My disrespectful teenagers

Oh grow up lol

OP what have you been doing as they've grown up to build your relationship with them in a way that isn't just you doing stuff for them (being their support human as a PP put it)?

I don't think you can expect your DC to spend time with you if you haven't developed that aspect of your relationship. My teens are nothing like yours (which isn't to say they can't be self-absorbed and have never spend most of the weekend in their rooms!). However, we've been spending time with them, connecting and having fun, getting them to help out with keeping the household running, finding out about them, and telling them about us, since they were born. Obviously it's changed as they've got older, we drop some things and find others. But we've constantly been building connections, 1:1 as well as as a family.

If you haven't been doing this I think it's hardly surprising they aren't that interested in spending time with you. They don't have any reason to want to. It will probably take some time to connect and be more difficult to find an in now they are old enough to be looking outwards and preparing to make their own way in the world. But is there anything at all you have some sort of mutual interest in that you could start to connect over? Even watching a TV show you all like together could be a start (won't be enough on it's own, though). Do they enjoy anything with you on holiday?

No one else but the OP has told people to F off have they though?

Maybe you need to go back an re read the thread to get a bit more clarity

They sound like typical 13 and 15 year old girls to me. I think you’re being very over dramatic, OP, and don’t have realistic expectations of teenagers.

OP isn't being remotely dramatic and attention seeking at all 😉😉

Such a reasonable person
So calm and not at all completely over the top
Can't at all see why your DD might avoid you

@ragandbonewoman
Is there a limit then on how many times someone can reply/quote ?

I thought the idea of Mumsnet was to comment on subjects by Posters?

The OP is quite vocal and aggressive in her replies so others can't respond to them...how does that work then? 🤔

🤣🤣🤣

@Haaaruuuumph is also weirdly obsessed with you OP. I would feel more sorry for her DD as at least her husband had a choice.

I totally disagree, I would react the same way to posts that make so many assumptions and gleefully pull these together to create a completely false narrative around the OP being dramatic, hysterical and attention seeking.

Nasty bitter women jumping on this thread today

Hope she hasn't got a husband, I feel sorry for the poor sod living with someone so volatile

Do you feel better now? 🤣

Wowwww this unfolded quickly 🍿

Still intrigued about defending them at school though.,,, what? Why? How? A parent shouldn’t be ‘defending’ teenagers ‘against’ teachers - you should be showing them consistency in rules being applied by adults in charge of their care….

*You're

Anyway OP had a completely normal and not at all OTT reaction to this thread and I can't possibly see why her DD might be distancing themselves from her...

Yes

They'll learn their mother only wants them around to boost her own ego and for her own emotional needs

And then they'll go even more to the grandparents who already spoil them and get all the treats (and emotional support they need themselves) there...

You sound like a lovely caring mum. You have every right to expect basic manners. Your teens sound like mine who is 14 and quite frankly a rude, inconsiderate antisocial PITA. I am SO bored of of modelling good behaviour but do it on autopilot. If I get upset occasionally it's good for her to realise the universe doesn't revolve around her and her phone.

Her sister and brother were exactly the same, the eldest became human again at 17, ds is taking a bit longer but can be warm and friendly occasionally.

Be nice to yourself.

Most other posters on this thread sound weird.

You sound like a lovely caring mum. You have every right to expect basic manners. Your teens sound like mine who is 14 and quite frankly a rude, inconsiderate antisocial PITA. I am SO bored of of modelling good behaviour but do it on autopilot. If I get upset occasionally it's good for her to realise the universe doesn't revolve around her and her phone.

Her sister and brother were exactly the same, the eldest became human again at 17, ds is taking a bit longer but can be warm and friendly occasionally.

Be nice to yourself.

Most other posters on this thread sound weird.

Your overreaction like this to suggestions that you overreacting and being overemotional at home is stressing them out and making them uncomfortable just proves the point. Your crying might be making them shut down. Don't parentify your kids. They are not there to be your emotional support or fill your social needs, those aren't reasonable expectations of teens. Chill.

This

You've had some good advice here. No need to be snippy