Feminism sold a lie - Women, today, are worse off than ever

I’ve always done exactly what I’ve wanted when I’ve wanted, unlike many poor women nowadays who are priced out entirely of staying at home, many of whom would like to. I’m very fortunate, and hope the cost of living comes down so more have this perfectly valid option again!

Me too! There's nothing unique about wishing you could work less and not being able to for financial reasons.

So what exactly are the unique challenges faced by working mums today, do you think, and how do you think these challenges differ from those of working mums in previous generations? I'm genuinely interested.

Interesting that you want your freedom to choose how to live your life, which is fair enough. But in a pre or post-feminist world in which men hold all the cards, your wants and needs mean nothing.

And I would divorce one who expected me to stay home and be a housewife after maternity leave.

BTW - is your username real or sarcastic?

No, it’s always the women on here demanding that other women split everything 50:50 with their DH, failing to see that some women do not want to do that and are very happy running their own homes. I know many like that. People on here are beyond patronising.

Hopefully he can afford to pay the bills and not divorce you several years down the line when you have no way to support yourself, leaving you without money, pension or assets.

@ThankYouNigel Are you married?

The only people objecting to equality are those that think maternity leave is an example of feminising society to the detriment of men.

That’s shit

all we are saying is it’s not the fault of feminism

it is partly a failing - not gone far enough and partly a reflection of extreme capitalism

Nothing I said suggests I underestimate women. The point which I am making is that structurally as a society, we must continue our efforts to achieve equality. That also means having the options to go up the career ladder. I do also think that you completely underestimate the challenges faced by everyone in the workforce nowadays. It's hard to keep one's job, let alone just walz back into one. But that's maybe for a different thread. As for 'remarrying', why on earth should that even come into it?

True feminism would support them in their choice.
If their partner can support a household on one income- crack on.
Personally I prefer financial independance.

You miss the point, and clearly don’t appreciate that women aren’t one group who all think the same.

For many women, what their husbands think is utterly irrelevant- they want to be at home. They love their homes, husbands and children.

I would divorce a man who tried to send me out to work away from my young children in a heartbeat!

It has nothing to do with "understanding". It is about beliefs.

You're entitled to your beliefs and to live your life as you see fit, but please don't try to patronise other women or imply that your way is somehow better because you and your H "understand" something that others haven't quite grasped. We understand your position, we simply don't agree that your approach to organising family life is better because it is notin line with our beliefs and values.

I'm a knife wielding alcoholic..... should I be allowed to look after children?

I burnt mine thanks to Germaine Greer in the 70’s…. I don’t think anyone could cope with me ripping mine off now…😳😳😳

@Paganpentacle I think some women would actually like it if they had to resign from their job when they got married. It would give them a real excuse not to work.

I think you're safe.
Most women wouldnt marry a man who expected you to stay in the kitchen.

Nope, for some couples mum is the breadwinner and Dad stays at home. It’s a model that works brilliantly for many, rather than both running around trying to work, clean, parent, etc. Each person has less to do overall and way more free time to relax, recharge, do what they want. I would never in a million years try and do 2 people’s work, whether paid or unpaid.

I really don't get this "most women were housewives in the past" bullshit. There's not been a single generation of women in my family who haven't worked as mothers.

The only difference is now we can choose our careers and demand fair pay.

I'm not an older mumsnetter, maybe only slightly; I started having kids young and still have a little 8 year old at home. I am well aware of the challenges faced by mums of today. I am one! But anything implying that feminism is the issue here and that MEN have the key to all our problems makes me break out in hives. We must push for better childcare provisions and MORE equality in the workplace, not less.

Thats economics- not feminism.

You want to go back to the days where a woman couldnt have her own bank account? Or had to ask a male person to sign things for her? Or resign her job when she got married?

You underestimate massively how resourceful women are, especially housewives, which is misogynistic in itself. Plenty walk back into the workforce if life demands that they must, even though it’s far from their ideal life. Plenty also re-marry with ease.

@ThankYouNigel You're sexist then.

The failure of older Mumsnetters to see the unique challenges faced by working mums of today is quite upsetting to be honest. Absolutely zero fucks given. I’m saying this as someone without children.