To think that I can go to this baby class?

Hm. I’d see a point in leaving spaces for other more disadvantaged mothers if spaces were in short supply. However, until recently I lived in a very deprived area and helped organise these types of groups - we literally had to beg and bribe local people to attend so that we had enough numbers to justify funding for running the sessions.

Is there a way you could ask the people running it? Not sure how easy that would be, but we always advertised contact numbers and emails for questions about the events

You are perfectly entitled to go to the class if you want.
the class is pointless for the baby at this stage but good for you to get out of the house, meet others in the community etc.

Im not insecure about it. I just know that when people have turned up desperate for cheap uniform, Tarquin and 'Tory's mum has already bought it all.

We lived on a deprived social housing estate when I had my first child (kind of outing but lived there through DH’s work). There was a similar class at our local family centre and I made two mum friends there I’m still friends with. I also learnt a lot because although, like you, I’m a teacher I’d never been a parent before.

One Mum on the course did make a snarky comment about “hummus mummies” but actually I got quite friendly with her by the time we left that area since our kids were the same age and I often saw her at the playground.

That's about something else though. For instance, a poster above spoke about her kids regularly wearing stained clothes to school. I was a teen mum. If I took my oldest to school like that frequently, I think they'd have said he was being neglected and got the social services involved. Less so with my youngers where I had a bit more social status.

That might just be my perception, or it is based on a reality where deprivation means that things like scruffy or secondhand clothes are more harshly judged.

I don't agree. When my DC were small I went on a parenting course. I signed up and found it really useful. I had no idea what other people's circumstances were - later found out that some people had been made to go on the course by social services, but I couldn't have told you which were which.

'Professionals' give enough into the bloody system so why the hell shouldn't we benefit from it occasionally.

Ours is donate what you can or just help yourself. We’re in ‘an affluent area’ but that doesn’t really mean much these days. Lots of people are really struggling.
PTA getting the money is good though, without them we’d be missing out on loads of things that we just can’t afford in the budget.

Nah, a quick look online says the wealthy in my area is significantly above the national average, indicating an affluent population and we all love the second hand uniform. The pupil premium at my child’s school is 5%.

I think you are mistakenly projecting your insecurities about second hand uniform.

You sound very bitter.

Not sure why you've got this idea that all families who aren't dragging their heels through poverty are snobbish and doing gym and loft conversions?

OP, as a decidedly 'middle class' family (what does that even mean anymore) ive attended free baby massage and weaning groups run by the council. If you are allowed to go, please do. You're just as worthy of a place as anyone else and I'm sure you and your family pay council tax which goes towards running these classes.

I don't think Surestart was scaled back because the odd middle class mum popped along to the toy library. It was actually hugely successful but austerity meant it was harder to keep universal access. Arguably though parenting really is universal experience and it's good for parents to be able to access support (and mix together) no matter their usual income. That isn't to say there shouldn't be targeting, and I do wonder really whether you'll get anything out of the course. It might well be things like teaching rhymes (there are plenty of people who know none) and explaining the importance of parent facing pushchairs or sharing books.

Whether actual mixing and sharing of the experience happens is often down to the person running the group. If you go open minded and keen to learn I can't see why you shouldnt be there

But that can feed the stigma that these things are only for those who are poor and make it so people are actually less likely to use them. I live and work in a deprived area and often those who need these things won’t use them because they worry how it looks.

If it is made accessible to all then those who need it are more likely to be comfy using it.

I think it really depends on the class. I saw a playgroup being advertised near to me and it says there is no requirement for parents to read or write at the sessions. My baby is not the target audience for that particular kind of group so I wouldn't go to that one.

Your friend is talking rubbish. Your child has as much right to support as any other child.

Is yours free? Ours isnt..it is resold and the money goes to the PTA. Both Primary and Secondary. Primary they do 50% off. Secondary it depends on price and condition. You will pay a max of 2/3 the price I think

Totally agree - the amount of stuff we have in school as donated uniform is ridiculous. Bags and bags of it. Much better it be used than ends up landfill.

She’s talking drivel. Loads of teachers have absolutely no idea about language acquisition. I have taught for 20+ years, been a senco, deputy head etc and have no idea.
I do know how to plan a good maths lesson for Year 3 and what I don’t know about the Tudors in the KS2 curriculum isn’t worth knowing 😆 but baby’s language development?! No clue.
Unless it’s directed at a particular group of parents which you aren’t part of, then it’s up to you if you go and signing up to stuff will help keep these brilliant resources going.

Edited because half term and I can’t write sentences that make sense!

Some of us leave it for people who need it more than we do. If we can buy, we do. I think it depends on your values and how many truly deprived people are around you.

I use the school uniform exchange. I have plenty of money. There is no shortage of clothing available and it’s all decent quality stuff available. I use it because I don’t see the point in people buying stuff year after year when there is perfectly good stuff available second hand.

It would take a lot of school uniform to pay for a major house renovation.

I can actually see her point of view. Free and low cost classes are often seized by better off people-look what happened to SureStart.

Never too early. Babies are like sponges so communication with them matters from birth!

It’s all second (third and fourth) hand uniform where I am. We all pass down coats, shoes and general outgrown clothes galore.

My youngest child is in Y2 and for his entire schooling time I’ve only bought him some white school shirts because I thought a school photo with one that was white (rather than the stains he has on most of them) would look better. All his trousers, jumpers, PE kit and school bags have been second hand.

Once outgrown, I just pop back into the school’s PTA box and it will be used by another child.

Yes absolutely. I asked a few questions to establish class.

Isn’t it a bit early to be concerned about your baby’s language skills?

I don’t think there is anything wrong with attending any class if it’s open to anyone, I’m just wondering whether a class for developing language skills is necessary for a baby of that age.