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Original poster

Does anyone else miss their first boyfriend?

60 replies

ReminiscingPineapple · 06/11/2025 14:35

I split up with my first boyfriend about 8 years ago. We were together for 3 years. We were very up and down due to his MH issues. When things were good they were great and we had some great times together. But whrn they were bad they were awful.

I’ve since married a lovely man and have two gorgeous daughters. But whenever something reminds me of my ex I feel a pang of sadness that things didn’t work out. I would say I think about him most days. I would NEVER do anything about this and I’ve not seen him since we broke up.

anyone else reminisce about an ex a lot? Is this normal with a first relationship?

OP posts:
clearveil · 06/11/2025 14:48

Not at all, he wasn't an evil or abusive person but he wasn't a good boyfriend either, and I never loved him. It was a learning experience and in a sense I was lucky that it happened when it did so I knew what to never accept again and lucky that it ended. I don't hate him he was just kind of spineless and crap.

We used to be on reasonable terms when I'd bump into him in town but since he shouted at me and tried to grab me in a bookshop we'd bumped into each other in when I refused to take his number or meet up with him. I had no interest and I was also engaged by then to my now DH. If I see him now I will avoid, even blank him if I have to,

JudgeBread · 06/11/2025 14:47

Lol no. Meeting my husband evacuated every other person I've ever been with from my brain because he's just so much better suited to me than all of them were.

My first love is a fond memory and nothing more these days.

Original poster
ReminiscingPineapple · 06/11/2025 14:46

youalright · 06/11/2025 14:43

No but I had my first boyfriend at 13 I didn't even like him that much but everyone had boyfriends so I wanted to fit in. If where talking about first love again no as he is now in prison so I feel I had a lucky escape there.

Yes I would say first love rather than first boyfriend then! First serious relationship.

OP posts:
Lennonjingles · 06/11/2025 14:45

Nothing wrong with reminiscing about what could have been, it’s nice to think about the good times . I’m a lot older and sometimes think about exes and the relationships I had back then, I have questions that will never be answered, maybe my exes think the same about me (which I doubt), but I never had any long term relationships before I met my husband.

Original poster
ReminiscingPineapple · 06/11/2025 14:45

Letsgetmilky · 06/11/2025 14:38

Well most of us on mumsnet… our first boyfriends were more than 8 years ago!

how old are you now?

First boyfriend was age 21-24. Met DH at 25. And I’m now 32.

OP posts:
noidea69 · 06/11/2025 14:44

Sounds like you are bored.

Would you like it if your husband still thought longingly about his ex?

youalright · 06/11/2025 14:43

No but I had my first boyfriend at 13 I didn't even like him that much but everyone had boyfriends so I wanted to fit in. If where talking about first love again no as he is now in prison so I feel I had a lucky escape there.

SketchyOtter · 06/11/2025 14:42

Is it possibly part of the unresolved nature of "when things were good they were so good" compared to the bad times? I don't miss my first boyfriend in the slightest, because I can see now that we were fundamentally incompatible in so many ways and I never wonder what could have been. Do you think there's a chance that, without the MH problems or with better treatment etc, you'd still be with him?

Letsgetmilky · 06/11/2025 14:39

So 5 years ago you or he ended it?

and then you met, married and had two babies with your next boyfriend? So you weren’t pining too long for him! 😆

Letsgetmilky · 06/11/2025 14:38

Well most of us on mumsnet… our first boyfriends were more than 8 years ago!

how old are you now?

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