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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think therapy culture is turning self-reflection into self-obsession?

188 replies

MirrorFatigueJay · 06/11/2025 21:18

It feels like we’ve gone from under-feeling to over-analysing everything. Not every discomfort is a trauma. AIBU to think constant introspection can actually make people unhappier?

OP posts:
WorriedMillie · 06/11/2025 21:54

mindutopia · 06/11/2025 21:52

If therapy is making you think every discomfort is a trauma, you don’t have a very good therapist.

Was just about to post this!

Facecrime · 06/11/2025 21:53

I think lots of selfish, self obsessed people use the language of therapy to excuse their behaviour. Its got nothing to do with any process of actual therapy.

mindutopia · 06/11/2025 21:52

If therapy is making you think every discomfort is a trauma, you don’t have a very good therapist.

Jellycatspyjamas · 06/11/2025 21:51

MajesticWhine · 06/11/2025 21:31

I am a therapist, and I am not sure there is a therapy culture. Most people can’t afford regular therapy and they have to contend with long NHS waiting lists. There may be a small number of people who have therapy but don’t need it. If by therapy culture you mean people spouting about self-care on Instagram, then yes that can be self-obsessed and it’s not necessarily making people happier.

Absolutely this, from another therapist. Good therapy can be transformative but therapy speak shite on TikTok and Insta aren’t helping anyone, and that’s before we get to people telling their darkest secrets to ChatGPT.

Sugarnspicenallthingsnaice · 06/11/2025 21:51

I'm not exactly sure if it's what you meant, but a trend I've noticed over the last 10 years or so is for some people to want to label themselves and their actions/feelings, and announce those labels to everyone at every opportunity.

Whether it's mental health, neurodiversity, gender, sexuality, politics etc, everyone's looking for a tribe to fit into.

I don't think it's necessarily a bad thing that people who maybe feel they aren't quite 'the norm' are able to find the words to describe it and connect with other people who can relate. You can tell the ones who've completely fallen into the online rabbit hole though.

IsntItDarkOut · 06/11/2025 21:49

I have a friend who is big on therapy and thinks everyone should have it. She tells me she regularly cries through sessions. She’s generally an unhappy person who feels hard done by with everything and is extremely rigid about things. I’d say it hasn’t worked for her.

dayslikethese1 · 06/11/2025 21:44

I'm sick of all the tripe that pops up on my Instagram about loving yourself or whatever. And people using the word 'boundaries' to mean having zero obligations to others in any way at all.

Samccc · 06/11/2025 21:37

In some cases yes I do.

MajesticWhine · 06/11/2025 21:31

I am a therapist, and I am not sure there is a therapy culture. Most people can’t afford regular therapy and they have to contend with long NHS waiting lists. There may be a small number of people who have therapy but don’t need it. If by therapy culture you mean people spouting about self-care on Instagram, then yes that can be self-obsessed and it’s not necessarily making people happier.

BlueIndigoScarlet · 06/11/2025 21:27

While I generally think it’s a good thing for society to be more open and accepting of mental health issues I have concerns that there is now a generation of people who expect to be “happy” ALL THE TIME.

They think that any amount of boredom, stress, worry, anger sadness is indicative of “damage to their mental health” as opposed to just part of normal human experience.

It’s totally fine to be sad, angry, a bit worried stressed sometimes. It’s NORMAL.

I’m also not at all sure that spending lots and lots of time thinking about yourself and how you feel is actually that healthy.

Go read a book, do some exercise or some volunteering. Get outside in nature etc etc. Mostly you’ll feel a bit better afterwards.

Handeyethingyowl · 06/11/2025 21:21

People didn’t ‘under-feel’ before they just bottled it up.

theunbreakablecleopatrajones · 06/11/2025 21:21

Well any extreme behaviour isn't good, so yes obviously it can.

ladyofshertonabbas · 06/11/2025 21:20

i agree.

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