Should guising/trick or treating have an upper age limit..?

I'm biased with my answer. My eldest (16) and three of his friends all got dressed up and took my youngest (11) out trick or treating. My autoimmune condition means that I was really struggling and couldn't have taken him myself. My biggest fear was that people would be mean about the teenagers being dressed up. They all love trick or treating, are doing absolutely no harm and even got given a big box of sweets for being so polite whilst out.

I was really grateful for the people in my area being so lovely to them. It meant that my youngest got to have a great time with other (older) kids all dressed up too.

I don’t agree. I went out with a group of 12-14 years who were well behaved and if there were younger kids around let them go first. I didn’t see the problem. Round here it’s usually like that. The kids decide for themselves when they are too old.

My ds 13 went to his friend's house and they did pumpkin carving and the friend's mum made them a little halloween buffet.
Then they went out trick or treating.

My dd14 spent weeks planning and coordinating her outfit with her friends and they all made a big effort.

I had some teenagers come to my house who's costumes were amazing and funny. They were polite and well mannered.
They made me smile and I was very happy to give them sweets.

It's such a shame that some teens give others a bad name, but I don't think that means the good ones should miss out.

@SprayWhiteDung my daughter and her friends walk themselves to school and ballet and whatever all day but a parent follows along for trick or treating. Mostly because of the slight risk of running into the other sorts of teenagers using it as an excuse for chaos. There’s definitely an in between age for some children - not all.

I would hope not the very young children, but there comes an age when it's 'seriously not cool' to have your parents with you, but when you're still young and vulnerable yourself.

In general, once a child is old enough to walk to and from school on their own/with friends, they would likely kick back on the idea of their parents accompanying/supervising them when out trick or treating.

Even if the parents tell them to only go to houses of people they know well, if they see lots of 'untapped potential' for getting even more sweets on their travels, many will try their luck anyway.

I'm not saying that it's likely to be dangerous in these circumstances; just that it's far from impossible, and thus a very unnecessary risk.

I don't care how old people are so long as they are polite and respectful

My teens 12 and 14 would live to go track or treating. Full dress up and would spend ages on outfits. Sadly people reaxt to them like they are doing something wrong. They are polite, well mannered.

I have no issue with older teens trick or treating if they are wearing costumes and knocking before 9.30pm

My adult dsd likes trick or treating , she has high level sen. Everyone was lovely to her

If a couple teenagers came to my door dressed up and respectfully took a few sweets, said thank you and went on their way… why would I have an issue? I’m not about to say “sorry you’re too old to join the fun.” What’s the Halloween version of a Scrooge?

Surely if they’re misbehaving that’s one thing, but kids enjoying the spirit of it and dressed up? Crack on.

My kids both naturally on their own decided they were done around 13. Wouldn’t judge any kid who still enjoyed it older though.

You give sweets to anyone under 18 who made the effort to dress up and is being polite. I’d rather they were engaged in community events and making connections, than being disaffected in the shadows.

I’m happy to give anyone who knocks sweets as long as they aren’t rude or aggressive. There is so little joy in life I say enjoy every moment that can bring a smile
to someone’s face.

Give the old ones apples. They never come back.

This really. Behaviour is the issue , not the age. While out I have seen such bad behaviour from younger kids (of acceptable age) too, some on their own ,some with parents.

You are being a bit ridiculous.
I don't think there's an issue with the age of those out guising, but there is with the rudeness. For what it's worth that's not limited to teens, there's plenty of doorbell footage around here of younger kids pretty much emptying bowls of sweets I to their bags. It's why I stopped letting kids choose what they wanted from the sweets we had, and handed them out instead. There are always a few grabby kids, sometimes encouraged by their parents to just 'take a few' (cue both hands in the tub).

As an aside, I don't really understand why you're OK with people coming into your area from other areas, but want a blanket ban on local teens. I've always thought that's rude.

Nah. We had some sweet young teens, they're 13/14. Very polite and friendly. Excellent costumes they'd done themselves etc

The issue isn't age, it's the attitude of taking all the sweets, chucking them around, shouting and swearing etc

My 11 year old went with her friends. I went to make sure they were safe.

I was paranoid about what people thought of her - she’s 5’8, adult sized and wore my chunky boots so was probably nearer 5’10.

She is young in her ways but looks so much older.

I can't comprehend, am struggling to understand a lot of the anxiety on this thread. I don't see an issue with 13/14 year olds going trick-or-treating like anyone else.

Because if you excluded all the things that are potentially dangerous, it would make for a very small, insular life. I bet you take your kids in the car , and that’s more likely to have a catastrophic ending .

I have a couple of sexual assaults under my belt (some as a child) , if I avoided all those situations for DD she’d never leave the house , or go to school or interact with anyone but me.

You can tell which people on here actually have teens and which only know the Facebook Group version of a teen.

I have a genuinely lovely teen with genuinely lovely friends who were singing a song at peoples doors, having chats and sending me photos of peoples amazing decorations. There will be kids in their year at school who were probably out drinking and causing a nuisance but they really aren’t all the same. I also didn’t realise till I had them myself in fairness.

My favourite trick or treaters are teenagers who are bit ‘too old’. Dressed up and loving it, but also trying to be cool. Been a teenager is bloody hard, they still enjoy childish things but feel pressure to be grown up.

I love that they are choosing a childish thing for an evening. They could be doing much worse things!

Why would a young child be in the presence of strangers with no supervision?

Never heard the word 'guising' before but I like it! (Just looked it up too.)

I think it’s all about intent.

A group of well meaning 13/14 year olds that have made the effort and dressed up, genuinely going out for a fun night and some sweets - no problem in my eyes. My child fell into this category and I was happy with them going out this year but have told them it’s the last.

A group of similar aged kids who would usually just be roaming the streets anyway stocking on a mask and generally being twats … not so much.

It's not about kids 'not being daft', though. However smart they are, a young child is no match for an adult abuser who is intent on harming them.

You may as well say that only 'daft' women could ever be at risk of being raped.

Just because a lot of abuse does take place in their own home and/or perpetrated by people who are known to them, that doesn't magically mean that strangers can't also pose a risk to them too.

Surely no loving, non-abusive parent would reckon that, because they don't pose a risk to their child - even though statistically they might be the most likely - it's therefore completely safe to expose them to strangers by actually knocking on their doors in the dark?

Probably not; but even one is far too many.

Why would you knowingly put all of the ideal circumstances in place for an abuser and then just hope that no bad person might ever exploit that opportunity?