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Original poster

Sister has inherited huge wealth. Help

561 replies

Hidinginthelootoo · 06/11/2025 16:09

My sister has inherited huge wealth... multi millions. Through sad circumstances.
Myself, my younger sister and our parents are all struggling money wise, due to poor pay (work two jobs to try to help), sister is divorce, parents just pensioners. I am trying so hard to be happy for her as she spends spends spends, one day she spent £300k! I try to oo and aa over what she buys, but I'm dying inside and drowning at home. Please help me be more positive, or explain nicely how it's making me feel without ruining our relationship.

OP posts:
ScribblingPixie · 06/11/2025 16:48

I would just say to her something along the lines of, I'm happy you're having fun with your money, you deserve it after what you've been through rather than feigning excitement at her big spending.

Bruisername · 06/11/2025 16:45

People saying share the joy - that spending isn’t joyful if she inherited it in sad circumstances. In fact deep down I suspect she’s very unhappy and the spending a facade. Show some kindness to your grieving sister and she may rebalance

Deebee90 · 06/11/2025 16:44

I’m guessing her husband or partner has passed away and that’s why she’s inherited. In which case maybe the spending is her way of grieving. Just be there for her if that’s the case and when the time is right suggest therapy .

WallaceinAnderland · 06/11/2025 16:43

I once spent over £300k in one day too.

sunshinestar1986 · 06/11/2025 16:43

Hidinginthelootoo · 06/11/2025 16:09

My sister has inherited huge wealth... multi millions. Through sad circumstances.
Myself, my younger sister and our parents are all struggling money wise, due to poor pay (work two jobs to try to help), sister is divorce, parents just pensioners. I am trying so hard to be happy for her as she spends spends spends, one day she spent £300k! I try to oo and aa over what she buys, but I'm dying inside and drowning at home. Please help me be more positive, or explain nicely how it's making me feel without ruining our relationship.

Tell her let's share in the joy and buy as all houses?
Pay of some debts etc
Multimillionaire you say?
Some people do not know how to share ttt

louderthan · 06/11/2025 16:43

She is a selfish cow. If I had anywhere close to that amount of money the first thing I'd do would be help my family and friends.
Unpopular view on Mumsnet but hey ho.

diddl · 06/11/2025 16:42

I wouldn't expect a handout but I als wouldn't expect it to be thrown in my face.

QuenchedSquirrel · 06/11/2025 16:41

It all depends on your relationship with each other really.

If I came into a massive sum of money my siblings would receive none of it. And it would be the same if they did - I wouldn't see any of it. We are not on any kind of terms and don't see each other at all.

But in other families, close and loving ones, no one would be able to imagine a scenario where they don't share some of it.

So, it all depends which kind of your family yours is closest to.

Dunnocantthinkofone · 06/11/2025 16:41

Sad circumstances could easily lead to her throwing herself into a spending frenzy as a diversion from grief
Unless she’s always been selfish ,shallow and self absorbed??

NeverDropYourMooncup · 06/11/2025 16:41

waitam · 06/11/2025 16:22

I'd have to say something, probably because I couldn't imagine being like her in similar circumstances in a million years!

Maybe put it to her that it would be nice for Mum and Dad to have a little comfort now since they brought you up and made sacrifices. It may trickle down. If she is blind to your family's circumstances and does not make a contribution I'm afraid I would have to cut ties. You could not tolerate being around that level of blindness to other's circumstances, particularly when she actually TOLD you of her good fortune.

Anyway, what goes around comes around.

What good fortune? The OP says sad circumstances, so it sounds as though somebody has died.

youalright · 06/11/2025 16:40

I'd keep my mouth shut until I'd recieved my Christmas present then say something. Now is not the time to risk falling out with a multi millionaire

Umy15r03lcha1 · 06/11/2025 16:40

Wow, the money won't last long at this rate. Let's hope the stuff she's buying has a decent resale value. She might need some of it back in a couple of years.

