AIBU to think this tutor has an attitude?

I tutor at postgraduate level and I agree fundamentally with the majority of opinions expressed by the posters here.

The tutor is an expert in his field. You should show him some basic respect as such. Would you argue with a medical expert or surgeon if they expressed an unwelcome opinion? Probably not. In fact its you who comes across as having an "attitude" here. All this background information about losing a laptop charger and your son oversleeping is disrespectful. It makes you sound disorganised and indicates lack of basic preparation for the session. I am not surprised that your son has a chaotic learning style and an inability to master the basics of history.

No doubt you want the best for your son. However you are doing him no favours by ignoring advice about his skill set and attempting to push him into a subject for which he has little ability. The tutor is giving you sound advice. Wake up and smell the coffee!

I have sent the tutor a sample mind-map template my friend uses with her class as I thought it might help him see what I mean. He hasn't replied yet, which again is frustrating.

He's probably busy counting to several thousand and deep breathing to calm himself, whilst also trying to compose a semi-polite reply.

I would also say the warfare part of the GCSE history course is awful and uninteresting - and she hated it too. It needs a different approach to note taking - some kind of table of themes. Cold War is so interesting and is usually taught in year 11 and not year 10 so your DS may just be learning it now.

Honestly, I don't think history is for your ds for all the reasons you yourself have already mentioned and the feedback from the tutor.

Philosophy and ethics are also essay subjects. If his history is this weak with his supposed interest in it, then Philosophy and Ethics are likely to be worse.

Economics has some maths content and there is still also an essay element to it. This might be more suitable if his maths is good - and he is interested in economics, of course.
(As an aside, economics at degree level has a lot more maths content. Some universities take a maths a level instead of or in addition to an Economics a level)

Hopefully you have paid attention to the 99% of people saying YABU.

Tutors leaving sets off alarm bells for me; it suggests they know they'll get nowhere with your DS and have got out before it affects their reputation. You commenting about jumping between Elizabethan England and WW1 suggests you don't know about the modular aspects of the exam, so I think you are in much of a position to criticise.

I think the tutor has attitude because you aren't listening and he's trying to get through to you.

Notes must be taken, whatever lessons are like. In history exams you are often asked to make arguments about a POV that are supported by facts; where are his facts going to come from?

I do appreciate that alternative presentation might help, but revision can't really happen if there are no facts to rearrange in the first place.

If you have specific revision techniques in mind, surely you teach him this? And let the history specialist try to teach him history?

In fairness, in order to be able to help him with a mind map for his history topic, OP would need to know the content - but that's kind of the whole problem here. The DS doesn't know enough yet to begin revising it.

A tutor cannot teach your son how to revise because every person revises in different ways. Although it sounds as if your son isn't revising at all and that you are both blaming everybody , teachers ,school , tutor for your son's lack of application.
A tutor teaches you the subject, a tutor tries to supplement and complement in school learning. He can't do that because your son doesnt seem to have learnt anything to complement.

Half a tutor session because he got up late?

Thought he had done cold war in school when he hadn't. WHAT WAS HE DOING IN CLASS ALL WEEK? How is that even possible.?

Tutor isn't telling you how to parent your child.
He is telling you that your child hasn't a hope in hell of passing an exam because he is doing shit all work either at school or for the tutor.
Your son is playing you and you are lapping it up. Swift kick up the arse needed which would probably have better results than tutoring.

Hi @SoCloseToNothing1981
my DD got a 9 at GCSE A* at A level and has just graduated with a 2:1 in History from a top uni. I too am a historian with similar grades.
Her tips are that she has always attended all lessons and lectures; done her reading and made copious notes. Then as the exams approach she re reads her notes from lectures or lessons, and condenses the key points on to index cards. She then reads those and then condenses further until all the course key quotes dates are on a small set of cards. I used to test her on these cards (Alevel) and she would know everything . She would also do timed essays at home from past papers as the exam approached.

If you have specific revision techniques in mind, surely you teach him this? And let the history specialist try to teach him history?
Unfortunately it sounds like history is not a good match for your son, and 3 tutors so far have thought the same. How's his working memory and auditory memory? He may struggle to recall facts when being talked at. Is he able to remember specific things? This is something can practise and improve if it's something you feel is an issue.

This is totally unacceptable behaviour re the laptop charger and oversleeping. I pity the tutor.

