20yo DD was home alone- 2 Proovia delivery came into house and stood over her until she transferred £60 into their own bank account- raging at response

No.
Delivery was to ground floor at a time op would be there to come down and get it. That didn't incur a fee.
They called her, she didn't reply, they said they'd rearrange, she didn't reply.
They turned up and hour early, carried it upstairs (different to order request) and then oh and that's now £60 cos we carried it upstairs.

But she did owe them £60, which OP agreed to when booking the delivery. To be paid to the delivery staff. The fact that she’s a woman and they were men doesn’t change the amount owing. Or the fact that OP didn’t tell her daughter about it. From the delivery person’s POV they are going to get annoyed when people try to dodge paying them the agreed fee. I’m not sure how else this could have played out really.

Yup. And according to some, they should blame their parents for not raising to deal with every possible thing that might arise in life even when they're outnumbered, isolated and less powerful.

So she wouldn't have appreciated being asked to make sure she stayed home on an evening so is sure to be a liar who's trying to get innocent hard working staff into trouble just to cause trouble? What sort of people do you hang out with?

So, if someone scams an elderly person, it's okay because they are over 18?

Wow, I really had no idea that it is okay to threaten, intimidate, extort and coerce people into giving you money as long as you are over 18.

The "things" MNers think is okay just boggles the mind.

@fanothetan - I have skimmed through your posts on here, and I am horrified at what happened to your dd, and by the attitude of the delivery company. What their employees did was extortion - they scared your dd into giving them £60. In your position, I think I would be going straight to the police.

Because of the fact OP has said her daughter wouldn't have reacted well at being asked to take the delivery

OP's own words

You asked why I said something, I quoted you as to why and that's weird of me?

Seriously

I bet you brought this attitude to the company and that's why they just said whatever you wanted to hear

I don't sound deranged but again, you do you

You don't think a 20 yo woman should be home alone because the delivery men turned up angry and intimidating? So again, it's the woman's fault for a man's behaviour.

Well that's what I'm asking. You're blaming parental failure on ops daughter not handling this situation properly, this exonerating the mens behaviour because the daughter should have controlled the situation better. So is this just in this situation or is every instance where a man is aggressive to a woman?

So she's no longer a competent adult who could have handled this better, she's a stroppy immature one who's lying to make Mom feel bad and you know all this because? I mean Op might not even have a 20 year old daughter. She might have a 30 year old son but she's exaggerating for sympathy. Who even knows if it's even a table. Maybe it was a 5 piece suite and a king size bed and she's downplaying the size. What is even the point of commenting if your base assumption is that it must be a woman lying, not a man being a dick because men obviously would never do that?

I expect someone has already called you out for your ridiculous comment, but I’m going to do it too. Most people think of the panic response as fight or flight, but there’s actually four options: fight, flight, freeze or fawn. The other three are fairly self explanatory, fawn is where you placate the threat in the hope that it doesn’t hurt you too much or goes away. One of the best publicised examples being the rape vicim who goes along with it. OP’s daughter was intimidated and panicked. As to why she didn’t do whatever you being so clever and rational and calm under pressure would have done, it is because the panic response comes from the amygdala (cave man survival part of the brain), which send signals that actually block the frontal cortex (rational common sense bit of the brain) and prevent it from controlling things. Basically the survival instinct kicks in and your capacity for rational thought goes out the window. OP’s daughter felt intimidated and scared and she went into panic mode, so she did what she had to do to placate the threat, ie gave into their demands so that they would leave her alone.

Complain to the retailer.

Complain to the delivery company - not via customer service but find the UK based CEO and contact them.

Threaten to tell the media unless they compensate you. It is utterly disgusting

She treats the house like a hotel

You're own words, OP, which is where I got "swanning in and out" from

You're the one making strange assumptions but okay

So two delivery men behave badly, but the real problem is actually the young woman who was on the receiving end of their behaviour. Really?

i dont think she should be allowed home alone. no offense

I don't know why the OP and her daughter are getting a hard time here.

There's a knock at the door. DD answers door and finds two delivery men, with a delivery for her mum. She tells them to bring it up. They do. She is then alone inside the house with two men, one of whom says that she now owes them £60 and must pay straight away.

Of course that is intimidating, and not okay!