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My Father was convicted of sexual assault on 17 year old, should I let him see my kids + MORE

310 replies

Lordvampire3 · 09/11/2025 21:37

Hi Everyone,

This is extremely hard to post and I am looking for other insight of whether I am being unreasonable.

My Father was convicted and due to be let out of prison for sexual assault of a 17 year old (in the UK this is over consent age so wasnt charged as child offense)

My DP and I made the decision that he would not see our 4 kids when he leaves prison due to what he has done. I was talking to my brother today and they exploded saying I was being out of order to not let him see his grandkids because of what he did

Am I being unreasonable? For context 3 of my children are girls, 11 9 and 4 and out little boy is 3.

I have been talking to him once a week and havent found the courage to say he wont see them as I worried about the fallout, plus selfishly I didnt want to be the cause if he didnt something stupid inside (like off himself etc)

Any help would be appericated

OP posts:
CarefullyCuratedFurniture · 09/11/2025 21:55

I would not be allowing my children to be around a convicted sex offender. If your brother is happy to allow that for his own children, well, thats his choice. I think you are absolutely right.

Bigcat25 · 09/11/2025 21:53

It might be ok if they are fully supervised, never alone with him. Sorry eta I take that back but wasn't able to delete. This is above my pay grade; leaning towards not having them around him.

Evaka · 09/11/2025 21:53

Yeah, I'd be putting an ocean of distance between us. He's a violent sex offender.

Lordvampire3 · 09/11/2025 21:52

youalright · 09/11/2025 21:44

If you want a relationship with him I'd let him see the kids supervised by yourself at all times but it would depend on the actual backstory of the assault

So I dont know the full details of the assault as he hid the fact he was going to court so I wasnt able to attend.

From what I have been told he change a time to met her Grandmother so they could be alone and that when the assault took place, but I only have his side of what happened in that time

OP posts:
AintNoPunshineWhenShesGone · 09/11/2025 21:52

The fact his poor victim was 17 is neither here nor there.

I wouldn't allow him contact with my kids even if she was a fully grown woman.

Summerlovin40 · 09/11/2025 21:51

Your father was imprisoned for sexually abusing a CHILD ( under 18) and you're wondering if he should be around your children?? I'd also be concerned that your brother thinks it's normal behaviour...

Burningbud1981 · 09/11/2025 21:50

Keep him away from your children

DramaQueenlady · 09/11/2025 21:47

Id say keep them away. Good you've kept in touch, i couldn't have. As for your brother he has no say in how you parent your kids.

magicscares · 09/11/2025 21:44

You are absolutely in the right here. Trust your gut & keep your children safe.

youalright · 09/11/2025 21:44

If you want a relationship with him I'd let him see the kids supervised by yourself at all times but it would depend on the actual backstory of the assault

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