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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that I can go to this baby class?

212 replies

Gerbera55 · 29/10/2025 16:48

Background info:
A friend and I are both teachers so have an understanding of how language development works and how important it is. I am a mum to a 12 week old.
My council have released information about a language development focus baby class they are going to run at a local children’s centre. They haven’t announced cost yet, but based on other classes I have seen, it will likely be free or very low cost.
I saw my friend today and she asked about any classes I have been doing with baby. I told her about the baby massage and sensory classes I have been doing. I mentioned the language development class to her and she told me she thinks I shouldn’t go because I know how to support my baby’s language development, so I should leave the spaces for mums from low income families who can’t afford classes or for those parents who need support with language development.
In one sense I can see where she’s coming from, but equally my maternity pay won’t stretch to the more expensive classes for much longer and also I want to do as much as possible to support my child’s language development, especially with them being August born.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Ooogle · 29/10/2025 17:02

Of course you can go if you want to. I can’t see an issue. Teachers are not millionaires 😆

Gerbera55 · 29/10/2025 17:01

Favouritefruits · 29/10/2025 16:52

That’s the kind of rubbish my mum would come out with too! (Apparently I shouldn’t shop in charity shops as I should leave it for the less fortunate 🙄)

It’s exactly made for mums like you! Go and enjoy yourself and meet likeminded parents! have a lovely time.

I love a charity shop - I also donate plenty so hopefully your mum will be happy with that! 😂

OP posts:
ThePartyArtist · 29/10/2025 17:01

You are perfectly entitled to go. Providers also have ways to target classes to those in need. If this one's open access, you are as entitled as anyone else to go! There are benefits for you and your baby, beyond just the language development. Go without feeling self conscious and just leave your friend to it.

YourLuckyBrickOtter · 29/10/2025 16:59

Gerbera55 · 29/10/2025 16:58

I’m about as far from middle class living in a gentrified area as you can get! 😂

Youre a professional on maternity leave, a teacher right? What does your husband/partner do? Do you own your house or privately rent it?

Gerbera55 · 29/10/2025 16:59

FuzzyWolf · 29/10/2025 16:54

If it’s council run then it might be eligibility is dependant upon being in receipt of certain benefits or being known to social services.

Yes this is a valid point although other classes they’ve run haven’t had any criteria such as this.

OP posts:
Gerbera55 · 29/10/2025 16:58

YourLuckyBrickOtter · 29/10/2025 16:54

I agree with your friend. Pay for classes and leave these free ones for the people they are meant to target. This is part of the reason we don't have SureStart any more. The "sharp elbowed" middle classes living in gentrified areas and taking away the resources from those most deprived. I do find it really selfish, I have to say.

I’m about as far from middle class living in a gentrified area as you can get! 😂

OP posts:
HillOf · 29/10/2025 16:57

At 12 weeks, any form of baby class is completely pointless for the baby, and is purely for the accompanying parent who wants to get out if the house. Your baby doesn’t need his language development supported any more than he needs a massage.

MaplePumpkin · 29/10/2025 16:57

I think you should go! It’s not like there’s some big long waiting list and you’re actively taking someone else’s place. I’m sure there’s room for both!

YourLuckyBrickOtter · 29/10/2025 16:55

Favouritefruits · 29/10/2025 16:52

That’s the kind of rubbish my mum would come out with too! (Apparently I shouldn’t shop in charity shops as I should leave it for the less fortunate 🙄)

It’s exactly made for mums like you! Go and enjoy yourself and meet likeminded parents! have a lovely time.

No they typically arent but don't always have a way of ensuring those most in need benefit before those most in the know.

YourLuckyBrickOtter · 29/10/2025 16:54

I agree with your friend. Pay for classes and leave these free ones for the people they are meant to target. This is part of the reason we don't have SureStart any more. The "sharp elbowed" middle classes living in gentrified areas and taking away the resources from those most deprived. I do find it really selfish, I have to say.

FuzzyWolf · 29/10/2025 16:54

If it’s council run then it might be eligibility is dependant upon being in receipt of certain benefits or being known to social services.

Favouritefruits · 29/10/2025 16:52

That’s the kind of rubbish my mum would come out with too! (Apparently I shouldn’t shop in charity shops as I should leave it for the less fortunate 🙄)

It’s exactly made for mums like you! Go and enjoy yourself and meet likeminded parents! have a lovely time.

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