To have been patronising to the Doctor?

You sound like your client care skills are lacking tbh (also a solicitor). It doesn't take much time at all to allow the client to feel heard before drilling into what you actually need to know. Clients don't always even know what's relevant, it's our job to guide them there.

While I agree that that would be the ideal way to start, doctors shouldn’t interrupt and hold up their hands to stop patients talking just because they haven’t immediately got to the point in the way an perfect patient might. OP knew what she needed so was able to interrupt and state it clearly. But how many other things get missed or dismissed because the patient doesn’t know the exact right thing to focus on, and this doctor just goes “well I’ll stop you right there, this is a non-issue”.

OP YANBU
and well done for speaking up. So frustrating...

Yes, I'm similar.
I'm on dialysis (not suitable for transplant, unfortunately) and that's the first thing I say at any medical appointment, after many time wasting appointments.
"I am a dialysis patient"

One GP said "yes, thankyou for informing me" in a sarky way.
I don't care, I'll still keep repeating it 😊

As an attorney, I would argue that I have an obligation to read the salient parts of the client's file if there is one. Professional conduct demands that the lawyer (or doctor) know the history of the client or patient to be able to discharge one's duty properly. The onus is not on the client to educate me. Furthermore, good lawyers are specifically trained to elicit the necessary information through the right qustions, and sift through copious amounts of information. Clients and patients are not obliged to know which information is important to me and which is not.

OP, I think it was right that you had to remind him to allow the patient to finish talking and be up to speed on the notes.

My ex was a GP and had the biggest god complex going. Some of the shit he used to come out with made me despair for his patients.

He once gave me a lecture for feeding our newborn formula during the night and told me I should be only giving him water for night feeds. 😳

Also told me that ovarian cysts do not cause pain.

I used to reply ‘which textbook did you learn that out of?’ which would wind him up more.

I spoke to a young locum GP at my practice when I had a UTI. I had already tried all the over the counter remedies. She gave me 3 days antibiotics - standard treatment. But not for a diabetic who needs 7 days. I spoke to her 3 times over the next 8 days...she would not prescribe but also obviously would not check with anyone. Finally managed to see my GP and was rushed straight to hospital with sepsis. I was very lucky, after 2 weeks in hospital I was OK.
Sometimes you have to make a fuss.

In an ideal world, sure. But when GP appointments can take several days to secure in parts of the UK, people like me would already be hospitalised. I need same-day antibiotics when a UTI hits so being able to pop into a pharmacy and get them is something I am very grateful exists. Nothing careless about using antibiotics on a raging UTI!

My mum has been in hospital for three months. It is astonishing how few clinicians have actually read her notes properly. It has been incredibly frustrating when people have given an update that is total bollocks. My sister has been much blunter that I have and has called them out on it a few times.

Often when you’re dealing with something chronic the patient will know a lot about a specific condition, how to manage flair ups, risks etc and you really do have to be pushy and advocate now.

I worked for years for a software company who supply hospitals with their main patient administration systems.

My role was to research and turn the companies focus based on that research into hospital failings, healthcare policy and everything around these.

I know more about policy than most people in hospitals do.

And I use it whenever its needed.

My daughter was in hospital for abdominal pain and separately she had pain in her legs from an issue she had had from birth.

A consultant came round with several student doctors. He talked over us both. He tried putting the leg pain and abdominal pain together in a diagnosis while talking to the student doctors and dismissed us trying to explain.

As he turned to walk away I stood and said hang on. Before you go. For the benefit of these student doctors I would like to point out your many failings during your examination of my daughter according to your own rules.

You failed to introduce yourself by name and title. You have failed to read the patients notes or any documentation as shown by your lack of awareness about a lifelong issue with her legs. You failed to used human language and by that make clear to non medical folk what you are talking about. You failed to ask the patient any questions beyond where does it hurt.
I pointed out that that departments last inspection by the CQC held them up on very similar failures in patient care requiring improvement. I can see that none of the improvements have been made despite your board papers alluding to new standards.

I then asked if he would like to start again now he has demonstrated to his students how to break most of the rules as set out in the NHS.

Very patronisingly I gave him the first line - repeat after me "hello my name is..."

He looked furious but did comply and went through everything by the book. Turned out my daughter had appendicitis and had her appendix out a few days later.

The nurses came round and said the consultant instructed them to give us anything we need and make sure all observations are carried out exactly to schedule. They said he was absolutly terified of us and thought I was a healthcare reporter or inspector.

Ive had to use my knowledge a few times and have helped friends and family reciece the treatment they deserve too.

So be patronising and pushy. Be a pain to them. Its your health they are dismissing.

I’m not quite sure when they would have time to read patient notes at my GP because the appointments are back to back. The same for hospital doctors as well. There are quite a lot of notes to plough through. My daughter’s would take several hours to read as she has a medical condition. I always lead with that info if it is for something relevant.

