In laws telling DD she would never make it to university.

Vile. They wouldn’t be seeing my child again without dad being present. How could they possibly think that’s ok, these are the type of comments that stick. I had similar things said to me as a child and they still affect me.

Nothing like setting low expectations for kids from the outset… :( ffs ignore them.

What a nasty thing to say to your daughter and her own grand child. There would be blue smoke coming out of my head. I think your daughter has done very well and will have no problems getting into uni. Time to keep grandma at arms length now. What a horrible Grandma to have.

Oh I'm so sorry! She's 11, been through a lot already and showed so much determination. Maybe controversial but I don't take any notice of SATs 😂So much can change in the next five years. All the best to you and your daughter

Your daughter will exceed all expectations, she will go to 6th form/college and a uni of her choice,
Granny sounds jealous, i hope you and your daughter laugh behind her back, and for fun do research on her dream occupation, books and charities, .. she will be fine.

You know your child and their ability better than anyone else
believe in her and her dreams
keep going please

How dare she do this. She doesn't deserve to spend time with your daughter. Your daughter deserves encouragement.

So actually she's done really well there, even if you don't take into account her huge absence, she's very much achieved the standard in one area and pretty much achieved in the other two, imagine if she'd actually been able to be there. You don't have to get 4 A* at A level to go to uni, so long as she gets mid range gcses and reasonable A levels she'll be fine, it isn't as if she's said she wants to go to cambridge and become an astronaut fgs (not that you can even tell that it would be unachievable at 11 given her health issues too). I think it's a very sensible dream job for your daughter, our OT has made a huge difference to my son's life - she must already be a very caring little person to want to do that and I hope she absolutely flies into it and proves them wrong. They should be proud of her, not telling her she can't do it. In some ways it might help though, I overheard my teachers talking in year 6 and discussing how I wasn't that bright (or at least not as bright as another pupil). It added a touch of fire to me, and I ended up absolutely smashing my gcses and A levels and going to a Russell group uni. See if you can use it as a teaching point about self belief being the most important thing.

@Getbackinyourlane12 my dc did kumon maths and it's excellent for improving speed and accuracy. It also only needs about 15 minutes a day and it's not that expensive. It goes at the child's own pace.

I have 9 grandchildren aged 6 to 18. Eldest has just gone to Uni. Not his top choice as he needed A's but hes happy. We have a gd who messed up her GCSEs spectacularly so is now at college trying to get the grades she needs for further education. Of the others we have a child with quite severe autism but extremely bright. Id love to say he would get to Uni. We have another in PRU hoping to get some GCSEs. Another who his teachers think could do some GCSEs 2 years early. Children come in all sizes They suddenly surprise you.
Its quite nasty to classify her at so early age. Id be having words with MIL and do your best to boost your DD

Huge academics?? They're nuts. You encourage your daughter to be and aim for what she wants to be. Primary school and SATS are certainly no indicator of the future and your daughters attitude and application will count for everything.
I consider them to be extremely disrespectful of their grandaughter. Just carry on focusing on the positive as you obviously are.

Wow. Completely inappropriate. You'd think, if the GPs are academic, that they'd be encouraging her whatever her ability. Defo agree, no more unsupervised visits with the GPs! And they also need a jolly good talking to.

Dreadful and Im so sorry you both had to endure this! Remind Dgm that it is not her business to quash people’s dreams and ambitions. Also practically, you actually don’t always need a levels, there are t level and Btec routes too (or even access to health if she decides to retrain as an adult!) I’d think her challenging childhood health issues would actually help her in this field too - she’s obviously met many healthcare professionals and may have a greater understanding of things that some of her peers. Im so glad she’s recovered well and wish her every success xx

So firstly cut the toxic in laws off!! They sound vile.

Secondly I failed maths and English highers (Scotland) and still went to university at 17, qualified by 20 and now I am very well established in my career. Academia is not the be all and end all….your daughter did amazing with her 20% attendance and battling her own health issues!!

Tell in laws to go f**k themselves 🙊🤣

A friend of mine, in her early 40s graduated earlier this year to become an OT after starting out 4 years ago doing an Access course. She has done remarkably well, although did find it hard at times being a single mum, but she HAS done it.
Anything is bloody possible and for your MIL to be writing her off and not encouraging her is disgusting!!

As an occupational therapist I think it’s amazing your daughter wants to study to become one. I found the profession as a patient on a rehab journey. I was 39 though 😅 I’m not amazingly academic but I managed to pass the academic side. It’s your communication and people skills as well as an ability to relate to people and often think outside the box that makes a great OT. Once she finishes uni she will never have write academically ever again!
Honestly, I scraped through my degree but I am a damn good OT and no one has ever asked for my degree classification. It just matters that I have one and am HCPC registered.
GPs sound absolutely bloody vile. Please tell your daughter from an OT to an aspiring one - Go become whatever you want. You can achieve anything. And you will be brilliant at it 🥰

That's impressive to get those scores with that attendance, all whilst battling significant health battles. Sounds to me, like your DD will go far

There are alternative routes into non medical healthcare professions, doesn't need to go to university. If anything I think the university route is less preferable to the apprentice route. I trained to be a physio straight out if school, and was in no way prepared or ready to support people who were dying, who were life limited, who had their life turned upside down by a stroke or an accident. I'm really good at my job now, but I look back at my early days and am horrified with some of the things I did and said. Life experience is extremely valuable, and I don't think anyone should be admitted onto these courses without a couple years of relevant experience working, such as a physio assistant, a healthcare assistant.

The best therapists I know lead with their heart, not their academics. Commen sense, empathy, commuinication skills, problem solving are all far more important than getting top grades.

totally agree with the above OP.

I'm so mad on your behalf. Snobby ignorant know it alls, discouraging a vulnerable child. They are appauling.

Also experienced Year 2 teachers saying I'd just have to accept that a DC "just wasn't academic". Luckily they didn't hear that. Over came dyslexia and got a 1st and works for Blue chip companies. I'm really proud of them.

You sound like a very switched on and supportive mum whose got her DC through so many hurdles and she is already catching up, she will flourish. Im sure you will help her get over this latest hurdle ( but I don't think seeing the GM is a positive thing) Very best of luck to your lovely DD.

Please reassure your daughter. My youngest had to have interventions for her SATS. She got similar marks to your daughters. Despite averaging maybe 40% attendance due to ill health in years 7-9 she is now predicted 7's across the board at GCSE.

I'd be absolutely outraged too.

DC2 got mediocre SATS results and is now in year 3 at uni studying a STEM subject and is expected to get a 1st.

Does your MIL have a tendency to speak her mind without thinking first? My DM, who I now believe has ADHD and autism (I do) tends to blurt out whatever is in her head and usually it is something nice but not always. At these times, I have to remember that she is generally a very kind and decent person but it is hard.

Correct - they test a very narrow range of attainment.

My youngest niece failed her English SAT because she had a meltdown in one paper. She subsequently got excellent GCSE and A levels and is at a RG university (though currently on a salaried year in industry working for a major company).

SATS aren’t worth the paper they are written on and have very little bearing on future success. I was undiagnosed dyslexic and adhd as a child did terribly in my sats and have two MA degrees now (from a good university.

Am I the exception? No, the logical answer is a maths test you take when your 11 doesn’t impact the trajectory of your life. They are silly people OP.

Get her a tutor to catch up what she’s missed out on and see where she is in a few years! Don’t mention anything educational to her grandma either. Honestly her grandma seems toxic keep her away. your little girl should be happy and achievements celebrated not this competitive favourites rubbish.