AIBU to think this is a bit rude/ cheeky?

Personally I’d ask, it’s polite,but it seems that a lot of people just expect. I actually find it hard to believe that most people don’t take their own toiletries.

Sure, but if you don't provide an alternative for guests I still don't think it's unreasonable for someone to use whatever shampoo they find.

No but they are personal and not for anyone to use. I don’t spend £20 odd a bottle for other people to use it, even DH!

I think if you use a particular brand, whether it’s toothpaste, shampoo, sanitary products, it’s not unreasonable to provide a different/cheaper brand for guests

One doesn’t open drawers, doors, cupboards or anything else closed, in others’ homes. Even if the doors are glass.

That is just rock-bottom basic decent manners.

I mean I think most people don’t actually have a guest bedroom really do they? It’s just a room in your own house that you let people use. It’s not Downton Abbey!

What a cheeky woman! Of course they weren't there for her use. If you had a wardrobe of clothes in there would she have thought she could help herself?

That wasn’t the point I was making.

They were talking about would I expect visitors to bring their own soap and not use the hand wash in the bathroom. Which is not the same thing as bringing personal toiletries. Handwash is there for everyone to use when they visit the toilet, for hygiene reasons.

My point about using someone’s toothbrush was in response to them thinking EVERYTHING in someone’s bathroom/home was fair game.

I disagree. Everyone has different hair types - coloured, anti dandruff, curly etc and my dh and son use different shampoo to me. I wouldn’t dream of using someone else’s toothpaste either. Hand wash is a lot more ubiquitous.

The perfume smells sound lovely and I'm intrigued what they are now

She obviously approves of your perfume choices, I would take it as a compliment! Besides which, you get to smell your favourites on her. I do put things in the guest room for their use and assume that they will make use of them.

I think this was an honest mistake on her part if they were in the room she was staying in. Not like she sneaked in on her way to the bathroom.

OK, personal as in a specific brand is a personal choice. But they aren't intimate. Unlike a toothbrush which was the ridiculous comparison made. Using someone else's shampoo or toothpaste or even perfume is no way comparable to using someone else's toothbrush

Surely that depends. If you're someone like DH who uses any shampoo and toothpaste then they're not personal but if you have specific ones then yes they are. I have keratin treatment on my hair so can only use sulphate free shampoo and I can't use most toothpastes as they give me mouth ulcers and sores. I know which brands suit me so yes, they are personal hence not sharing with guests or using what the post provides if I was a guest.

First post nails it & despite the Op’s later posts, I still agree with this. Don’t leave toiletries that aren’t personal / intimate in a guest bedroom if you don't want guests to use them.

Shampoo and toothpaste are no more personal than hand-wash. A toothbrush is entirely different.

The perfume is a bit more personal than hand-wash but not enough to be an issue that it was used.

That isn’t the same and you know it 🙄

We’re talking about personal toiletries. Not hand-wash in bathrooms that people would expect visitors to use, to ensure their hands are clean after going to the loo.

Do you use people’s toothbrushes when you visit their house? Or do you take your own?

Clearly you have friends with multiple bathrooms if you’re being told ‘which bathroom to use’. How many bathrooms do you think most people have?

But that’s different. Because you’ve been TOLD to help yourself.

That permission has already been granted.

To be fair it’s never going to happen as I only live in a one bed flat so nowhere for any guests to sleep! But in this hypothetical situation I would off them basic shampoo and shower gel, I don’t see anything wrong with keeping expensive stuff for myself.

Personally I’d rather stay in a hotel but if I was staying with someone I would rather take my own things anyway.

I leave toothbrushes and handmade guest soaps in the guest room. If perfume/ cologne was on display it would be assumed it was for usage

I have about 20, all expensive. Some people have toy collections, trainer collections etc. Adults can spend their own money however they please.

I think this is so rude! It’s your home, you should be able to keep
your perfumes wherever you want, without thinking it’s an offer to use them! Especially expensive ones!
the cheek of you hosting this couple and she’s using your perfumes all week without asking, and then the parting comment is “thought I’d get my moneys worth” 😳 Didn’t you do
enough be having them? Joke or
not, that comment would piss me off.
Did they leave you a gift? Buy dinner or anything else while they stayed? I’m sorry, but her card would be marked after that 😂👍❌

Lesson learned I would say, here. Did she open sealed boxes? Then yes, you should be upset. Perfume goes off eventually how ever expensive.

Since it was a fairly new friend I would be thinking a few house rules would have been put out there on their arrival?
”This is your room, I’ve left out these towels, toiletries for you to use. Do you see my Personal collection of perfume? Sorry they are in your room for the lack of space.”
The conversation may then prompt the guest to say something.

Our guest room doubles as my sewing/ yarn room. I cover the cabinet with a throw as a deterrent to go nosing through my projects and let the guest know what they can use in the room.

Maybe 🤔 but whats the point of keeping it for special occasions

I swear most people skim read posts and then just add whatever they want to! It’s so fucking annoying

I'd say displaying them in the guest room is a bit OTT - maybe put them oit of sight if you dont want them used as it seems they were laid out in such a way