YANBU

You should 100% complain. Regardless of anything else he was incredibly rude to you. His parting words were probably because he could forsee a complaint and was attempting to make you think it was your fault.

Great advice about starting with "I have a kidney transplant", that might help you going forwards.

However, doctors help shouldn't be contingent on forming your sentences in the right order and you shouldn't have to in case a GP cuts you off. There are a myriad of people out there without the ability to advocate well for themselves with all sorts of conditions and for all sorts of reasons, and these are the people who your complaint might help.

My DH has a very complex medical history. So many hospital admissions, A&E trips, immunocompromised immune system and has a consultant. Sometimes the system seems backwards as he has to go through the GP system for help and often ends up with the wrong help because the doctor doesn't understand how complex my DH is. It then escalates and he ends up being admittex to hospital. Many times he and I have been cut off for "waffling" to then be apologised to as it was all relevant.

Personally I think that while it helps to start with something direct, sometimes it doesn't work like that, particularly when a patient has a complex history and lots of factors may be relevant. Doctors have a duty of care and a key part of the job is listening to give equal opportunity to all patients.

We could unpick what the OP said about what it would have been better to say, but that doesn't change anything for others who have a complex history or those who aren't very good at speaking to a doctor and who might need more than 5 words. These are the people who if the OP puts in a complaint she will be helping.

Fwiw I have had the same experience, I complained and they changed my GP.

GPs see a conveyor belt of people, so it’s easier if you start such a conversation with the wider picture hi, I had a kidney transplant 10 years ago and feel an infection coming g on because XYZ

That doctor needed that, but unfortunately I doubt he will change.

Definitely complain op. Hope a&e are good to you.

I’m building a whole list of GPs i refuse to see again at my local surgery. Including one who brushed off my DD’s problem that actually needed surgery, and another who tried to prescribe her medication that has been banned in the UK for several years.

I had an ovarian cyst once that ended up torsioning and having to be surgically removed along with a chunk of fallopian tube due to a GP not listening when I tried to explain that the pain was qualitatively different to period pain. They just kept saying that period pain can be very bad. I know. I'm not saying its worse, it was probably less painful than severe peroid pain until it did torsion, I was saying it was different and also in a different location.

You can in the UK for UTIs but they're broad spectrum and I suspect that someone in the OP's situation would need something stronger and targeted. Probably following a blood test. And - well they shouldn't. Antibiotics are powerful drugs, the careless use of which has led to the rise of antibiotic-resistant bacteria. No one should be able to pop into a pharmacy and get them.

Absolutely this.

I have an hour appointment with new patients, yet regularly spend 15 minutes trying to find all the relevant information that’s scattered like a jigsaw throughout our IT system. This means I’m running late already and often still don’t have a complete understanding of why the patient has even been referred in the first place!

Always start an appointment with a concise summary. Even when your notes are technically accurate, the severity if your condition and extent of impact on your live is usually not conveyed in those notes. It takes a proper conversation with the patient for any clinician to begin understanding their full needs, as everyone is so individual. Sadly, as time rarely permits this, many health professionals jump to early conclusions and assume the most common symptoms means the most common condition, rather than fullly exploring.

I absolutely LOVE your comments and tone to the GP. You were 100% spot on and thankfully it got you what you needed. It takes a sharp shock to really make the clinician pause and remember that despite being the expert in medicine - the PATIENT is the only one with expert knowledge of their own body and medical history. The arrogance particularly in male doctors is still horrific and so ingrained at all levels (that’s a whole other thread).

I hope you’re feeling much better now.

YANBU, well done for standing up for yourself. Some Drs are beyond patronising and have a poor attitude towards their patients. Thankfully I haven’t come across many, but they are out there and are allowed to continue to bully and belittle because people don’t stand up for themselves.

I usually find myself siding with GP/nurse/other health professional. But this sounds like an awful consultation OP. Definitely feed it back to the practice. For those saying she should have immediately told him about the transplant…. Maybe, but part of being a GP is prizing out vital information through a history. Sorry this was your experience.

Yes write a letter of complaint.

Make it difficult for him.

YANBU but I corrected a GP on something once, to do with my disability, and she spent the rest of the appointment scoring points off me. Mind you, the GP in question is generally unhelpful.

YANBU, he sounds like a wanker. I have a few complex (though less serious) medical issues and I find having a regular GP invaluable, I experience chronic UTIs and my GP will even call me on the weekend if a test results happens to come through positive, so I can get a script for antibiotics faster. It can take a while to find one who actually cares (and has availability).

Id write a letter of complaint to the practice and send a copy to the CQC.

I can't believe the people on this thread trying to blame you. He needs to take a course in active listening.