AnneLovesGilbert · 06/11/2025 16:39

I need to know what the £300k got her.

Sartre · 06/11/2025 16:39

Unless on property, 300k in a day is insane. She needs to rein it in before it dries up. She also clearly lacks self awareness knowing you’re all poor and not giving you all a few thousand.

slightlyunimpressed · 06/11/2025 16:39

Bruisername · 06/11/2025 16:36

She said sad circumstance

Show quote history

And the title says ‘inherited’ so probably not a lottery win.

LeavesTrees · 06/11/2025 16:38

Money often goes to the thoughtless selfish types.

Anything you say or do will just be interpreted by her as jealousy.

She sounds unpleasant. She can’t be that sad if she’s splashing the cash like it’s water.

Leave her to it.

Appleseason · 06/11/2025 16:38

I think being blunt is the only thing you can be:
’dsis, is there anyone else you can show these things off to? Not that I am begrudging you treating yourself but it is very difficult to fathom your spendings as I am really struggling. Please can we talk about things anything other than your purchases? Thanks. X’

VickyEadieofThigh · 06/11/2025 16:38

steff13 · 06/11/2025 16:29

I am not anticipating ever coming into any money, but on the rare occasion that I purchase a lottery ticket, I will fantasize about what I would do if I win the money. My fantasy always includes paying off my brother and sister-in-law's mortgage, paying off my best friend's mortgage, putting money in trust for my kids and my nieces and nephew.

Obviously it would depend on the amount, but for context the current Mega Millions jackpot in the US is $843 million.

I do exactly the same every time I buy a Euromillions ticket! Helping out my brother and his family, friends who are less well off, big amounts to specific, small charities I support, etc.

TinyGingerCat · 06/11/2025 16:37

Hard to judge without knowing the circumstances and how recently this has happened. If her partner has been killed in hideous circumstances and she has been awarded a huge payout I think you might need to cut her some slack before moaning about how little you all have.

Bruisername · 06/11/2025 16:36

justanotherpassword · 06/11/2025 16:35

Or she won the lottery

Show quote history

She said sad circumstance

Bruisername · 06/11/2025 16:36

hairbearbunches · 06/11/2025 16:27

@Bruisername Thanks, I knew it was something like that. In these circs, it is definitely wealth if its multi millions and it's not doing much whispering.

It’s more a comment on old money vs new money

67854568G · 06/11/2025 16:35

What is the background here? It’s highly relevant. You say sad circumstances. Did her husband die? A tragic accident? Life insurance?

Because if any of the above or similar. You just come across as a grasping greedy person. She’s going through a terrible time and all you’re thinking of is her cash, and how you are entitled to some apparently. Dreadful.

justanotherpassword · 06/11/2025 16:35

LuxuryWoman2020 · 06/11/2025 16:26

Probably her husband died

Show quote history

Or she won the lottery

NewJobProblem · 06/11/2025 16:35

You just explain in simple, plain, honest terms, you don’t need to fluff this up.
Sister, I’m really happy for you that you have money to live comfortably now. But please be sensitive to the fact that I don’t have any money and live in poverty. I’m always here for you if you need me, but I don’t need to hear about each and every purchase.

hairbearbunches · 06/11/2025 16:34

PegDope · 06/11/2025 16:29

This happened with my sister.

She had shares in a company that were acquired and she became a multimillionaire overnight.

With is came epic obnoxiousness and entitlement like I've never seen. She keeps inviting me to holiday on her boat or in her Spanish property but you couldn't pay me to go. She spent 15k on a motorcycle even though she hasn't ever ridden one or expressed interest in one. I challenged her and she said "it's all relative, when you have millions 15k is nothing".

It has utterly changed her and her behaviour is so intolerable that I just hardly ever see her anymore.

OMG, that's so obnoxious it's funny. I wouldn't know where to start coming out with rubbish like that even if I won all the money in the world. I'm not surprised you don't see her often.