This isn’t about me but someone I know a difficult situation.
Man and woman are getting married, they’ve already been together for 10 years.
The woman wants to elope or just have a tiny wedding with two witnesses. Her pov is that she doesn’t want a big fuss, she feels that if they try to have a small wedding it will escalate and get out of hand. Overbearing relatives that will try to take over the arrangements, if you invite Sue then you have to invite Sue’s partner and children (that sort of thing). She also feels that they don’t have the money for a proper wedding.
The man agrees that he doesn’t want a fuss, but he is worried about upsetting his family and what they might think. He just feels that it wouldn’t be right to do it without involving his family.
Yabu - the man is in the right
Yanbu - the woman is in the right