‘Just the meat for me please’ Sunday Lunch issue ’

The expectation of getting a whole chicken to himself plus any extras is incredibly rude.

if he doesn’t want to eat the sides, fine, but he shouldn’t expect a bigger portion of the most expensive ingredient because of his dietary choices. He should gracefully accept a standard portion and eat before / after, like anyone else would if they went for a meal and didn’t like all of what was offered.

This isn’t a case where there’s nothing he can eat.

"You are a guest. This is the menu. The budget does not stretch to 'meat piled up'. He needs to learn to be grateful for what he's given and to have some manners. And no I'm serious, if he has a problem, he can bring his own dinner".

Aside from the cost, how is it any different from catering for any other diet?

I’d serve the meat up for everyone and do veg and potatoes family style then everyone gets the same portion of meat but it’s up to him if he doesn’t fill his plate with potatoes and veg

Yes one meal when he can eat less meat and, shock horror, some vegetables. Guy sounds a massive idiot

Seems pretty rude to me to want this at someone’s house not to mention very unhealthy. You need vegetables!

I wouldn’t be buying extra but I do think for 11 I would have opted for an easier option than multiple chickens - pork shoulder is my go to.

which is what i said - OP has no idea which of them (or anything else) he is going to be

It is the absolute height of rudeness to accept an invitation to lunch (niece and sil here) and then to slide in with a demand that extra meat (the most expensive and arguably in demand part of the meal) be provided instead of doing what guests (absent dietry requirements, including veganism) should do: turn up with a small gift for the hosts, eat lunch, offer to help clear up, go home, write thank you note/text.

I think it sounds weird, unhealthy and very very very boring.

Vegetables are delicious, interesting and mostly healthy

He sounds like he is boring as fuck, all gym and no personality.

Can guarantee your adult sons will be taking the piss out of him together behind his back.

I was surprised by a guest once, the partner of a friend we were meeting for the first time. It was all a bit ah hoc, we weren't really expecting an additional person, just Oh's friend dropping in for dinner last minute.

As I was getting dinner ready they came in and asked for just chilli, no rice doing low carb. I said something along the line of I would leave the rice off. Cue a cheeky head to the side and "and replace it with extra chilli" in a single song voice. I reminded them I was already making the meal stretch and would be giving everyone the same. There would be plenty of salad available. They were disgruntled and I didn't give a shit.

It felt incredibly rude to me, I'm not responsible for proving all 2000 calories for an adult person. They arrived with nothing and drank lots of alcohol.

I am happy to cater for special diets and normally offer loads of extras and stuff to take home. I would not be piling one person's plate high in detriment to anyone else. I would probably plate the meat up and leave extras on two plates at either end.

Ok to decide not to have veg/potatoes, not ok to expect to have a double or triple portion of expensive meat in exchange. He needs to accept he gets a portion, then perhaps if there are seconds going he can have a bit more, not demand a huge portion to begin.

Honestly all these bulky gym goers do my head in, its awful for the environment.

Whether he's on a cut or a carnivore diet, it's unreasonable to demand that he only be served meat. I'd just plate up the meat and then let him decide which of the veg he would help himself to. He can deviate from his diet for one meal.

Apart from anything else, meat is really expensive and I'd be pissed off if one of my guests had more than their fair share!

(and no this isn't like catering for a veggie or a gluten free diet - I'd do that with little complaint).

God, I’d hate to be so stingy.
just throw in a couple of extra chicken breasts. It’s one meal.

She wants him to feel welcome, fair enough.

But does she not also want him to make an effort with his fiances family. Do you have to go out of way for him? Can he not go out of way for you & slightly amend his eating habits one day?

I'd stick a massive packet of wafer thin him on his place mat.

My brother went through that stage and it was expensive feeding him, as he'd eat so much meat! I'd ask them to bring his own whole cooked chicken and pork chops, as there won't be enough to pile high on his plate. Not sure why he and his girlfriend thinks people would accommodate this request?! Bit cheeky if you ask me! 😜

I really like your style. Clear, direct, assertive. Well done. Stand your ground.

Surely, the BF out of politeness would eat a few veggies and not expect to follow the carnivore thing 100% of the time.

Has he told SIS that this is all he will eat on the Sunday or is she assuming?

In this case, I would plate everyone's meat up and then let them pick what they wants from the remaining veg and sides

I'm torn. I sort of agree with you, in that the responses would be very different if the BF was vegan. I personally won't cater for vegans so I do understand where the OP is coming from, just from the other side. The double standard is what annoys me.

I mean, given the choice I might quite like an entire plate of roast potatoes and gravy but that would be rude and weird as a guest.

All of those saying It's unhealthy and bad for the gut and very restrictive etc-is he not just on a cut?

I work out, nowhere near competitive level but if I am on a cut I restrict carbs hugely, but anyone cutting doesn't do it allll the time? Vegetables (especially the starchy ones often involved in a roast, which may or may not be braised with something and may or may not require gravy) have carbs too.

I doubt he eats this way constantly unless he's on one of those crazy carnivore diets.

No, but I'm sure we'll soon smell them!!

You are absolutely not being unreasonable!

It’s all very well people having dietary requirements, but it’s not all very well for one person to expect to hog all the objectively “best” or most expensive aspect of the meal - which the meat is generally considered to be. (I don’t eat meat but this is how it’s generally considered - meat or a veggie alternative is considered the main element of the meal, the centrepiece).

There’s also a limit to how much meat there can be in total as the bigger the cut the more oven space it will take up.

As for asking you to fry some pork chops at the same time as cooking a roast, I’m lost for words. It would be better to shove in a few extra drumsticks for him if anything, but there’s no way that frying meat should be added to the complexities already inherent in doing a roast.

As an aside, I would not be having any truck with attempts to “help”. I have this sign across the entrance to my kitchen for these sort of occasions!

Plate up the meat & stuffing, and leave veggies to serve.
Give everyone the same portion and they csn choose the extras.

So what if he’s training for an event or is on a cut? He has the choice to decline the invitation or to go along and just eat a normal roast dinner. My BIL is a meat fiend and takes far more meat than he needs at Sunday dinners. He has NO veg but does have Yorkies and spuds. He doesn’t even go to the gym, he’s just greedy and unhealthy 😂 I think that if the guest wants a whole plate of meat and are likely to need quite a lot of it, then it would be polite of them to bring some extra meat for themselves. Catering for allergies or vegans is different. This is just a preference, whether it is related to training or not.