To think therapy culture is turning self-reflection into self-obsession?

I think there is a huge lack of ability to self reflect actually. So many people are so emotionally immature, have absolutely no self-awareness and are completely unable to properly reflect on their actions, behaviours, responses to things etc. You can see it on here everyday.

Hm, I wasn't sure about your first post, but I can agree with this.

It's perhaps an unreasonable bugbear of mine, but I hear so many folk say that they're overstimulated. I am autistic, and yes, I know that being overstimulation isn't just reserved for those of us privileged enough to get a diagnosis, and people can feel overstimulated, but it feels like the phrase is just bandied about by people who are perhaps mildly overwhelmed, a bit stressed, could actually benefit from some therapy so that they could organise tasks in a way that is less stressful, or perhaps just review the way their life is working.

It makes me hate admitting to people that I am overstimulated when I am on the verge of an explosion or a catatonic like shutdown. A true nervous system dysregulation response that is completely beyond my control by the point the overstimulation has hit.

I get it that being clambered on by your kids, or constantly hearing mum, mum, mum can get really grating especially when you've not had 5 minutes to have a piss on your own, or drink your tea while it's hot, and there are genuinely times where the world feels completely on top of you, but I do also think that there's a lot of pathological language used to just describe the normal day-to-day stressors (that absolutely do need to be addressed, and people deserve to be able to reach out for help) that over-egg the situation they're in and undermine people with actual pathological struggles.

Depends on the case I think…..

There is a reason most spiritual systems encourage people to overcome ego and let go of things. It's almost the opposite of what people think is the path to happiness now, navel gazing, protecting their identities, dependence on others affirmation.

I appreciate the therapists here who think proper therapy is great, but in my observation, it's a very mixed bag. I've seen some good therapy for adults, almost none of the kids I've seen go have benefited. I think a lot are harmed.

It is. As is understanding why people think and behave the way they do. No?

I see a counsellor. I am also an outwardly very positive, affable, friendly, enthusiastic friend, wife, mum & volunteer. Someone who regularly exercises, socialises, and absolutely notices the benefits from the healing power of nature, fresh air and walks etc.

I actually did have a relatively traumatic childhood which has never been explored, and have suffered terrible losses. I have children of my own so I am "doing the work", and have a keen interest in psychology after studying it at college. I've always paid privately because I can afford it and it helps me. I am now worried I bore my mates with "therapy speak" though 🙃

I do agree that we are as a nation in the UK tipping over into over-pathologising everyone and don't think it's healthy.

Chatterbox with lots of bright ideas who interrupts sometimes? ADHD.

Upset because someone told you off? Rejection Sensitivity Disorder.

Quiet and introverted, prefer your own company and happen to have a particular hobby you're passionate about? Autistic.

Enjoy cleaning and like your house spotless? OCD.

Worry about totally normal things that need worrying about? Anxiety.

So yeah, I agree we shouldn't be sticking a label on everyday normal behaviours and attitudes, but disagree therapy isn't helping those who need it.

An interesting post. I have felt a bit concerned about the prevalence of "navel gazing" - it is interesting also in the context of the emphasis on children developing resilience, which I find quite harsh at times. The two don't really seem to tally.

However, I have just, somewhat reluctantly, started working with a counsellor to help me deal with the long illness and subsequent death of my OH - and the position I found myself in of having to opt to allow him to die. This was 5 years ago and I still feel guilty/confused etc. so I thought that for the sake of my family I needed to offload all this somewhere else and try to become a cheerier person for their benefit.

So - I do think there are situations where therapy is a reasonable decision. I am hoping it will be the right one for me.

This.

people just don’t seem to be able to cope with the ups and downs of every day life……

Basic maths is. Beyond that though there are definitely skills which would be more useful. I think if they did away with GCSE maths and replaced it with GCSE understating the world/common sense it'd probably benefit more people.

There is no therapy to be had anywhere on the NHS.

What is therapy speak?

🤣 for whom is maths not helpful?!?

I agree with this.

Although it's as much about social media as it is about therapy. I think there are people who genuinely believe these influencers who live perfect lives are for real and as a result that their normal life is actually a life filled with trauma, failure and heartbreak because they aren't backpacking round Thailand with their kids.

Surely basic maths is a life skill?

Maths isn't helpful for everyone but it still gets taught.

There was a post recently from a lady who’d realised she liked women and after a particularly fulfilling therapy session, told her dh. I think you’re so spot on op, while of course it’s needed, it means we start seeing life all about addressing our issues and needs, and forget about the rest of the world

CBT is not helpful for everyone though.
Having done DBT a few times, I think some aspects of that would be good to be taught in schools.

Ah, I see.
I get what you mean there (I think). It seems a lot of normal human interactions are getting pathologised on SM. Saying there are red flags when there are none etc.

I think if the basics of CBT were taught in school – that thoughts lead to feelings which lead to behaviours but that you can change/disrupt the process – then you'd have much more self awareness within a couple of generations.

I'm not talking about giving children therapy, but helping them to understand how and why people think the way they do; it should be popular subject!

So essentially you don't like it when people use words they don't understand.

Perhaps teens could start every sentence with 'I'm in puberty so...' in much the same way many women do with their peri/menopause status.

This.

I think most people spouting crap on TikTok about their mental health have probably never been near an actual therapist and have just self diagnosed via social media.

It’s the same with bloody perimenopause, it’s great that there is more awareness but everyone on social media seems to be suffering from it, they get younger and younger too, soon we will have perimenopausal teens.

Where?
Certainly not the UK where you can wait months and years for NHS therapy. And it does not get offered for naval gazing and introspective shite to post on Tik Tok. Some people take their own life whilst waiting for therapy.

Everyone uses therapy-speak now. I think it's doing real damage to young people, seeing only the worst of everyone and thinking it's because they're so aware and self-reflective or whatever. I see it in a lot of young people labelling the actions of even passing acquaintances as red-flags etc

Agreed. Also, what therapy encourages constant introspection?