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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To find my partners road rage disgusting?

63 replies

Brmbrm · 03/11/2025 15:50

Just need a realty check as to whether I overreact on this subject really.
My partner does alot of driving for work so i can understand his frustrations, I also drive and encounter many idiots on my travels, people cut you up, are on the phone, speeding etc I just do what I'm doing and my motto is that hopefully karma gets those who drive and put themselves and other people in danger.

However my partner constantly is swearing and making gestures to people whenever we are driving, depending on what they've done it can range from calling them a twat/dickhead to more personal insults like fat bitch and even the c word. This isn't appropriate when a 6 year old is in the car is it?

I've told him to stop or if he must to use age appropriate language, he just doesn't care. People cut me up too but I dont swear at them when my 6 year old is with me (or even when shes not) because its not like they hear it or it will change anything. AIBU?

OP posts:
Haroldwilson · 03/11/2025 16:16

That's not good. As a cyclist, that kind of driver is the sort who almost kills you then yells at you about it.

Is he emotionally dysregulated in other areas of life?

Ilovepastafortea · 03/11/2025 16:12

I must confess that I sometimes swear at inconsiderate drivers. But when driving my DGC around I will only say 'Oh my goodness what a silly blinking man!' But when driving with DH I will comment on what a anker that driver was swapping lanes at the last minute without signalling, or, as happened today, I pulled over to allow an blue light ambulance to pass me & some idiot overtook me!! I so called him an f'ing anker 😡

I have a friend who's DH buys wrecks of sports cars (mostly Lotus), does them up & sells them on. She's frequently driving a fancy-pants sports car in various states of repair & says that she has much more aggression from <invariably male> drivers when driving a Lotus Esprit (for example) than when she's driving her Discovery.

edited as, for some reason came out in bold

Overdonecabbage · 03/11/2025 16:02

Brmbrm · 03/11/2025 16:01

No unfortunately he is DD's father

Great, just great.

He’s a thoroughly unpleasant man outside of the car too, guaranteed.

Is this car behaviour new?

UnmaskedAmberFinch · 03/11/2025 16:01

Do better. You know he has a temper and anger issue but you’re in denial.

Good luck to that 6 year old of yours, you’ll be writing some even more concerning posts in years to come due to staying with this man.

Brmbrm · 03/11/2025 16:01

Overdonecabbage · 03/11/2025 15:54

I’m going to guess this person is not the father of your child?

Edited

No unfortunately he is DD's father

OP posts:
Caleb64 · 03/11/2025 15:58

Completely unacceptable, I’ve lost my temper before but when it’s frequent like this it’s disgusting. I genuinely thought most men were like this though but I’ll admit I must have gotten that wrong due to all the replies. My Dad was like it, long term ex was like it, FIL is like it and current partner is like it. I must have been very unlucky!

ConnieHeart · 03/11/2025 15:58

I've been on the receiving end of this sort of behaviour from other drivers, male and female, when I wasn't even in the wrong. It really shook me up. He obviously has no idea the effect it has on others and I'd worry about his anger in other areas of his life too

TomatoSandwiches · 03/11/2025 15:57

You can do better than this can't you.

At the very least stop getting in his car and drive yourself and your 6yr old about.

Kingoftheroad · 03/11/2025 15:55

Agree none of this is acceptable. People make mistakes when driving the last thing they need is more harassment and people making hand gestures at them.

l would also feel so stressed being in a car with someone with this level of anger goodness knows what your wee ones feeling

MathsMum3 · 03/11/2025 15:55

People who get as frustrated and angry as this when driving can also be a danger on the roads themselves. And the language in front of a 6-year-old is totally unacceptable. He should get some help - maybe anger management?

ThreePointOneFourOneFiveNine · 03/11/2025 15:55

He sounds awful. Why are you with him?

Overdonecabbage · 03/11/2025 15:55

It is truly shocking you have remained with him op.

Overdonecabbage · 03/11/2025 15:54

I’m going to guess this person is not the father of your child?