To not allow 14 y/o go camping with friends no adults

If they're going to the Lake District, do they know there's rules regarding where they can camp? It's not allowed near lakes etc. I live a little closer to it than you seem to so sorry if I'm stating the obvious. As far as I know though, the ones who do risk it (I think a couple of people have been asked to move along if not above the highest wall etc) they usually leave by daybreak.

It's hard. Especially with boys. Then with boys who are established in what they get up to. I've always tried to be aware of who is going, how many are going, are they confident in themselves to know how to safely put a fire out (though that's not allowed, some will always ignore the rules) are they strong and will protect eachother if anything happens? Do you trust the kids to stay as a group and look out for eachother? All the lads in both groups have always been tall and strong, I didn't feel like they would be an easy target for anyone messing about.

I've been lucky with my son's. I know and have seen how protective and mature they are towards eachother. They've all grew up together. It didn't sit right but sometimes I wanted them to have the experience, I don't want them to be held back like I was. Lying to my mum as she would 100% not allow something. My son's always tells me where, who, what time they expect to be back and more importantly, if I text them, they have to reply. Maybe his first time should be closer to home though. For your nerves to settle and for him being closer should anything spook him/he didn't realise how freezing cold it gets, etc.

I would say min 16, but when my son & pal wanted to do this at age 16.5 (they wanted to do a long hike just the two of them & rough camp half way) the other parents refused. I thought that was babying both lads, frankly, but it’s a very cery common view ime. At age 14? No.

No way. A couple of years ago 4 boys teenagers went camping and they all died.
One of the boys mothers didnt even know he was camping, he'd lied to her.

100% absolutely no WAY.

I would allow it.

We wrap teenagers in cotton wool and don’t allow them to take risks and responsibility. Then we’re surprised when, at 18, they can’t get a job or fend for themselves. They only become sensible adults if you start to treat them as adults around this age.

Both my boys were camping locally with friends at 14. I gave them a lecture about staying together, being sensible with campfires etc, and what to do in the event of an emergency. The chances of a group of 14 yo boys being attacked by a maniac in the middle of the night is so slim as to be ridiculous!

Swallows and Amazons were fine.
I wish I had been invited at that age, but I only went with Scouts. Luckily I was allowed to go out all day to wherever I wanted.
Let him go it will be good for him.

And think of all the weirdos and criminals they stumbled across in that time...

My DD was always off camping, has been since about 13, she's an adult now. But I don't see what the issue is, there's a group of them, what on earth do you think is going to happen? Solo camping, no. But in a group? At what point are you going to let go?

I did this at 14 with a group of friends, all girls, in the woods. A couple of us had been camping for years with parents so we knew how to put up tent, use the stove etc. we only did 1 night though, if that makes a difference? By 16 we were doing longer but staying at campsites as we wanted showers by then. We always had a mobile phone or 2 in the group and were a sensible group of friends.

I mean, the famous five were literally rowing out to and camping on islands at that age if not younger... 😜

You clearly are an overprotective parent, if all his mate's parents are fine with it and you're the only one preventing their child from joining in the fun.

The more you prevent him from doing (reasonable) things his peers are allowed to do, the sooner he'll simply stop telling you the truth about what he's doing.

Camping isn't going to become magically safer in two years time, nor is his judgement going to get significantly better. The closer they all get to 18 the more likely that booze etc will be a part of these trips.

Mine did from about that age. They were Scouts or army cadets and all sensible about the country code etc. They had to have tracker on and a plan for if help was needed. It’s a great experience and I would much rather that than going into the city.

Why would they want to camp in someone's garden when they've been out camping properly (the whole point of camping) for years?

I used to do this as a child - I think from about age 12 with a group of friends, all girls. However, we would camp on the land of one of the group's parents so there was always a door to knock on (and no doubt a watchful eye over us) if needed.

Out in the wild I would say 14 is too young for this. Might be a bit safer on a campsite but I can't imagine any campsite would take a party of unsupervised 14 year olds.

Lake District Camping info

Seems like a regular thing people do.

Can you talk to some other parents about it?

My first motherly thought was “no way” but maybe it’s exactly the sort of thing young boys should be doing?

It might help to think about things from different angles:

eg.

If not now, then when? If not this, then what? If not with them, then with who?

It can help calibrate your thinking. So if this one, you’re thinking he's too young now. In four years time he’ll be 18 and can do it anyway. What does he need to learn life skills wise to hit the point where it would be ok. What stepping stone activities might be suitable? What check in arrangements might help?

(And tough as it is, on the going missing front, a group of teenage boys is about as low risk as it gets unless their plan is to play extreme hide and seek. A significant proportion of people who go missing in woodlands do so deliberately of their own accord rather than it being a third party).

No way, I think 14 would be considered too young to stay overnight in the house without an adult, let alone in a tent in a forest.

Actually tbh my son went camping not very long ago and he's the same age. I wasn't super comfortable with it but they're all pretty sensible and Actually it's a pretty nice, wholesome activity. I can be quite over protective about a lot of things but I also thought I need to be careful not to deprive him of valuable experiences. Also if his friends have gone a few times it sounds like they know what they're doing.

Absolutely no way imo

You are the parent to your child and have said no, that is all you need to worry about. I have let my 14 year old go camping with no adults and let my DS1 and DS2 do the same when they were that age. You make the decisions for your child and let others do the same.

I think 16 minimum for this if no adults anywhere near. You say they have been doing this for years? So from 10/11 years old. This sounds a bit like a tale for telling to me - like my 10yo daughter telling me all her friends have mobile phones and all allowed to go out on own to park etc.