane exit which means green and blue absolutely right. Red should be staying on the roundabout until the following exit at least.

MolvolioPortesque · 10/11/2025 14:08

I cba to read who did what, but a person berating you for something they think you have done wrong is a twat.

Didkyle · 10/11/2025 14:06

Please tell us about the verbal backlash op!!

Original poster
candyflossbabe · 10/11/2025 14:05

Adding a few more images
I came from blue, I honestly don’t know where red car (or green tbh) came from as I wasn’t focusing on individual cars just my awareness of other vehicles in general if that makes sense.
Ive tried to include the road markings best I can from a street view perspective but tbh they look even worse (worn off wise) than it actually is 😫

Roundabout priority (with images 😁)
Roundabout priority (with images 😁)
Roundabout priority (with images 😁)
Roundabout priority (with images 😁)
OP posts:
user2848502016 · 10/11/2025 14:03

Assuming I have understood properly you and the green car were both in the right lanes to exit the roundabout at the exit just after the lines. The red lane is for carrying on around the roundabout. So the guy in the red lane should have moved out to the blue lane before passing where you entered the roundabout at, so that you had to give way to him

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