To be terrified about telling the boss I’m resigning

2.5 hours to do 30 miles oh my goodness

It's a no brainer OP. They have no issue with taking the piss and paying you not that much while expecting you to work late every day - so why would you care so much what they think? You've got a better, closer job, you should be celebrating!

Most bosses have no idea people are going to resign because it's generally not in your interest for your boss to know you want out. Nothing about this is a big deal and if your boss makes out it is then it's just them continuing to be odd. Tell them the commute isn't working for you and get out of there OP!

Exactly this. For less than £30k it is absolutely not worth making family life so difficult

You sound very conscientious and uncomplaining. You'd be a credit to any company. However, no one is irreplaceable and they will have forgotten about you a week after you leave so don't worry about resigning.
Good luck in your new job!

Definitely get your new contract signed and a start date fixed first.
Then just tell the truth - the commute and pay are not sustainable for you anymore. It's not personal.

Don’t resign until you’ve signed the contract.
i recently resigned after a few years, various reasons, I waited until a busy period had ended and then handed my notice in. A couple of colleagues knew but my manager was v surprised. No-one else has applied yet which I’m not surprised about!
Placrs won’t have qualms about getting rid and it should work the other way too. Good luck!!

These dark fears are just that, fear. Leave , cry if you wish or shake a bit, get nervous, whatever, but leave. OK

All her being a dick should do.is reassure you you've made the right decision.

Just take everything on the chin knowing you'll be out of there soon.

Underhand? What? You've just described the process everyone goes through when they get a new job.

There is no need to be terrified.

If they dismiss you instantly or are harsh to you during your notice then they are rude and unprofessional. You didn’t sign your contract in blood. People are allowed to leave their job. If they needed to get rid of you, they’d do it in a heartbeat.

You don't owe them anything. You do work for them, they pay you in return. That's it, that's the extent of the social contract. You don't owe them for choosing to give you a job, they did that because it served their interests, not yours.

Just go in tomorrow, explain you're resigning and why. Don't say you used them as a stop gap, because you didn't. You had no idea the job wouldn't be a good fit when you took it.

They're not going to fire you on the spot, they have to pay your notice period even if they decide to put you on gardening leave. Yeah, they might be dicks about it while you work your notice period, but who cares? You'll never have to see these people again soon, their opinions of you are unimportant, let any comments roll off you like water off a ducks back.

“Thank you for the opportunities you’ve provided me, it’s a great place to work. But my family need to see more of me and with the cost of living, I need a higher salary. I’ve found something closer to home so unfortunately here’s my resignation, I’ll be leaving on XX/XX/XXXX. Thank you again and I wish everybody the best for the future.”

It’s awkward but everyone has to resign at some stage. You owe your family more than your employer.

All employers know that there is a risk that employees may leave at some point, for a variety of reasons. Be kind to yourself and just hand your notice in. They have statutory duties to perform in relation to your leaving and can't dismiss you on the spot without paying you your wages and any accrued leave. Good luck in your new job!

This!

Why all this angst? This a completely normal situation and one in which you, not your employer, hold all the cards. You don't like your job so you're resigning. That's literally all it is. It happens every day! You're leaving a job, not dumping your kids on the steps of an orphanage.

If they dismissed you on the spot (which they actually won't/can't if you've resigned) they'd still have to pay you for your notice period, so you'd very likely have a month off on full pay.

If they are 'harsh with you' during the notice period... well, who cares, really? It's not like they're going to flog you in the town square. The worst they can do is be a bit arsey with you, which you can very easily ignore when it's only for a few weeks. And as you'll have already resigned, you can simply say no to things they ask you to do that are over and above your working hours or job description. Once you've resigned you've got nothing to lose.

Also when you say "harsh on your notice period"
Wtf are they actually going to do ... be mean" so what? Boo hoo...

You come in do contracted hours only and take full lunch. Do your work as slowly as you like. They need your good will more than you need theirs....

Look work is a financial transaction. They pay you, you do work. At any time either party can decide it isn't working and use the contractually / legally available mechanism to end the relationship. Trust me they would let you go in a heartbeat if it was financially better for them to do so. Your only responsibility is to give them the contracutal notice and to work that notice to the best of your ability.

If you have never been made redundant then maybe you havent seen this hard truth for what it is yet. You are a number on their spreadsheet. Be polite, resign, work your notice and don't worry about hurting anyone's feelings, this is not that sort of thing.

You're being very dramatic about this, people change jobs every day.
Obviously no one is going to fire you on the spot 😐

Sign your new contract first. Then email your notice to your boss.

Ive voted yabu in so far yabu to be giving it a second thought.

You just say the usual nonsense "i love it here - everything is sooo wonderful especially you!!!! but i was headhunted and the role to just TOO good to turn down <sad face>"
I've done this at every job ever...

If he wants to get a cob on let him...

Well, if you're dismissed on the spot they'll have to pay for your notice period whilst you relax at home. Win-win

Seriously, you just say thank you for the opportunity, it's been great working here but I've found a position that suits me better and I'll be leaving on day x, I'm going to start preparing for a handover but please let me know if there is anything in particular you require from me.

It's just a job, you're not bound to them for life, any manager knows that, even if they don't like it.

I don’t think you should feel guilty at all.

and I don’t think you need to say anything to resign other than : This is my notice to resign on X date. Thank you for the opportunity to work here.

I would also email the resignation and let them ask to speak to you in person if that is what they want to do.

Don't tell them until you e signed the new contract.

Yes you are massively over thinking this.It sounds like you identify too much with your job.It's just a job, you are allowed to leave, they do not own you.
You are allowed to change your mind, and go somewhere else if it doesn't suit you.Do not feel guilty, if you've performed well it's unlikely they will fire you.
Enjoy getting the new role and examin why you feel so beholden to your employer?

Dismissed on the spot would be brilliant! Hello 2 months gardening leave