Would you/have you spent hundreds on a prom dress?

I spent an unreasonable amount of money on a prom dress. However, it was a one-off , DD has neither asked for, neither expected anything on that level again.
Her leavers dinner dress (6th form) was pretty cheap and she bought it herself, wore the same shoes that she had for prom. The lesson for her (if there has to be a message) was that on that occassion we were able to treat her to what she wanted. Shes grown up not having that, if it had been at a different point in time she'd have known we couldn't afford it and wed have done the best we possibly could on a much lower budget 🤷‍♀️

Let’s not pretend that by spending an obscene amount of money on an outfit that’s worn for 4 hours we’re trying to instill a valuable life lesson for our daughters. I think if we thought more about the common good we would pare the whole thing down so all could participate. No one would suffer and there would be a lot less waste. But as I say, it’s easier said than done when you get sucked into the hype. It would take a collective reimagining of the “prom experience “

I got one from a charity shop for £15

It wasn’t a ski trip it was a hockey/netball trip that all of the hockey/netball team were expected to attend. It’s fine - and a valuable lesson - to understand at 16 that sometimes people can’t afford things that other people can afford.
Everyone can go to the prom, but everyone can’t afford £££ dresses, and that’s life.

Not equivalent. A small percentage of kids go on the ski trip. It’s known to be a luxury. We have turned prom into a rite of passage that everyone feels they should be entitled to.

Not all sixth forms have proms. My dc’s school had prom yr11 and a fancy dress pub crawl for last day in sixth form. She’s only had one society ball at uni and it wasn’t overly fancy. So school prom was a one off event.

I think it's actually disturbing. Consumerism to that degree.

I don't like the whole concept of "proms" anyway. Seems like a massive Queen Bee event and the kids who don't fit in or who think they're ugly or whose parents won't engage with it end up feeling even more shit

100%

Mugged by an American idea to help dress shops and expensive car companies

I don’t agree. When I was at school I couldn’t afford to go on a sports trip abroad. My parents told me they couldn’t afford it and that was that. Should the parents of the kids who could afford it not have sent them incase my parents felt pressured or I felt left out?

i am a massive hypocrite having been seduced into buying a new dress when I intended not to but the difference it makes is that everyone feels the pressure to spend more when other parents do. We also need to guard against sending out the message that you have to spend a lot of money to look or feel good. The boy prom experience is very different. There’s a feminist message in here somewhere …,

Yes I’m sure they would, but she liked the £500 one and we could afford the £500 one so what difference does it make to anyone else?

You can spend as much or as little as you feel comfortable with and the price you pay will have very little bearing on how good a night your daughter has. I’ve been to tens of proms (teacher) and seen the full range. I fully intended not to get caught up in the drama or pressure for my daughter’s prom but ended up spending 200 quid when we just went in to try on! Regret it slightly as loads of fab dresses on Vinted and the prom dress is hanging up having been worn once (but we will sell it in the new year). It’s basically a teenage disco which has been overhyped.its only once in a lifetime if they don’t go to sixth form or uni or ever socialise again. Most kids I know say the prinks or the after party were far better (and lots are in their jeans for the afters) so my advice is shop around and don’t believe or add to the hype!!

They'd had probably made a fuss is the dress was £250 as well. We have a shop that does prom dresses in the town and they guarantee not sell the same one to anyone else attending that school prom

Neither did we, neither does DS school end of Y13 only

There is definitely not the case at DD’s school. I have a graduate degree and a professional job and have just spent £500 on a dress for DD’s prom. I would say that at least two thirds of her friend group have already bought similar priced dresses and I can’t think of many of the parents who don’t have a degree.

I don’t regret spending it for a second. We can afford it and despite my scepticism when we went to try them on, it was a lovely experience. We took my very elderly relative who adores dd and tried dresses on for an hour. The shop assistants made a massive fuss of both 16 year old dd and 95 year old relative and they both left absolutely beaming. Do I know they were making a massive fuss to make a sale? Absolutely. Do I care after seeing them both so happy? Nope.

Surely it’s not hard for people to understand that different people place value on different things? I don’t like wine and so can’t imagine paying hundreds of pounds for a vintage bottle of wine when it’s gone in a few glasses. I don’t begrudge or ridicule people who enjoy doing it though because each to their own 🤷‍♀️

We didn't call it a prom but we did have a sit down meal in a local restaurant with a disco after and everyone had a new outfit and the girls had a fresh perm🤣
I think we were allowed a glass of wine.

Yeah I scraped into doing O levels. 3 days younger and Id have been gcse year lol. Maybe it was the miserable nuns at our school disapproved on idea of prom

I did after my GCSE,s in 1990,so did my sister who must be a year younger than you,as she was in the first cohort to sit GCSE,s rather than Olevels in 1988

Of course I accept it! I just think it’s unusual to buy your child an OTT prom dress in order to put her off making a fuss over her wedding in the future. But perhaps lots of parents have that rationale, what do I know ;-)

We had a post gcse party in the mid 1990s which wasnt very formal - my mum insisted I should wear "a nice dress" because everyone else would be, (i didnt) they weren't, it was fairly mixed but a prom dress would have been ott for the event. She died when DD was very young, but I did think of her when we got a very nice, (but v £££) dress for DD for prom, she'd have loved it.

Guilty! £375 on her dress, £80 on hair and makeup luckily had a friend with a vintage car. I left school in 1998 my dress cost £80 and I did my hair and makeup myself- unfortunately it's how it is now, was I happy about spending all that money no but my daughter looked stunning and had a wonderful time and has been left with amazing memories so it was worth it. One more daughter to go and 3 sons! Xxx

What about after O level? I didn't have anything like that in 87 after O levels

What about after O level? I didn't have anything like that in 87 after O levels

Lol one of the school proms were in the golf club nearby. The other was at Boreham house which is a lovely listed building