Sister has inherited huge wealth. Help

I would explain that you need to distance yourself from her as you are not in the same position as her and her tactless acts are upsetting you especially with you struggling.

Might be through her late husband?

Ask her for money. My sister would ask me and I her.

Although if I came into a million, I'd give my sister a quarter without question.

Hidinginthelootoo

If I came into money which ever way it was I would always think to give some to my family. Your sister is thoughtless.

A very good way to put it.

Further, some people are being nasty about the OP suggesting that her sister may be on the spectrum but it really is only very recently that Autistic Spectrum issues in women have been taken seriously. And if the sister does have ADHD then financial impulsivity is known to be a problem, which is a worry in this situation. No one is saying "Oh so if she is spending her money she must be ND", but simply suggesting that if she is then she may need extra support to make sure she doesnt a) blow the lot or b) get scammed.

I think op, I'd sit her down and just say to her that you're genuinely really happy for her that she's got this security in her life now and that she and her child won't have to worry about making ends meet, but that you're worried she's not maybe thinking about how she might be coming across when she's talking about her spending with people who are on a tight budget and that if she's not careful that could start to affect her relationships and you dont want that to happen because you love and care about her. If she's not very self aware I'd maybe think of some examples to give her to help clarify it.

Oh do stop behaving like a twat.

If she has multi millions why on earth isn’t she helping family? It would be the first thing I would do but I guess we are not all the same. I’m not surprised you are finding it hard to watch, has she got a history of being completely tone deaf and tactless?

Yanbu to feel this way. Don’t fake oohs and ahs anymore, just say nothing. If she questions why you haven’t said you like the latest purchase, just say you struggle to get your head round spending that much money because it’s way more than you can afford.
Also stop doing her favours when she’s clearly ungrateful and can afford a gardener etc.

There’s no way I could inherit multi-millions and watch my family members live in poverty.

Come on. IF this is even true - why does OP need to say anything? Her sister can't be so obtuse she's not aware of how much her behaviour would be grating to those around her.
Seems to me she's not interested in helping out her immediate family, otherwise she'd have already done it, like I feel most normal people would want to. She doesn't care what impact her behaviour is having or she wouldn't be doing it.
Money does change circumstances and relationships, vast wealth creates an imbalance. There will always be that divide now.
Either suck it up or leave sister to her own devices.

Of course your jealous. You are human. Who wouldn't feel like that?

Do you think I’m taking about cash sitting in a bank? What would you do with £10m? I’m far from a financial expert but I’ve a fair amount of experience with managed investment portfolios, with minimal input from myself and an acceptable level of risk - under the guidance of my FA.

A holiday home is unlikely to generate any income, as I’m betting the sister has bought it just for personal use and won’t be renting it. And housing is expensive and time consuming to run and maintain. Absolutely nothing wrong with wanting a holiday home and there are definitely worse things she could be spending money on (like sports cars!) but I really doubt that this purchase is part of her long-term investment strategy (that she definitely doesn’t have).

I can’t believe she hasn’t given some of the money to you all though? The first thing i would do would be to help my family out.

Apparently the £ amassed via prudent investment by a middle manager. I’d be tapping up his financial adviser. It’s a lot of money for a seemingly average Joe to rack up.

How did Sis live before & was £ inheritance a surprise? This & when he died make a difference too.

If she's that rich, she could well have bought the home and car out of income. Even at only say 3%, £10m gives an income of £300k pa.

If you have millions to invest, leaving it in cash to earn interest is the last thing you should do with it.

You have no idea where the holiday home is so how do you know it's likely to be a poor investment? Most property in UK tourist spots would surely have been an excellent investment historically.

Money might make you financially secure but does it make you happy? How many lottery winners have found it a poisoned chalice? You need a purpose to live eg work and that's not spending money on meaningless stuff. Buying an expensive bit of jewellery might make you happy for a day or to but what then - another expensive bit of jewellery?Did billions save Steve Jobs who died aged 56? I'm certain he would have given it all up to live. Enjoy what you have and stop looking at what your sister is doing.

It’s not blowing it but it’s unlikely to have been a prudent investment, not many holiday homes are. But the OP has described constant excessive spending, not just the holiday home.

In an ideal world, she wouldn’t be touching the capital, and should aim to live off the interest in order to pass the bulk of it onto the children. There’s still plenty of scope to enjoy herself and have a good lifestyle within that.

It’s not blowing it but it’s unlikely to have been a prudent investment, not many holiday homes are. But the OP has described constant excessive spending, not just the holiday home.

In an ideal world, she wouldn’t be touching the capital, and should aim to live off the interest in order to pass the bulk of it onto the children. There’s still plenty of scope to enjoy herself and have a good lifestyle within that.

I don't know why people think buying a holiday home is blowing it?

She's entitled to have some fun with some of it (car) and the holiday home is surely investing in property in a way that will benefit DC now and in the future.

I agree she shouldn't be rubbing people's noses in it, but otoh shouldn't her family be pleased for her? The fact that they aren't maybe explains why she's doing what she's doing.

I wouldn’t be so sure. You say the amount is in excess of £10m, so I’m assuming it’s not more than £20m? That’s not enough to guarantee generational wealth unless fairly prudent with it.

In spending £300k your sister has spent close to her annual withdrawal rate in 1 day. If she carries on like that then the principal will become depleted.

Your OP says she inherited through sad circumstances, but it doesn’t sound like they actually are sad.

It’s time to stop helping out so much with DIY etc, and maybe you could mention to her that your parents are short of cash and might appreciate some help financially before she burns through her £10 million. Don’t ask her for money for yourself, suggest she helps out your parents, that might prompt her to think about how she’s throwing money around whilst some of her family are not well off.

Honestly, I can’t imagine inheriting £10m + (especially from a shitty ex!) and not sharing it with my loved ones.

I think I would have to say to her along the lines of whilst you are both sorry for her sad loss and happy that she is financially secure, it is extremely difficult for the rest of the family and yourself to struggle so much and have to see how much she is spending. You could ask for money or you could not, but you could tell her that her extravagance is insensitive and unfair to you all. It may be that her spending is a knee jerk reaction to her loss and she will calm down with the spending once it has sunk in what she now has

It’s her ex she hated and who hid money from her in the separation , the op says both her sister and her child with the ex are glad he’s dead. She isn’t grieving, she’s just bought a holiday home and a sports car.

I agree with others that people run through £10m every day and the sister risks losing it all, she really needs to invest a few m and not touch it for her child’s sake.