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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Dirty sink.

144 replies

Flowersforyourchocolateprettyplease · 07/11/2025 10:25

If you're a cleaner or housekeeper, how do you feel about this:

Stay at home mum of two, kids at school all day. Very capable, no medical issues.

Leaves milk out opened, dishes on the side of the sink, teabags in the sink.

Dirty kitchen towel on the floor.
Obviously have to pick the towel up to clean the floor but clearing the rest seems to be enabling her to do more mess.
Easy option is to get another job of course, which I'm looking into, but how to deal with this day to day.
First thing when coming into work is being confronted by this scene everyday.
YABU- just clear up.
YANBU- An adult should be able to do bare minimum and put stuff back/bin.

OP posts:
lottiegarbanzo · 07/11/2025 10:53

You do what you’re contracted to do. End of story. If your contract is that you will only clean perfectly tidy areas, you remind the client of this fact and perform your contracted role to the best of your abilities.

You've been hired as a cleaner, not a life coach. ‘Clearing the rest seems to be enabling her to do more mess’ is an INCREDIBLY inappropriate and judgmental view to be taking.

rookiemere · 07/11/2025 10:53

She may be ND and genuinely not see mess. I mean it’s not like she’s leaving shit stained toilets or dirty knickers on the floor.
Do your job in the time you have. If you find it upsetting then drop her as a client, but it sounds like she really needs your services!

Hoppinggreen · 07/11/2025 10:52

I have a cleaner but I don't expect her to tidy

Original poster
Flowersforyourchocolateprettyplease · 07/11/2025 10:49

Itiswhysofew · 07/11/2025 10:45

What's she like to you personally? Many people are just not aware of mess. My in laws live in a tip. My DM is one of the tidiest people you'll meet.

She's ok, but has a bit of down looking about her, which she'd never think herself to be.

OP posts:
Original poster
Flowersforyourchocolateprettyplease · 07/11/2025 10:48

Valhalla17 · 07/11/2025 10:39

Well maybe that's why shes hired you? She cant keep on top of it and doesn't manage it well, so shes got help in and is paying for it.

She can though if she chooses to. She won't do it if a friend is coming over.

OP posts:
Original poster
Flowersforyourchocolateprettyplease · 07/11/2025 10:47

Mydogsmellslikewee · 07/11/2025 10:36

So do you go in and work for them everyday?

when I win the euromillions and employ a housekeeper, I’m never doing a thing again. Including putting my teabags in the bin (not that I will ever make my own tea again, I’ll have a little old man with a teapot following me about the grounds).

If she’s paying for housekeeping everyday, she probably has the same thinking.

Haha, but he would be in charge of disposing said teabags, milk etc.

OP posts:
Original poster
Flowersforyourchocolateprettyplease · 07/11/2025 10:46

OvernightBloats · 07/11/2025 10:31

Don't think this is too bad. What was the agreement when she hired you for the job?

Towel on floor is very scruffy. If this is the worse thing you have to tidy, I don't think it is too shocking.

If the toilets are left in a state, I would draw a line at that and leave the job.

No tebags were mentioned 😅. Loos are hit and miss (excuse the pun) but overall ok.
I will be leaving, it's how to not let this cause a red mist every time I come in.

OP posts:
Itiswhysofew · 07/11/2025 10:45

What's she like to you personally? Many people are just not aware of mess. My in laws live in a tip. My DM is one of the tidiest people you'll meet.

Original poster
Flowersforyourchocolateprettyplease · 07/11/2025 10:44

Not sure why the teabags grate so much. I've cleared everything else in the past and left just them as they're in the smaller sink bowl.
I see it as hiring a receptionist and expecting her to hold the phone to your ear sorr of thing.

OP posts:
DingDongJingle · 07/11/2025 10:41

Mydogsmellslikewee · 07/11/2025 10:38

He will wear a bow tie and a hat and tell me stories of London in the olden days. I’ll treat him well and get him a stocking at Christmas. I’ve really over thought this 🤣 in reality, the kind of chap and the stories I want, the poor bloke would have to be about 112 years old, so it’s firmly a fantasy.

Edited
Show quote history

I really hope that one day you achieve your dream! 😂

Valhalla17 · 07/11/2025 10:39

Well maybe that's why shes hired you? She cant keep on top of it and doesn't manage it well, so shes got help in and is paying for it.

Mydogsmellslikewee · 07/11/2025 10:38

DingDongJingle · 07/11/2025 10:37

I love that you specifically want your tea maker to be small, elderly and male 😂

Show quote history

He will wear a bow tie and a hat and tell me stories of London in the olden days. I’ll treat him well and get him a stocking at Christmas. I’ve really over thought this 🤣 in reality, the kind of chap and the stories I want, the poor bloke would have to be about 112 years old, so it’s firmly a fantasy.

DingDongJingle · 07/11/2025 10:37

Mydogsmellslikewee · 07/11/2025 10:36

So do you go in and work for them everyday?

when I win the euromillions and employ a housekeeper, I’m never doing a thing again. Including putting my teabags in the bin (not that I will ever make my own tea again, I’ll have a little old man with a teapot following me about the grounds).

If she’s paying for housekeeping everyday, she probably has the same thinking.

I love that you specifically want your tea maker to be small, elderly and male 😂

Mydogsmellslikewee · 07/11/2025 10:36

So do you go in and work for them everyday?

when I win the euromillions and employ a housekeeper, I’m never doing a thing again. Including putting my teabags in the bin (not that I will ever make my own tea again, I’ll have a little old man with a teapot following me about the grounds).

If she’s paying for housekeeping everyday, she probably has the same thinking.

Chasingsquirrels · 07/11/2025 10:35

Can't vote really.

Of course said person "should" be able to do these things, but they have engaged you - presumably so they don't have to.

DingDongJingle · 07/11/2025 10:35

Some people are just messy. I wouldn’t really think anything of it, I’d just decide whether I was willing to do the job or not.

AgentPidge · 07/11/2025 10:34

I think some people just don't 'see' mess. Or they know it's there but they don't care, either because they grew up in a house like that, or the opposite (obsessive cleaning) and they're rebelling.

DH leaves the milk out. His DM does it. If I put it away, minutes later it's out again. He leaves teabags to drain in the sink because he doesn't squeeze them and doesn't want tea in the food bin.

OvernightBloats · 07/11/2025 10:31

Don't think this is too bad. What was the agreement when she hired you for the job?

Towel on floor is very scruffy. If this is the worse thing you have to tidy, I don't think it is too shocking.

If the toilets are left in a state, I would draw a line at that and leave the job.

Original poster
Flowersforyourchocolateprettyplease · 07/11/2025 10:28

Don't mind the milk, jam, butter etc but the tebags in the sink and towel on the floor grates so much!
Trained in a different field and this was meant to be a little side thing to get me out of the house, but could be a sign I'm not cut out for it.
On the whole, enjoy the job as I'm a natural homemake. Thanks.

OP posts: