Would you/have you spent hundreds on a prom dress?

Agree. Surely we can take an "each to their own" approach on this. You don't have to spend a lot on your children's proms but it says more about you than other people if you go around judging and thinking you are better than them.

My children are phenomenally tenacious and have battled through a lot and are all round amazing kids. If when the time comes I want to give them a decent budget for the prom thats between me and them.

They won't be judging how your child celebrates and nor will I. Each to their own

Because they are ruining the environment. . . with tat . . .

I spent £600 just on the dress but my daughter had been through a major operation and was almost paralysed. It was the one thing that kept her going. She had to sit and watch most of the prom but it was a celebration that we weren't sure she would ever make. Hopefully my other two will wear the dress but I won't be spending this much again.

Gosh I’ll happily buy a dress but £300+ wasn’t what I was thinking.
Maybe we’ll hire one or get a high street dress. Although saying that, there’s a local shop that only sells prom style dresses and she always looks in the window…. I’d best get saving.

I spent 280 on my daughter's and it was worth every penny.

It's a 1 off event.

She looked knockout.

Presumably nobody gets married thinking it will only last a year though.

This is BS. It's the equivalent of spending 40K on a wedding when the marriage only last a year.

More bloody fool them. If you're struggling financially, one of the last things you should be spending money on is a dress to be worn for 3 or 4 hours only. What sort of lesson does that teach a child?

It's MN.

It's nearly the law you MUST hate any kind of fun and celebration, birthdays, weddings, hen parties, baby showers all the way to holidays, days out.

and your life must be as miserable and devoid of fun as possible. 😂

or it's a way for bitter posters stuck at home with nowhere to go and no invitation to make themselves feel better

I left school early 90s, I must have just had a more sensible school then 😁
They certainly weren't the norm back then anyway, not in my experience.
No social media trying to outdo each other either.

Nope. Not a chance. Both DDs got their prom dresses from Vinted. They looked fabulous and spent less than £50.

In my experience, it was the girls from lower income families who bought the expensive dresses, had professional hair styling and make up etc.

But if that poster can afford it and is happy to spend that amount of money why are they a mug ?

It’s American consumerist nonsense. See also baby showers and gender 🤢🤮 reveal parties.

and an environmental nightmare. Hanger for the dress? Sailboard?? WTAF??! 🤣🤣🤣 You mug!

Getting into debt or financial difficulties due to peer pressure for one night is ridiculous
So is criticising peoples choices on how to spend money they can easily afford on whatever they want

But we're not talking about you, we are talking about impressionable teenagers being raised in an environment that values looks over other more relevant values and the prom system promulgating it.

Oh yes

Of course us women are to blame

I was 100% to blame for taking her in when she had nowhere else to go,for teaching her basic skills (like how to fill a kettle and turn it on,how to wash up and how to budget) and trying my best to support her in other basic life skills (she was 18)

I'm in the wrong for refusing to hand over my salary every month,refusing to buy her expensive foods (that she'd waste) expensive clothes (which she ruined) run around after her 24/7 and plan my whole life around her (and at some point,not getting a second job so she had more to spend)

I'm also in the wrong for not being her personal servant,tending to her every whim and she ruined so many days out by throwing tantrums for the hell of it

She also tried to tell me with a straight face that my own ds 'wasn't allowed to come and stay at MY house' and when he showed up,she punched his dog

One woman told me that I (as in me personally) was the reason HER kids would never have a step mother and another called me all the names under the sun

She can go live with them and let's see how long they'd take her screaming in their faces,the stealing,the waste,the rudeness,the smirking when she thought she was getting her own way,the backstabbing and causing their marriages to fall apart like my relationship almost did

But nope,all my fault as a stepmother

There's a hire shop near here that a huge amount of teens go to. The woman there often hires the same dress out twice in a week, but they are cleaned and suitably altered to fit each teen.

I have no idea how she keeps track! It was £80 to hire and included cleaning and alterations. Absolute bargain - and I didn't have to store it or sell it afterwards.

...it's right there in the OP?!

"Some have spent hundreds (£350-£500) and their parents have actually taken out payment plans or loans to get them...."

All the girls I know in the last few years (neighbours’ daughters, DH’s nieces) going to proms/school leavers’ dances are buying dresses from Vinted, eBay or charity shops, and dialling the whole grooming thing down considerably.

I mean I would spend that amount but that’s because I could afford to, if I couldn’t then I wouldn’t! I certainly wouldn’t take out a loan etc! That’s the silly part

I still have my leavers ball dresses. I definitely wore them again at university balls. My step daughter wore one to a party recently.

A decent quality dress lasts decades.

And I still have the memories of those leavers balls. They've lasted way longer than any car.

Life is a balance between investing and living. You can't take it with you when you die.

My children's school clamped down on this. Stating that as they were a state funded secondary school the proms were being scaled back to an award ceremony followed by music, drinks and buffet in the school hall, no limousines would be permitted onto the school premises. They were clear that the occasion had to be properly accessible to all pupils and excessive spending creates social stigmas and barriers ro those who cannot afford to do so, and it would be unlawful as a state funded school to be actively supporting such an event.

Good for them I say.