MIL not sleeping over our house being too cold

as a grandparent to be i am upset for your mil, assuming she isnt normally like this

Basically @lilseb , stop faffing with turning it on and off and messing with expensive heaters. Just set your thermostat somewhere between 18 and 20 with the boiler timed to come on when needed from just before you get up to around bedtime (assuming someone's home all day) and then forget it. You'll probably save money as the house will hold residual heat and you'll save on ridiculously expensive space heaters.

Your poor baby... it's not even that cold yet outside. I can only imagine what Jan will be like.

So...the house is 16, and occasionally drops below that to 14/15, and if it does then you boost it back up to 16?

MIL is right, that's bloody freezing. If the house has been at around 15 say, pushing it to 16 isn't warming it up at all. 16 overnight is fine, but during the day that's just miserable.

Plus, you're not saving money using electric heaters to heat a single room.

It does not seem like many commenters have a clue that current recommendations from NHS, Lullaby Trust, etc. state that 16-20 degrees is the ideal room temp for babies with regards to safe sleep. (A recommendation based on over 2 decades now of SIDS research.) If you have a room thermometer in the room you sleep with baby in that shows the room temp is within that range (including as low as 16 degrees), and your baby is dressed accordingly, and you yourself are able to get enough sleep, as is your husband, then you are doing everything right mumma. Ignore the MIL and these commenters, who aren’t clued-up on safe sleep recommendations it seems. My husband’s family are Turkish and come from a culture that loves to overdress babies, seemingly because they can’t understand that it’s sometimes safer to feel cooler than warmer. No way am I going along with that nonsense, increasing SIDS risk, just to appease them/their comfort. Also, we don’t “catch a cold” FROM the cold - we catch one from germs and then cooler outside temperatures can exacerbate our symptoms by irritating our already sick airways. If I were you I’d just print of safe sleep recommendations regarding temperature and hand them to her, and ask her if she’s ever heard of the sad but true idiom that cold babies cry, hot babies die.

You tell your mil way too much about your lives.

I said earlier that 16 degrees is too cold. We do actually have our thermostat set to 16 overnight, but the difference is that it has been significantly higher all evening so there is plenty of residual heat. The problem with the OP's house is that it is freezing all day as well!

So I think 16 overnight is fine.

Heating up to 16 (i.e. implying the house has got colder than 16 overnight) isn't fine with a baby, but is fine for adults providing there are cozy blankets etc.

I would want the house at least 16 all the time during the day if you're in. I see it sounds like you're saying that is the case. I would say 18 is a more normal temperature to keep the house if you are in. I set my house temperature to 17 for the day which I know is chilly, but I would up it to 19 at least for guests, often 20.

I agree with your MIL . A temperature of 16 is prob just about adequate ok when the baby is fully dressed and in sleep bag. However, while that is ok for a sleeping baby, if they are awake and out of their cot, it is too cold. Also, the recommendation from Lullaby trust is that they should wear one more layer of clothing than you are. If they are unclothed, such at bathtime, the room needs to be much warmer. Being too cold can impact babies immune system.

16 is ok as a sleeping temperature (but is the lower end of optimal for a baby) but bear in mind that’s with your baby in those layers, and you under duvet. It’s therefore obviously too cool for the daytime. If finances are an issue then you just have to do your best and make sure you all keep warm, but if not you need to get that thermostat up!

I expect it probably gets colder than that overnight if you are only boosting it to 16 degrees in the day.

If the thermostat is set at 16 that is the maximum the house is going to get to. There will likely be substantial periods of the day when the room temperature drops at least a couple of degrees below 16. However well insulated a house is, heat escapes.

We use our heating the same way i.e. only on an hour twice a day but the temperature is set at around 20, so that the house warms to that temperature and then once the heating turns off, it remains around 16-18.

I am not surprised MIL is concerned.

This is just silly. We used to live without running water, electricity, vaccinations.....etc etc. Just because we used to doesn't mean it's fine to do so now.

I live in the Nordics where we let babies nap outside in their prams in winter, well wrapped up, for short periods of time. But our homes are kept much warmer in winter than you describe. More like 20C.

I think you should speak with a health worker. I remember the advice on sleeping temperature caused me a lot of anxiety because my baby was born in a heat wave!

The general advice is that baby needs one extra layer than you to stay warm, and feel the top of their chest to make sure they are warm but not sweaty. Good luck.

16 is cold. Mine’s normally about 20.
Is your husband tight or is he genuinely worried about money ? Take it you’re on mat leave.
Gas and electricity are expensive.

16 degrees is bloody freezing! I’ve just come downstairs and my thermostat says it’s 20 degrees in our house and the heating hasnt been on. I’m surprised your house is so cold already - it’s only been mild so far.

Yes it's mad. I grew up with one coal fire in the living room and a paraffin heater at the top of the stairs. It was cold & miserable. The day we had CH installed was a joy!

ah you're married to my BIL. We wear thermals when we go round. House is far too cold but he's a tightward too.

your house is too cold
your DH is a controlling arse and I expect not just about this
your MIL is right

delusion that it's somehow character building to live in a damp, cool house.

so true. You see that a lot on here. People are somehow proud that they are stingy and live in a cold house.

i dont blame your mil
16 is too cold for babies and asthmatics

I agree 16 is far too cold to be comfortable.18-20 much
ore normal!

Your house is too cold for a baby - especially an immobile one - turn the heating up to at least 17 degrees. Check that the radiators have been bled and are fully functioning.

I grew up in a country that had no CH and we were constantly cold at home, relying on small bar heaters, fan heaters or in latter years a portable gas heater when these become popular and cheap. Even the cat and dog used to huddle around the heaters.

It was not fun being cold, I do not have the nostalgic memories of some on here, nor was it character building. It was just bloody cold.

I also had a lingering cough in the winter months as a child and adult which I put down to breathing in the even colder air at night once the heaters were off. Once I moved to England nearly 25 years ago the cough stopped in the winter time, and has never reoccurred. I put it down to the warmer overnight temps due to having CH.

Remind your tight-fisted DH that everyone’s health and comfort could possibly suffer in a very cold home, let alone developing a mould problem.

I don’t visit stingy people who refuse to put the heating on.

If you're getting damp and mould at 18 degrees there's something wrong with your lifestyle or your house that's causing it. That's far from normal.

I think 16 C is fine overnight for bedrooms

In the day I think rooms "should" be around 19C if they are rooms you are sitting around in. Possibly 20 C