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AIBU?

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Original poster

Step-daughter versus daughter Mumsnet Bingo

334 replies

GeorgeClarkefan · 01/11/2025 13:59

Hey I have a full house on Mumsnet Bingo, do I win a prize to cheer me up?

  1. Eldest daughter 9 abandoned by Dad, doesn’t see his family either.
  2. Youngest daughter 5 with my husband.
  3. Mother-in-Law wants to take grandchildren to Disney Land so my youngest, my stepdaughter and cousins, not my eldest.
And no we can’t pay for her ourselves in case you ask.
OP posts:
TheatricalLife · 01/11/2025 14:42

I wouldn't say a cliché, but it's come up a few times that I've seen.
You won't change her mind, and even if you did, I'd worry about unequal treatment while away, so you've only got two options really. You let youngest go or you don't.
I assume from your post that you couldn't afford a holiday there yourself with both girls (no shame in that at all).

Dacatspjs · 01/11/2025 14:42

Just tell her no, she isn't allowed to take your kids away without you, and you can't use annual leave to go on a holiday that doesn't include your whole family.

FlippityFloppityFlump · 01/11/2025 14:40

Does MIL have other step grandchildren (cousin's step siblings) or is your eldest the only one?

BettysRoasties · 01/11/2025 14:40

She wants a holiday with her grandchildren. You either accept or don’t for your shared. But you cannot force her to take your child.

You cannot force others to take on your child just because her family is shit and your husband accepted her. They didn’t agree.

If she did take your if you paid for her would that actually make anything better? Knowing she’s an unwanted add on.

If you don’t let the youngest go expect her to be aware of the fact she was invited with her sibling, cousins and granny and you said no.

DoubleShotEspressox · 01/11/2025 14:36

Your mother in law is a cunt.

Original poster
GeorgeClarkefan · 01/11/2025 14:35

I don’t know what I will say to my eldest.

Another cliché husband actually, physically had his head in his hands before he went to work on a Saturday that he didn’t have to.

OP posts:
SlightlyBruisedApple · 01/11/2025 14:05

GeorgeClarkefan · 01/11/2025 14:03

No idea what my question is. I have even removed the poll.

I am a complete cliché aren’t I?

I get that you’re upset that your elder daughter has no contact with her father and his family. That’s hard for you both. I think you should try to hold that separate to your younger daughter’s relationship with her father/your husband’s wider family, though.

Original poster
GeorgeClarkefan · 01/11/2025 14:03

No idea what my question is. I have even removed the poll.

I am a complete cliché aren’t I?

OP posts:
ACatNamedRobin · 01/11/2025 14:00

What's your question OP?