Is this really what primary school kids are like?

DD is at a little village school so I thought we'd get away with it for longer but its been creeping in now she's in Y3. She came home the other day telling me her "uggs are fake" and I was like "you mean those fluffy boots I got you from Sainsbury's??". There's definitely no self care routines, none of them have phones, DD doesn't even have access to a tablet so has no idea what Roblox is and birthday parties tend to be trampoline parks/ high ropes courses/ice skating, stuff like that, but they all want Stanleys and labubus. To my shame she has both, because she knows when me and DH say no she just asks her uncle (my brother) and he'll buy her things I deem to be a waste of money. She doesn't even use the bloody Stanley, the spout is too stiff for her so now I take it to the gym. 😂

I have two 8yr olds and no, not see anything like this. Parties are bowling, swimming, ice skating, arcade, bouncy castles still. Presents are Lego, craft sets, books, kites …

No, it's not a coincidence. Tiktok and snap is the reason why they're like this. It's so fucking sad.

My DD is in Y7 and there was none of that at her primary school. She’s got some make up now but it’s just normal stuff from Superdrug. It really depends on the other kids around her. I’ve got a friend who’s very glamorous, always looks really beautifully put-together, and her similar-aged daughter knows way more about this stuff because it’s a normal part of life in their house.

My year 3 DD wanted a unicorn for Christmas. I asked her if she wanted a cuddly one and she said no, she wanted a real one!

No, not here.

10/ 11 year old parties here are climbing / sleepovers with film etc. Several girls dance / gymnastics and may wear lip balm but the only time they are in full make up is for dance shows which is then quickly removed! Others lots of netball, music, guides etc.

The primary school here is very anti phone, often sends out notes about age restrictions on WhatsApp and SM. The majority of year 6 do not have phones.

The local secondary school does not allow make up, nail polish etc so I hope that girls will be able to enjoy young tween years without expectation of adult facial care / make up.

I teach Year 4 and more than half the class are like this. Influenced by social media, talking about newest Tiktok dances, etc. Only a small portion of kids in the class are actually taking part in "childish" activies. I heard one of the kids in the class I teach say that for their coming-up birthday, they wanted a Sephora gift card and a new phone because "my one is really old".

My daughter is year 5 and I let her have hers done this summer. She was one of only a few girls without pierced ears and had been asking for a long time. Quite a few had theirs done as babies/toddlers.

I know lots of people saying YouTube/social media is the influence but I think this again comes back for what the child watches. My daughter has spent a lot of half term watching YouTube drawing videos and has then been replicating the drawings. This has kept her busy for hours and she has lots of lovely pictures to show from it.
Don't get me wrong I bet there are other videos that slip in when she is supposedly doing her drawing, but on the whole she (at the moment) is quite sensible in what she watches (and I don't have Tiktok myself so she certainly isn't on that).

The vast majority of girls have their ears pierced in Year 5 and a few of the boys too.

I was one of the first in my school year to get my ears pierced at 12. I wasn't keen. My friends were desperate to get theirs done but parents said no. It wouldn't have crossed our minds in year 5.

I absolutely despise tiktok. I don’t have it, and my 7 yo DD has never watched it. I can’t protect her from it forever (and she could easily come across it on a play date), but in our house, it’s a firm NO.

I completely agree with you.

There's a direct correlation to exposure to TikTok and unsupervised YouTube access and this IMO.

My DD has a friend who had a skincare routine and liked particular brands similar to those at 7. My daughter also wanted these things (because her friend had them), I said it wasn't age appropriate and that was the end of it.

I've noticed that this child's parents are also avid TikTokkers and invested in that whole superficial 'lifestyle'. Her mum reminds me of one of the US pageant mums. The child is overdosed on social media, has had a smart TV in her bedroom since she was 6, a mobile phone since she was 7, has a laptop and an iPad with unrestricted access. Her behavior has really taken a turn for the worse.