I'm not sure you understand what History actually requires - you seem obsessed with revision techniques, specifically memorising dates. Even if your son is able to recite every specific date relevant to his study (which seems unlikely if he's not only taking notes but confused about what's gone on in lessons) this won't be enough at GCSE or at A Level if he can't put together arguments and analyse sources. These are all things that can be learned, but it takes time and application.

And there's the crux of the problem. You can tell people things but you can't make them learn, and if your son is this profoundly disengaged from the subject now, it's going to need a lot of turning around and an attitude change from him. Not liking his teacher is not a reasonable excuse. You say your son desperately wants to do History but if he's not engaged with the teaching he's getting at school, I can see why the tutor doesn't think he's going to singlehandedly pull off a miracle. Most teachers wouldn't think that was possible, which is why GCSE History isn't taught through a few months of frantic 1-1 flashcard-making.

The revision techniques ARE important and will come later op. He has to cover the material first.

It's like you are trying to travel to Ibiza and saying we are telling you to ditch your bikini because we are saying "no, no op, don't put it on at the airport: you need to get on the plane first."

I agree revision techniques are important but only if you have adequate subject knowledge.

There is simply no point in the tutor teaching your son how to revise if he doesn't know the course content. Your son should know what he was doing in lessons this week and you need to be more frustrated with him, than the tutor

So if he does well in other subjects, revision is not the problem, is it? If he finds mind maps etc useful then he would already be using them - but not everyone does.

What jumped out at me from your first post was the reference to your son struggling because he isn't good at remembering dates. History, especially at A level, isn't really about being able to remember dates - it's about being able to research, analyse, and draw conclusions from facts. I fear that both of you may have a fundamental misperception of what is involved in both GCSE and A level history.

Why don't you just show your son how to do a mind map OP? Or flash cards. I'm sure he will have come across those things at school, they won't be completely new to him.

If your son enjoys history but isn't up to the academic challenges of studying it at A level then I think you should remind him that he is always free to read around historic subject for pleasure but at school he needs to choose subjects he can pass. My son wants to study Spanish as one of his A levels but his school might not run it if they don't get the numbers. I have reminded him that he can carry on learning his Spanish using duo lingo and it can be a life long learning project. He doesn't have to do it at A level.

Are you sure that A levels are the right route for your son? Has he looked at other courses run at colleges or trying to get an apprenticeship? - although I believe that they are very competitive.

If he can’t cope with history ALevel he won’t cope with Philosophy and Ethics. It’s a subject which needs a lot of reading and analysis and essay writing. A bit like history, really.

Exactly.

A mind map isn't some "secret code" to unlock a drawer-full of completed essays.

It's a way of marshalling material that has already been covered and understood by the student.

I wouldn't say the tutor is the one with the attitude....

If you knew the revision techniques yourself, OP, would you be able to write the essays? Or do you think you might need to know the material first?

It sounds like you want a single magic trick - mind maps or whatever - to get your son through.

The truth is there is a magic trick: putting in the work. If your son doesn’t do that, no revision strategy can save him.

Not taking notes, not paying enough attention to know what he’s studying, not working through the questions, turning up late, blaming everyone but himself……these are the problems.

How is your son going to revise stuff which he never learnt in the first place?

The thing I found arresting was the child not knowing his current History topic, i.e. not just about it, but what it was. I tutor VCE (Level) English in Victoria and at the interview stage I ask their texts and the order they're being studied, also their last exam result. For context I've never encountered a school where this info wasn't available before the start of the academic year. All of this is so I can do a tutor's job: supplement the learning in school.

In my experience, those who answer "don't know" to very basic questions never ever make it to the end as tutees. And not because they don't need it.
In this case it's worse; he didn't know he didn't know.

But can’t you see that if people genuinely think this is a wind-up, your approach must be wildly off the mark here?
And surely you must understand that before even considering revising a subject, i.e testing your knowledge of it, you need to have some actual knowledge first? You’ve glossed over that he mixed up the Cold War with unknown, and that he doesn’t write any notes. So what would he be revising?

I sorry but he just doesn’t sound very academically-minded at all, and I’m not sure Economics would be a good move either. What are his genuine strengths? Sometimes we just have to accept we’re not good at something we would like to be.

Your first priority should be for your DS to have a complete set of notes that covers his history syllabus - without these what will he revise from?

Does he have a school history textbook?