Feminism sold a lie - Women, today, are worse off than ever

This!

Absolutely - in the 70s to 90s my dad spent money as he wished and my mum made an art form of making do on what he left. She ran his house, managed all the bills, looked after me and my grandparents and did all the admin for his self-employed work whilst tolerating and soothing his periodic outbursts of bad temper about her cooking and the fact that according to him she "didn't work". We had very little money and she and I had very few clothes until I started working part time. It took me years to work out that the reason we had so little money was because what we had was net of my dad's drink, fags etc.

What OP and others forget is that when you're a SAHM the quality of your life and mental health is completely dependent upon the temperament and ethics of the man who's keeping you. I am genuinely horrified that people who haven't experienced the sharp end of that lack the ability to imagine how shit it is.

Of course things are better on many ways.

But I wish women could see that a lot of contemporary feminist thinking around sexual behaviour plays into the hands of men. This jumps out at me very strongly just reading MN!

I’ve been called a prude and uptight many times on here but I’m aware that having a shag with someone you’ve just met is rarely going to end well. It only works if you have a totally unemotional attitude to sex and see it as a bodily function, like going to the loo. I honestly don’t think many women have that attitude and being so available and accommodating is not in their best interest - it certainly suits the male agenda, though, and OLD in particular seems to have been designed with sexually unscrupulous men in mind.

What has any of this to do wirh feminism? It is capitalism and economics

You are living in cloud cuckoo land if you think women acould stay home and live off men's wages in the past. Some richer ones might have but poor women have always had to work to earn money to make ends meet ( sometmes called pin money), married or not, they just had very very little choice about what work they could ( or were allowed to do) and what they would be paid

that I can get a termination safely and it be my choice to
That I can make the choice to divorce my ex husband
That I have equal pay
That my husband (if I was married now) could be charged with raping me
That there is support for me should I be the victim of domestic abuse or sexual violence
that I have maternity right and care leave rights
that I have laws to support me being treated as an equal to a man

wtf some need to read up on women’s history if they truly believe women and it better before

Yeah, capitalism has truly shat on us. Particularly those from previously excluded or vulnerable groups such as women, ethnic minorities or the disabled etc.

I'd love to know where all of these 50s - 70s men were who gave all of their money to support their families. They gave what they wanted to give & blew the rest at the pub & bookies. My memories of the 70s are of idle dictating men & women who worked their fingers to the absolute bone, & then still never refused an opportunity to earn a few pounds doing cleaning, ironing, sewing etc. My mother used to walk my little brother & I 2 miles each way to a book flex factory to get materials for making shopping bags. Those bags fed us, not the pittance she got from the big 70s man. And this was the norm where I lived (mining town), not the exception.

CAPITALISM sold the lie.

Feminism still recognises we're still fucked.

Gen X here - I am 51 and this is nothing new. I work full time with three kids and will do this until I am at least 60. My mother also worked as did her mother and this goes back generations.

I am putting three girls through university and they will also work.

I’ve always taught them that economic independence from a man is freedom and dignity. With your own income you can make choices about your life and in that way it would be better. My job is tough but still interests me and gives me satisfaction.

(however I will admit sometimes I look at friends who do not work and envy the time they have to do things like housework, gym, shopping!)

Agreed - I don’t know any household that can support a family on £45k a year 🙄

I don't know where that poster lives but I recall her taking about her two large landscaped gardens. So I assume there's some inherited housing or similar unusual set up.

We can have it all and do it all but all of it is a hell of a lot to manage! Which is why we need men to have their revolution seeking part time work and time with their kids to make their marriages work and give their lives meaning.
Women asked for equality not to do everything! Too many women are frazzled and overloaded while their men are disengaged, unsupportive and ruining their own lives and their family’s lives. Might be biased based on my experience but I see the same everywhere.

Yes. I've often said that women are far worse off now than at any stage before. Women are no longer able to meet as a sex class. We are called 'birthers' and 'menstruators' and 'cervix-havers', at no stage in the past were we ever so dehumanised in words. We are back to the urinary leash times, we do not have a place we can pee or change our sanitary products or even change without the male sex there. Girls are staying home from school when on their period because boys in the toilets laugh at the 'sound' of them unwrapping pads, and also kick over the sanitary bin. We can no longer even request a female to do a pap smear, ffs! At no stage in history have women and girls been so dehumanised and disenfranchised of our basic dignity and basic human rights. give me the 70s and 80s and 90s back any day.

Where do you live?

The first one yes except most women do go in assuming they will be treated as an equal often they discover that’s not the case once they are pregnant/have children. And because the cost of living is so high they can’t afford to leave.
The second one is only relevant to those who can afford it.

About time

This BS is what you get from people who have no effing clue about how life was back in the day.

This is precisely why the birth rate will continue to drop off a cliff. The younger women are not buying into any of it. It’s utterly thankless.

No, I don’t think it sold a lie.

Women foolishly believed men might grow up and share the responsibility of the domestic labour. And foolishly believed absent fathers would be forced to pay what is fair for the cost of bringing up a child.

This didn’t happen.

But we can choose to not have children and we can choose to not become carers.

So does mine! There's no point complaining about the failure of feminism if you had a free choice of partner and you picked a bloke who doesn't pull his weight and facilitated him in doing so.

It’s not feminism you’re angry with but capitalism.

There are two answers to the mental load - find a partner who you can equally share your life with or outsource. Both afforded by being a feminist.

What is this op drivelling on about? Women have always worked both my grandmothers did and one was born in 1909. At least we get paid properly for our work now thanks to feminists..

Or would you prefer to experience what my great grandmother did - one of the first women to go to university one of the best in her year. Only she wasn’t actually given a degree just a permit to teach 🙄. You want to go back to that?! You fool.

Indeed. It amazes me how people get to have such a poor and one dimensional "understanding " of feminism. As I have said in my post, if they think women's rights ans their empowerment is so terrible they can move to Afghanistan. The poison of the tiktok tradwife runs deep

Most men have most power most of the time. Their complaints confirms this. There are various levels and types of power. The lack of mechanisms to support women with children is itself an issue of power differences and a hallmark of capitalism which itself is driven by corporations largely l owned and managed by men. A woman having to do the bulk of work at home compared to her male partner is an issue of domestic power. The issue of a man working too hard to have work life balance is an issue of power and the core of capitalism. So may be it's more complex but that doesn't mean women had it better when they had more limited choices on whether to work or not, what jobs they could take up, hardly any maternity leave, where it was more often than not considered ok to beat a woman and to always blame them for being sexually attacked than now. Anyone who thinks so can always move to Afghanistan where women do live under those conditions. We can have a swapping system. One in one out

If women get more choosy about men, the human race will probably die out.