I know all this because we were close friends, as were our DDs, but their parenting choices and their child's behaviour has led to me creating distance, unfortunately.

For some kids it is. My girl is 10 next month and only wears makeup at school discos (kids glittery eyeshadow and lipgloss). She despises jeans and only wants leggings or joggers with T-shirts to be comfy. Also not a fan of crop tops, several of her T-shirts are from the boys section because they have things she likes on them like Minecraft.

I’ve not pushed her that way, it’s just what she prefers still even though her best friends are very much getting into skincare and makeup. The difference may be that’s she’s never seen TikTok (at home) or watched beauty influencers to think so deeply about her appearance. She does watch YouTube but she’s into Lego and video games and content related to those.

You wouldn’t get in our primary school door in hooped earrings - they start every day with exercise and no kids should be running round in hooped earrings. Why does a primary child who will be running and playing need hooped earrings? That’s the parents not parenting. Not seen any girls in make up at our primary thankfully.

Not around where we live (a very outdoorsy area). The girls in my Sons class (older primary school) are more into football than make up (thankfully!). Friends with older primary girls haven’t mentioned make up to me so can’t be an issue. I guess it depends what area you live in but kids that age would rather be outside than in make up shops here (thankfully theres’s nothing but a small boots near us). Wouldn’t have an issue with buying the odd nail polish but such a waste of money and childhood. Theres so many years when they are older they can get into make up (if they want to).

DS1 is year 5 and none of his female friends seem into that sort of stuff yet...hobbies/interests seem to include football, harry potter, and drawing. When I see them in own clothes day they are usually wearing jeans or leggings and jumpers. One girls has a sequin jacket for parties.

Not that I'm aware of. They seem to accept light make up for the Year 5's & 6's but they also seem to accept a slight lax on school unform rules too such as girls wearing hooped ear rings and black leggings instead of trousers or a skirt.

My niece just turned 9 and had been 'into' skincare for a year. She watches you tube on skincare. She had a friends and family party and then took 4 friends to a day spa for hot tub and facials and then a sleepover. She had a new Stanley cup and products like you describe. She's in a mixed year group school, is very tall for her age (in 13 to 14 clothes, size 5 shoes). She has lots of family friends that are older but no older siblings. I wonder if she's the 'norm' but not sure. In contrast my nearly 7 year old loves crafts, dressing up, playing with duplo, having a nature table and building dens. He still likes topsy and tim, waffle doggy and not into things like marvel even. Im not sure he'll be anywhere near the boy version of that stage at 8 or 9.

Do the school not challenge the make up as well as dealing with the WhatsApp fall outs? My kids school keep wipes in the office for anyone wearing make up on a normal school day, the only time it's allowed is non uniform days.
I did once see the headteacher having to talk to a parent about their child's nails and telling them they would have to remove them as they weren't safe for school and the child wasn't allowed out at lunch or break because of this. The parent was horrified! Not sure if they did get them removed in the end or the child just stayed in.

Half or more of these kids are on TT and so are their mums so they are all being influenced to follow that particular style. I do wonder how so many can afford this during a COL increase. Psychologically mums want their little girls to fit in with their peer and friendship group. On an even sadder level, influenced mums want their girls to fit a certain aesthetic, it's all quite shallow really. Developmentally it's not great for these poor primary school children in Ugg boots, crop tops and fully made up Sephora faces. It's not brilliant for growing real friendships and learning about genuine connection. Pure consumerism.

Reading the replies it does seem to be school/area dependent. Some have said all the girls are like that in their child's class, for many it's a minority of girls or non existent in the class.

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

Sounds tacky - and also very London / South East

DS is in Year 5 and it describes most of the girls in his class. The majority (including boys) all have iphones, the girls all wear light makeup and school is constantly sending emails about problematic whatsapp/discord groups.

Pamper parties etc are also popular for girls birthday parties. The boys are still into lego, football, marvel etc and seem much younger.